I am sick of people saying...

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by momof3dancers, Dec 5, 2002.

  1. momof3dancers

    momof3dancers New Member

    "You sure are sick alot" You sure do feel crappy, achy..or what ever alot" "but you don't "LOOK" sick"

    I feel like I need a tatoo across my forhead that says..."Yes I know I dont LOOK sick but trust me I am" or something like that Why couldnt I have something that made me break out in horrible rash.. so it would be easier for people to believe how badly I feel? UGH

    Anyway as my user name says.. I am a mom of 3 dancers.. and well as such and esecailly now that I am no longer gainfully employeed.. I "work" at the studio to pay for classes.. cleaning, making phone calls, answering phones, altering and making costumes, helping w/ advertising and back stage, consessions, flowers, tickets, you name it I have done it to help off set the cost of all of those dance classes that my daughters all LOVE. But as much as I have said and asked for notice when they need me to do something...Yes I feel obligated to help .. especaily now w/ Nutcracker in a week.. BUT I just dont have the energy...I hurt .. but yet I still feel guilty and cant seem to say no!! But on that RARE occasion that I do say the dredded word (NO) I feel as if I am given the biggest guilt trip.. "But Shannon you know how much we "depend" on you at this time"

    I just want to scream!!!! I know that I am just venting now but !!!!!
  2. momof3dancers

    momof3dancers New Member

    "You sure are sick alot" You sure do feel crappy, achy..or what ever alot" "but you don't "LOOK" sick"

    I feel like I need a tatoo across my forhead that says..."Yes I know I dont LOOK sick but trust me I am" or something like that Why couldnt I have something that made me break out in horrible rash.. so it would be easier for people to believe how badly I feel? UGH

    Anyway as my user name says.. I am a mom of 3 dancers.. and well as such and esecailly now that I am no longer gainfully employeed.. I "work" at the studio to pay for classes.. cleaning, making phone calls, answering phones, altering and making costumes, helping w/ advertising and back stage, consessions, flowers, tickets, you name it I have done it to help off set the cost of all of those dance classes that my daughters all LOVE. But as much as I have said and asked for notice when they need me to do something...Yes I feel obligated to help .. especaily now w/ Nutcracker in a week.. BUT I just dont have the energy...I hurt .. but yet I still feel guilty and cant seem to say no!! But on that RARE occasion that I do say the dredded word (NO) I feel as if I am given the biggest guilt trip.. "But Shannon you know how much we "depend" on you at this time"

    I just want to scream!!!! I know that I am just venting now but !!!!!
  3. LauraLea

    LauraLea New Member

    Guilt, that's a word we can't seem to live without. Do what you can and know that you are giving it your best.

    BTW I like the tatoo idea it just might work.

    This is the place to vent so go on a vent away. It will all work out somehow it always does.

    Happy Holidays ho ho ho.... baa humbug oops don't mean that!
  4. ssMarilyn

    ssMarilyn New Member

    Get used to it, it's not gonna stop anytime soon!

    Marilyn :)
  5. allhart

    allhart New Member

    scream it might help ,this is one thing i think most everyone here has in common the problem is that once someone see you do something 1 time they think your not that sick because you did it beforeso you must be able to do it agin, and yes and it seems that people give most of us worse gulit trips then someone who just says no i dont want to do it,
  6. AnitaQuiles

    AnitaQuiles New Member

    Thank you...I can relate to your story...believe me people, even the ones you think should understand...DO NOT. I cannot tell you how many times I felt like screaming, even not talking to anyone at all. People think that just because you LOOK ok, you are ok. They are so wrong. I am in pain everyday....always!
    Also, I hate it when they think that we are just complaining so someone can feel pity for us! And when people think that if you don't lose weight because you are sooooo lazy for not walking 2 miles a day....when you cannot even get yourselft to walk 1/3 of a mile a day. We need compassion, not people to pinpoint at us! I know what I can and cannot do...I don't let people tell me what my limits are anymore.
    Please take care of yourself.
    anita.
  7. LiteraryPumpkin

    LiteraryPumpkin New Member

    I have Seborrhea along with my FMS, IBS, CFS, ad nauseum. It is a terrible rash. Trust me, it will gain you no sympathy. "Just a rash I see!, get to work dweeb!" The rash is horribly embarrassing and also depressing, not to mention itchy.

    Our beloved brothers and sisters who suffer from FMS, etc, may not sympathize with us either. I took a poll at another site and most said that they looked like crap (lack of sleep, pain etched faces, etc). What could I say in response? I said, "Oh yeah, me too! People are always trying to give me CPR when I go out to restaurants and stuff." Yes, I know I'm a lying dog. I can feel so awful that I pray for death. I hurt so bad sometimes that the only reason that I don't scream is that it would hurt too much. But I look good!

    Give me the money, you can have the looks. At least I could hurt like hell with a wide-screen HDTV to stare at.

    Russell
  8. 1Writer

    1Writer New Member

    That's what we're all "hear" for, right? We all understand and we can take it, right along with the pain. I, like Russell have a rash on my face; rosasea (it's a red rash that looks like a butterfly on my cheeks and nose), so I don't always look all that great, but people still don't really "get it" when I say I don't feel well. I DON'T CARE if they get it or not! So, you tell those other mothers to pitch in when you don't feel good and don't feel guilty...when my daughter took dancing, I had to help, so they can, too! Hang in there Mom...we're with you all the way!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    1Writer
  9. JaciBart

    JaciBart Member

    Hate that ........

    Oh, are you feeling better?

    When are you going to get over this?

    Oh, I thought you were feeling better?

    If you just would make yourself do something you would feel better!

    I know people who have this and they work!

    Jaci