How do you make it on Social Security Disability Alone?

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Empower, Nov 13, 2008.

  1. Empower

    Empower New Member

    I have CFS and FMS and I am on social security disability.

    I am contemplating leaving my husband. The stress of living with him is just too hard for me to take anymore. We fight all the time. He makes daily living next to impossible. He is borderline verbally abusive

    For instance, my car check engine light came on and I kept telling him about it and he kept ignoring me. I finally called the garage and asked them to fix it. Well he is TAKING A FIT, because we now have to pay someone to fix it, when HE could have done it himself.

    There are so many situations like this and I just cannot take it anymore. I have had it.

    I just don't know how I can make it on my own just with social security disability. We'd he have to pay me anything? I worked for 20+ years in a good job and when I had to go on the company long term disability, they gave me an "okay settlement package" which went towards the purchase of our home.

    I just can't take it anymore and I feel really really trapped

    Any advice would be appreciated.
  2. 2_TiReD

    2_TiReD New Member

    but I have the same issue: my husband will ignore the car problems until I finally take things into my own hands and then he will actually HIDE the keys from me! Obviously, he has some things to take care of in himself, but until then I feel stuck. Unlike you, however, I am not on disability yet. Just awaiting my ALJ hearing. I was a chemist in my "former life" and to be dependent on someone who tries to control my every move is one frustrating task.

    I believe you would be eligible for spousal support though if you decide you can't handle it any longer.

    Good luck to you.

  3. 3gs

    3gs New Member

    as boderline verabably abusive. he is.

    Yes you can get alimony and there are programs out there to help you.
    H.E.A.T assistance rent and many others. this is how i've made it on my SS(610.00). If your diasbility is low SSDI helps and you get food stamps and medicaid.

    No not how id like to be living(wked 2 jobs before having to quit).

    Please don't stay trapped(i was in an abusive marriage best thing I did was get out). This will continue to zap your health. sounds like he is passive aggresive.

  4. landra

    landra New Member

    You probably need to consult a lawyer to get a good idea of the process for you - because some of the answers will depend on the divorce and property issues. Some attorneys will do a consultation for a small fee.

    Is the house in both your names? Then it belongs to both of you and will be spilt up; you probably won't get the "lump sum" amount out of it. If the house is in your name, you would get the lump sume and some of the equity - a larger amount. Of course this a bad time to try to sell. Each state is different regarding "spousal support" in a case like yours where you did work and now cannot. So what happened one place may not apply. Only an attorney could advise you on that in your case.

    For myself, I have refinanced my home to get a lower monthly payment, gotten on the state low-income insurance (not all states have this), am applying for pharmacy assistance programs, have no credit card balances, and car is paid for.

    When you are single, you may be able to apply for low-income housing. In some cases there is low income housing for senior citizens and disabled people; your county social services should be able to direct you to that. The problem is, for many assistance programs, you have to be single (or married w/ spouse also not working) to qualify.

    Is there someone you could stay with for an extended period of time while you sort all this out? Perhaps there is somone who needs a "roommate" - or even a live-in job with someone less able than you?

    I used to be a counselor/social worker andhelped people access programs. [Imagine my dismay when I had to access the programs myself!] I'll be glad to answer questions, if I can.

    And let me know what your husband thinks of Bi Yan Pian!
  5. hensue

    hensue New Member

    and you would get half. If it is your name and you put enough down and if the housing prices havent gone down.
    i guess you have your doc and medicine paid for now if you have ssdi. What state do you live in. If you have assets everything in my state is mine and in some cases with an attorney.
    he could have to pay you if he is verbally abusive or there are other things involved.
    Is he being like this because are not employed anymore?
    just wondering i am not either
    let me know try to get some
    I keep telling my husband i will take him for every thing he doesnt own.
    he doesnt need me that is a cinch it isnt like i contribute anymore
    so hang in there maybe you could go and get some advice dont do anything hasty like move out
    Hang in there
  6. mbofov

    mbofov Active Member

    Many have free or low-cost initial consultations. I'm pretty sure you should receive spousal support, especially if your marriage is long-term. But talk to an attorney. You need legal advice which you can't get on this board.

    I got divorced after 22 years of marriage, and receive SSDI and spousal support. He's not happy about paying, but that's too bad. I am doing everything I can to get well, and hope not to have to take his money forever, but it's helped having a lot having it while I work on getting well.

    Stress of living with someone abusive can make you worse. It was hard leaving my husband but it was the best thing I could have done.

    Take care --

  7. Empower

    Empower New Member

    Thank you all for your advice and understanding.

    I have alot to consider.

    Thanks for listening