Husband undergoing cancer tx in better shape than me.

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Grandma8, Mar 2, 2011.

  1. Grandma8

    Grandma8 New Member

    My husband was recently diagnosed with stomach cancer. He had most of his stomach removed; but, is doing very well. All of his blood tests;and, scans, including PET scan came back negative. Surgeon is quite confident that he got all the cancer out; but, oncologist wants to do at least 6 months of aggresive chemo;and, radiation to make sure cancer won't return. I have suffered from CFS most of my adult life(am 67 yrs old now). I did the best I could to help and support my husband through his surgery;and, hospitalization; but, just can't do any more. I'm am now expected to forget all about my health problems;and, take him for his treatments;and, MD appts. even though he is actually in much better shape that I am.
    We end up having arguments about this;and, I end up feeling very guilty. Anyone have any suggestions on how I can do all that is expected of me without collapsing myself? I love my husband very much;and, certainly, want him to be well; but, I'm feeling worse and worse, both physically and mentally, every day.
  2. Grandma8

    Grandma8 New Member

    Thanks so much for your words of sympathy and encouragement. I knew I would find someone here who would understand what I'm going through without judging me. I feel like a terrible person when I get exhausted;and, irritable;and, say things to him that I would never say if I was feeling better. Everyone is always asking how he is feeling; but, very seldom does anyone ask how I am. I guess I could try asking for help at the oncology center;and, see what they say. I just haven't met many people who even know what CFS.
  3. AuntTammie

    AuntTammie New Member

    You don't have to tell the people at the oncology ctr what you have if you don't think they will understand; just tell them that you have a neuroimmune disorder or somethign similar to MS or even just chronic health issues that severely limit what you are able to do.
  4. Grandma8

    Grandma8 New Member

    Thanks for the suggestion. I will keep that in mind.