How To Tell Your Child NO

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by budmickl, May 7, 2008.

  1. budmickl

    budmickl New Member

    Every single stinkin' time my daughter borrows something, she brings it back broken or doesn't bring it back at all. This is the 4th YES FOURTH vacuum she has broken. I am livid! It cost more to fix it than to buy a new one. But right now, I couldn't buy a breath of air if it cost more than a dime.

    TV's, furniture, car, stereos, vacuums, dish washer, CD's ... yes, she has borrowed all of these things or 'used' them for longer than 20 minutes and when I got them back... BROKE, WORTHLESS, BEYOND REPAIR.

    Her cars have always had dings and crashes.

    Thanks for letting me vent. I just can't believe she broke it. Her last words when she took it this weekend was 'I promise I won't break it'. I should have known...

  2. mollystwin

    mollystwin New Member

    Did we do too much for our children?? I wonder sometimes.

    Yes, we need to learn to say NO!

    It's hard tho.


    PS maybe she'll buy you a new one for Mother's Day!
  3. budmickl

    budmickl New Member

    That's the best joke I've heard in a long time! She is a sweet heart but not likely to buy me a vacuum. Heck, I'd be happy if she bought herself one so she wouldn't borrow mine!

    We can dream though!

  4. victoria

    victoria New Member

    I think Elaine has the best solution!?!

  5. budmickl

    budmickl New Member

    Elaine - I would love to do that but I keep hoping this will be the time she shows me she has become responsible in a good way, not responsible for all the broken toys and appliances!

    Victoria - Maybe I will send this to daughter. LOL

    Thanks everyone!
  6. Janalynn

    Janalynn New Member

    I would 'test' her with less expensive things - maybe even unbreakable things - like let her borrow a dishtowel or something.
    I'd certainly be telling her NO. Would've told her NO a long time ago.
    You need to put your foot down Mom.
    I like the idea of putting down a "deposit" - a rather hefty one at that. She doesn't have respect for your things or she'd be darn sure they didn't get hurt while in her possession.

    Yep - you should've known. =) So...don't let her borrow anything else, okay? Too much unnecessary stress on you.

    Love Elaine's letter - GREAT!
  7. Doober

    Doober New Member

    You have dogs???

    Do NOT let her take them for a Still be walking into the house with the leash dragging behind her without the dog attached...LOL

    Yeah, I would start requiring a security deposit on any borrowed items.

    Is she a blonde (No offense to the other blonde's here, I just had to asked because of my male stupidity)...LOL

    Wow, A mother's love is a powerful and forgiving thing.

  8. Granniluvsu

    Granniluvsu Well-Known Member

    Dear Bud -

    Maybe it is a good thing that my kids don't live close enough to borrow lots of things (-: !!

    Gee, I think that is great idea of the asking her to put down a deposit especially on expensive things like Vacuums !!

    Kids, you love them but they can drive you crazy sometimes and most of mine are in their 40's and two in their 30's.

    The only one I have given stuff to is my middle child who is presently divorced but is dow engaged. However, whatever I did give stuff to her I did not expect to get back since she had very little to begin with, even when married the first time. Her X was SOOOO cheap.

    I really like Elaine's idea though. Either just say no and if they insist and you think they might really need it ask for a GOOD deposit.


  9. Doober

    Doober New Member

    s-elaine, I made sure I put the "disclaimer" of my male stupidity on the post.

    Come on now, I have nothing against blondes, in fact I keep a couple of them around just to make me look smarter....LOL

    Also, just to make sure, I am typing out this response really slow to make it easier to read. OK????......LOL
  10. budmickl

    budmickl New Member

    Well, she did offer to buy me a new vacuum for Mother's Day. I told her let's see if this can be repaired.

    If she had $100 for a deposit, she wouldn't be borrowing my stuff, she'd go buy it.

    She honestly seems to have a jinx on her life. It hurts me to see how many 'bad breaks' this kid gets, while her sister gets all the 'good breaks'.

    Doober - the dog is the only thing I can be 100% certain that she'd take care of for me. She loves them almost as much as I do!