I just got into a blow out fight with my fiancee, Brian. Brian has been smoking for most of his life...and I told him when we got together (5 years ago) that I didn't date guys who smoked. He said he'd quit and he would but everytime he quit something horrible would happen. His mom tried to commit suicide, his dad died, etc. He'd relapse and I wouldn't raise hell for awhile because things were already so bad for him. He'd smoke awhile and then quit again...then something would happen and the cycle would repeat. Well now we live together and have a toddler. He still smokes and doesn't appear to be making an effort to stop. He only smokes outside and never around the baby but he still reeks of the smoke and the baby had chronic and somtimes almost constant ear infections. Granted they are partly hereditary (my entire extended family had horrible ear infections as children and some still do as adults). So tonight he wanted me to go get him more cigarettes...and I said no. He threw a hissy fit about why I wouldn't do him this favor and I told him it was decause I refused to enable his horrible habit. Then we got into a big fight about him never trying. He'd been drinking, which I also hate when he does it because he does it alone and he gets fussy. Not mean or abusive or anything but fussy and touchy and terribly insensitive. Point is he's stormed off to bed because i'm being "mean" when I really could've brought him to his emotional knees by accusing him of causing Ari's ear infections and making her sick. I don't know what to do about him...I don't know how to make him stop when everytime I ask him to cut down at least he throws a temper tantrum and says he's trying. I know it's hard but damnit I need him to quit for real now. It's not just me anymore it effects. I need any advice you guys have. You're all much more experienced with life than I am. I hope you can help me out. Thanks a lot.