How do you stay sane?

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by fibrohugslife, Jan 15, 2006.

  1. fibrohugslife

    fibrohugslife New Member

    Hello everyone,

    I have been on this board for gosh a little while now, I don't necessarily remember when I joined, yep fibro fog. I don't remember a lot of stuff nowadays unfortunately.

    I am 29 years old, I have had this illness-Fibromyalgia, CFS, IBS and Depression for about 6-7 years now, so I missed out a lot of the fun stuff in my 20s' due to this illness. I am not married but have a great boyfriend who is a little far away, he is in NY and I am in CA LOL. But he is very supportive and understanding and is there for me which is a need.

    I wanted to ask how do you stay sane with having this illness? I pray a lot and meditate but at the same time I feel like I need something more.

    I lost all of my friends in my state due to me not being able to go out much and do many things, so I just have my parents as my friends. I want to make new friends but I don't know how with this illness as I am unable to go out all of the time and can't afford much.

    I stopped working June of last year as I just could not handle working at all. Since then my depression has gone downhill because I miss working, helping, and the whole interaction with people.

    The only main thing that I do is school online and trying to get my degree which is a good thing. I am trying for SSI, and I have an appeal court date with state disability to explain WHY I can't work. They seem to have a hard time understanding WHY I can't work LOL.

    So I tried hobbies, I used to be heavily into rubber stamping and scrapbooking but lost some interest in it. I listen to music a lot more now and read when I can (if I can concentrate).

    I am in pain all of the time 24/7, and it drives me crazy and I don't know what to do to try to stay sane anymore. I am on anti-depressants but still at the same time dealing with the pain is still so hard.

    Please help!

    Thanks,
    Nicole

  2. kellygirl

    kellygirl Member

    After 20 years with CFS/FMS, I learned we are all afflicted differently. It takes years to learn what works for us. We all react differently to meds and supplements. I can tolerated deep muscle massage, whereas most people w/ CFS/FMS cannot, they need gentle massage.
    It's just trying different things and finding what works. It is a journey. But, being in the healthcare field, I feel fortunate when I see what a lot of people are dealt.
    The main thing is not to give up. As you get older, you will discover there is not many "sane" people out there....LOL
  3. Bambi

    Bambi New Member

    at you but at the concept. I'm 58 and have had this stuff for a LONG time, severe for the last probably 9 or 10 years. Sanity, if there ever was any, left long ago. My life is one big case of chaos.

    I have MY health stuff, in the last two years my husband developed Diabetes 2 and they found a genetic back deformity in his lower back as well as Arthritis, degenerative vertebrae with bone spurs, he has knee problems also. So where I could lean on him and got a lot of help, I still get a lot but not nearly what it was. He surely can't help it.

    We have umpty dump times a zillion pets we see to better than ourselves but our budget, home, car, plans and everything else is in utter disorganization and chaos! We started to move last year and it fell through because the place we bought ended up
    in a flood zone, so our stuff has been packed and in two rooms and a rental storage room for over a year.
    We live out of boxes with our clothes
    and have NO clue where anything else
    is. We kept out just the basics and that's what we try to deal with, not
    sufficient!

    If I wasn't crazy to start with I am
    now. We need to get that place we bought fixed (minor fixup but still it's 150 miles away and weekends he
    ends up too ill to go do it it seems or I do) so we can SELL it, the good
    part is IF we get it done and sold it
    went WAY up in value and would pay off our house.

    Then we could sell the house, get out of debt and pay cash for a med sized mobile on a lot in cooler country and FINALLY have some MAJOR stress reduction and time to relax. I've run ads for someone to help him fix the place and get paid out of escrow but no takers. He can't do it alone and family is useless. It is a constant source of tension and upset between us now!

    SO your post really hit the spot with me and made me laugh out loud!! God needs to send me an angel to help us out of this mess and I haven't noticed any wings at the door lately!
    I hope you feel better soon!!!
  4. granny1353

    granny1353 New Member

    It would be really hard to have this at your age. I cannot imagine. I am 57 and have grandchildren, so at your age I was not ill and did all the things a crazy young adult wants to.

    All I can say is are you on any meds for your depression? I take Lexapro and it really helps. Do you have a good dr. you can talk to, maybe he can help with regulating some meds so you can go out more.

    I will keep you in my prayers, gentle hugs
    Granny
  5. Tigger57

    Tigger57 New Member

    I have none left.
    Tigger
  6. minimonkey

    minimonkey New Member

    But respect your limits, too --

    I developed this at 23, so I know how it feels. I did push myself too hard -- tried to be normal, tried to hide it, did normal 20-something stuff -- and I think I am paying the price now in my late 30s. I still push, but I also listen when my body is screaming for a break -- I've only recently learned that.

    I find that staying involved in something -- anything-- helps me.
  7. darude

    darude New Member

    Laugh and the world laughs with you - weep and you weep alone! I don't know how we get thru but we do somehow. I'm 55 and had a 'normal' life until 52. I'm thankful for that but SURE do miss the old me. I guess i'm "Still crazy after all these years". This board is great and most people still have their sense of humour still going. Only way to hang onto Sanity I guess.

    Annie the Londoner
  8. russiankids3

    russiankids3 New Member

    Just kidding- but I know none of the sane live at my house:)

    I can really relate to what you have shared with us, Nicole. I was diagnosed at 26 years old and I've often said how much I miss the person I used to be before this FM/CFS. I am now 42 and sometimes it's been a struggle to get to this number.

    I battle depression also and sometimes I just wish I would not wake up in the morning. Yes, this sounds very depressing but at times I feel like I can't go on. Fortunately, I am on meds and have had therapy in the past for my depression. It's helped. I try to remind myself how very fortunate I am that I am still able to work part-time and have such an understanding family.

    I also remind myself when I start to feel down that there are people so much worse off than me (some of them post on this board). When I feel good I try to enjoy those times as much as I can.

    It is sad you are missing out on all the fun in your 20's. Sounds like you've got a good guy and you are keeping your brain occupied with schooling. I'm happy for you. Hopefully researchers will find something to help all of us and you can feel like 20 again in your thirties!

    Just remember --all of us on this board feel we are losing our sanity at times, but we still manage to hang in there.
    You will also. These nice people who have answered you will help you a lot.

    Best wishes to you.
    Sue
  9. ellikers

    ellikers New Member

    I'm youngish too, 23, and i had to stop my college education last term because I just couldn't keep up. I think the best things that help keep me sane are doing the most I can (without over doing it, which is hard at times) to enjoy the things I love (and loved way before all this health BS started). :)

    For example, I used to be a really outdoorsy active woman .... mountain biking, hiking, rock climbing, used to lead women's self-defense classes, rode my bike in town as my only form of transportation ... and now I can get sore and winded after walking slowly a couple blocks back when I was taking classes at the university. It's so enraging.

    But I focus on doing whatever amounts of the things I love as I can, and modify things if I need to like go short slow walks when I'm feeling up to it instead of a long hike (like I would like).

    Also,
    - I do yoga (restorative, not aggravating poses) which helps me to clear my head.
    - I try to keep my everyday life as quality as I can- I have started cooking more wholesome and good for me foods (just easy stuff) because that's something I can do
    - I find I'm much happier if I can be productive and do things to take care of myself, so I do things with my body that are relaxing like bathes, stretching, naps
    - I read a lot to keep my mind and imagination active

    I met most of my current friends (and boyfriend) through activities I love- I met my boyfriend through outdoor stuff and my two best friends in town in self-defense things- so I would suggest finding something you love that you can get involved in (however minimally) like volunteer for a cause that is important to you, stuff like that. Then you can find other people that care about something you do, and with that in common I find it's MUCH easier to make friends (and comes naturally and very fast at times!).

    Anyway, I wish you all the best. I hope my ramblings made sense! :)
  10. fibrohugslife

    fibrohugslife New Member

    Okay I am little behind on responding to my own threads that I post here. I have been a little busy with school, and life in general.

    Thank you acesnanna for your nice comment *blush*. I just realized that it does tell when I joined LOL duuuh...a fibro moment there for sure LOL.

    Anyway as for medications, I am on Zoloft to help with my depression, I take Xanax as well to help when Zoloft ellevates my heart rate and it also helps me sleep.

    I take Baclofen which is a muscle relaxer and that helps sometimes but not necessarily with my pain. When my pain is out of control it doesn't do anything for me.

    I was trying Lyrica but my old doctor would not help me any further in telling me how much to take etc due to me filing him on my bankruptcy report soooo LOL, no help there. He was no help anyway right after he diagnosed me, he made me feel like I inconvenienced him with my presence and acted like there was nothing he could do for me and gave up on me. So I am holding off on it until I meet up with another doctor who will hopefully be able to assist me with dosage for the Lyrica and refer me to a specialist like a rheumatologist or something.

    I was on Tramadol but had an allergic reaction to it and I tried a second time after that and did not experience less pain so I assume my body just turned off to that med when it had worked one time before.

    My doctor has put me on Tylenol #3 with codeine and that has done ABSOLUTELY nothing for me but made me feel nauseous and messed up my stomach. So I have given up on this med officially today. So at this time again I have nothing for my pain once again LOL.

    I do take supplements and I drink a strong ginger root concoction to help with my stomach now (my parents make that for me).

    The supplements I am on:

    Black Cherry Juice Extract (the actual cherry juice had too much of a high sugar content for me)
    Calcium (chewable)
    Multivitamin (chewable)
    Magnesium Oxide
    Potassium
    Bromelain
    Niacin
    Vitamin E
    Vitamin A & D
    Vitamin C
    B Complex (liquid)
    Omega 3 Fish Oil Complex
    Biotin
    Aloe Vera juice in my own shake concoctions
    Grapeseed Extract
    Folic Acid
    MSM powder
    CoQ10
    Zinc
    Iron (I am anemic)

    and I THINK that is it, that is all that I can remember right now.

    I take Magnesium and Grapeseed extract when I go to bed on top of the Zoloft and Xanax, and that helps me with sleep even though I STILL wake every few hours in the night.

    I wanted to try Stormskye's shake but my stomach cannot handle a majority of the ingredients in there. So I have my own shake that consists of strawberries, blueberries, and a banana, and I add in Aloe Vera juice, and MSM powder.

    I recently had purchased SAMe FINALLY! So that will be my next thing to try.

    I have had to cancel to my therapist appointments that are the same facility of where I see my current doctor as it is just too far for me to drive to it and my body just cannot handle it.

    I do Yoga and loads of stretching every few hours. When I am feeling okay, I will go for a power walk for about 15-20 minutes. Right now I am trying to get into a warm water exercise class but need to have my doctor who is FAR AWAY for me to drive to sign and authorize me to do that. So I got to figure when I will have enough energy and attention span to do that one. Driving takes sooo much out of me.

    So I don't know LOL, I am really just trying to hang in there and stay sane. I wanted to go in for the therapy counseling sessions and get an official diagnosis for depression so that I could apply for SSI but I think at this time I am better just applying now instead of waiting. I think that SS will see all the meds I am on and see the anti-depressants and probably will figure that part out. I just can't handle the drive and there is a process of procedures I would need to do in order to get help and my body just cannot handle the drive over there.

    So I am just trying to do my best, I am barely getting by in my online classes I am taking. Last class before I was okay, this class here I am going nuts because we are put in groups and my group has driven me crazy. It's HARD to work with people LOL. I have two more days until this class ends and I will have a week to rest my brain until the next class. I mean I get A's and B's in my classes but it's a lot of hard work for me to attain that than from before I was sick.

    All I do now is school pretty much, research on my illness which has become some sort of hobby for me now in a sick way LOL. I used to do lots of rubber stamping but haven't had the creative energy to do it lately but I am slowly stamping again after a 6 month hiatus. I am hoping to restart my Ebay business again but I am not sure when I will be able to do that.

    Anyway if you got through this long post, thank you so much for taking the time to read it.

    I just wanted to attempt to try to answer all the questions that were asked of me.

    Much love,
    Nicole


    [This Message was Edited on 02/12/2006]
    [This Message was Edited on 02/12/2006]