Husband made RUDE comment to me

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by CockatooMom, Jun 24, 2006.

  1. CockatooMom

    CockatooMom New Member

    Hi everyone,

    I always ask my husband not to park too close to the curb in front of our house because it makes it VERY hard for me to get in & out of the car. I like to be able to step out onto the street first.

    Today we came back from an errand and he said..."I know, I parked too close. Well, that's just the way I park."

    I said, "Yes, but it makes it very difficult for me to get out when you do."

    He told me to ROLL OUT!!!

    I said two choice words to him &^$# Y*%
    and told him it has NOTHING to do with how fat I am!

    After we went into the house I told him, "You just don't understand!!"

    Then he wanted me to "smile" so he could take a picture of me & my bird for my profile on here.

    I just don't know what has gotten into him! He used to be SO loving and affectionate. Even when we were split up a few months last year.

    Now that we are back together, he hardly tells me he loves me and isn't affectionate at all.

    I KNOW there is no one else, but it hurts so badly!!
    He say's it's because he has alot on his mind. (Cop-out)

    I have talked to my counsler about it. And he isn't intersted in going for more counseling as a couple.
    I guess he likes his rough & tough exterior.

    Thanks for reading this. I'm just SO UPSET, I didn't know who to tell.






    [This Message was Edited on 06/24/2006]
  2. Sparkgirl

    Sparkgirl New Member

    What an insensitive jerk! I'm so sorry that you have to deal with that. You've got enough problems, I bet...you don't need an unsupportive spouse. Next time he does that, just punch him... GEEZ!



    luv,
    Sparkgirl
  3. MssDarla

    MssDarla New Member

    I feel for you, My husband and I just now had it out,

    I did a lot of crying when he said all we talk about is your FM. and I cant remember the lasat time we had fun.

    I said @#$% that is all my life is about.

    anyways its all ok now but it really hurt.

    I will try not to talk about it to him so much...
    and he will try to be more patient..

    But I told him his only option is to divorce me but this isn't going away.

    He said divorce will never be an option....

    I am glad to know that,

    sorry to hear about your situtation

    Marriage is so tough when one is sick.. tough on both people
  4. spmary

    spmary New Member

    Words can really hurt! I'm so sorry that happened. He probably is too but won't admit it. Just tell him that it
    will continue to hurt until you both have some understanding. So sorry but hope things work out. Love and soft hugs, spmary,mary
  5. lilaclover30

    lilaclover30 New Member

    i am so sorry! No one with this DD deserves that kind of treatment! You have been so sweet to me and i wish that I had a magic word to heal that pain:(

    Just love your fine feathered friends. They will never desert you or treat you unkindly.

    I guess that this is just a part of this DD --- no one wants toi believe us, neither lover, friend or foe.

    Hang in there and we luv u.

    Gentle Hugs and luv from us all,

    Joan
  6. brisklea

    brisklea New Member

    hi Im new but I totally understand. My husband suffered closed head trauma and is in his 3rd yr of recovery. He isnt truly capable of being sensitive anymore and although he tries Ive had to learn to live with the fact he just doesnt have the emotional support to give. It helps to remember guys in general dont "get"pain. It also helps to calmly say I miss the old times to lets find new stuff to do together put it on him to make a list with you keep it simple ex mini golf on a cooler day when not tomany people would be there or a card game. This has helped me alot to stay connected to him. Best wishes.
  7. ldbgcoleman

    ldbgcoleman New Member

    My husband sometimes make rude comments and he doesn't even know what he said. He doesn't have ill intentions it just comes out wrong sometimes. Men truly are clueless sometimes.

    Sounds like your husband did'nt mean it in a mean spirited way and since he has been sweet to you in the past I would give him the benefit of the doubt. it can be very frustating to watch someone you love struggle and maybe he is feeling some of that. Lynn
  8. jake123

    jake123 New Member

    Can you fix it where you are driving one day and you can park it the way he does and see if he likes it?
    He probably doesn't understand that our equilibrium is not the same as everyone else's.[This Message was Edited on 06/24/2006]
  9. ANNXYZ

    ANNXYZ New Member

    you might want to read what you wrote here , and pretend someone else wrote it . The troublesome symptoms you
    are describing are unsettling you as they wouldbe for any other intelligent woman who has a husband who becomes critical and then " unaffectionate " ( though he is described as a rough and tumble "man's man".)

    I wish you the best .
    [This Message was Edited on 06/24/2006]
  10. hugs4evry1

    hugs4evry1 New Member

    I'm sorry your husband said that to you. He's an arse.

    You're not only not fat, you're gorgeous!!!

    Hugs,

    Nancy B.

  11. CockatooMom

    CockatooMom New Member

    Am going to try to address you all....

    Sparkgirl...Yep, I thought about a good punch, but he was too far away! LOL (maybe next time)

    MssDarla...

    Sorry you had a rough time yesterday too. But, VERY glad to hear he won't divorce you!

    Marriage is tough...period, but yes, harder when sickness is involved. I don't know how he even feels about me being sick or if he'd tell me if I asked! I might give it a try.

    ldbgcoleman...

    I would have given him the benefit of the doubt, had he not laughed when he said it. He has become "different." It's hard to explain.

    jake123....

    Good idea. It actually ran across my mind too. But he wouldn't have any problem getting out of the car, and if I scratched the rims or low profile tires on the car, I'd hear about it! (I still might try it though)

    4everkid...

    Thank you for the kind words about the pic. Yes, he tries to be funny, but it is usually at my expense.

    I KNOW he doesn't do it to be MEAN on purpose, he just doesn't know what else to say to be funny. I've tried to ignore it too, sometimes it works for me, sometimes it doesn't. I like the skating rink hang out statement!!

    annxyz...Very interesting thought.

    brisklea...

    So sorry to hear about your husbands head trauma. That must have been horrible for both of you.

    My hubby was recently diagnosed with 2 bulging discs in
    his back. Well, mine is herniated, a little worse. So I feel he CAN relate to pain the way he complains about his own. After taking care of him and babying him and he still acts like he's gonn die, I have told him..."Live a day in MY body!" LOL! ;)

    spmary, mysticbrit, lilaclover30...

    I want to thank you all for the very kind words. I know you all understand, that's why I come here.

    He and I have been through a lot, been together over 12 years, been separated too. But, deep down I know we'll be together the rest of our lives.

    The hurt will fade, then he'll say the next "stupid" thing!

    I love you all SO MUCH!!!!
    Take care everyone and make it a GREAT day!

    C-Mom
  12. CockatooMom

    CockatooMom New Member

    I'll tell him!

    Talk to you soon in CHAT!