I am So tired of people telling me "you could if you tried"

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by darvick, Aug 1, 2006.

  1. darvick

    darvick New Member

    UGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!! Told my stepson pool is open but cant do it today, cause i splurged on the beach and went walking and swimming,,, paying for it today. His answer was if you just did it for a week straight i bet it wouldnt hurt. Family knows whats involved in FM. And thats all I hear is how they work. My spouse has tried to set up web pages etc for me to do. I cant concentrate, can only do a few minutes at a time with anything. I take care of the apt. cleaning, cooking, laundry , they dont have to do anything, thats the least i can do. Just feel like renting a car packing up and go, prob wouldnt get far tho lol
    sorry for the rant
    Love ya all
    Darlene
  2. Jen102

    Jen102 New Member

    they just don't know how hard you are trying at this moment! They would never tell a paraplegic that they could walk if they "just tried" so why can't they sympathize with your disability? Blessings. Jen102
  3. darvick

    darvick New Member

    Thanks Jen, its just so frustrating for them too. My brain is fried and everyone gets tired of having to remind me and repeat things to me. Spouse said she didnt sighn up for this, don't blame her
    Hugs
    Darlene
  4. barbinindiana

    barbinindiana New Member

    Sounds like you could use a vacation from the family. LOL. Wish people who are always telling us with CFS/FM how hard they are working could only know how hard we are working to just get out of bed, get a bath or shower, and feed ourselves. And little do they realize how the stress they put on us to do more cause us to be sicker and able to do even less.

    Three years ago I lived with a boyfriend that I explain all this to, and I told him about the crashes I've had. He said He understood and I shouldn't worry about it, but after we were living together, he pushed me to do more and more, and silly me, I tried hard to do everything he wanted until I ended up in a bad crash, and then he nagged me everyday to get up and do things I was unable to do. I finally had to make him move out so I could recover. The stress he was putting on me was only making me worse.

    I've decided that I'm just not well enough for anymore relationships. It's sad but true. Maybe you need to have your family read my post. Maybe if they can be made to understand they will be kinder.

    Barb
  5. louiesgirl2

    louiesgirl2 New Member

    I think I remember somewhere in the wedding vows, in sickness and health.....

    I will admit once I get up and get going I feel a little better, however, with that said, I work as a secretary and I have to get up and walk around, if I sit too long it makes it worse. So I get up, walk around and sit back down.

    My biggest thing is my skin feeling like it is on fire and even my clothes hurt.

    We are each individuals and different things work for each of us.

    Take care and God Bless
    Phyliss
  6. darvick

    darvick New Member

    barbinindiana ,georgiac
    I know what you mean, sometimes i feel i dont have anything left. I did share the spoon theroy to spouse. She has back problems etc, also worked her way off disability. she is a boat captain now and thats great ,,, I'm just not her. Oh the vacation thing would be great , but she hasent had one so guess im not allowed
    Hugs
    Dar
  7. NyroFan

    NyroFan New Member

    Darlene:

    My best adivice is is to get on a sleeping pad and get some rest. Maybe that will help you pull out of it.

    Feel better soon.

    nyrofan
  8. darvick

    darvick New Member

    Thank you I think i'll take my meds now and find my comfort place.
    xoxo
    Dar
    just being a baby
  9. blessedmom2four

    blessedmom2four New Member

    the people that say even though you are pucking your guts with a fever just get up and try to make dinner and wash dishes...

    i find it amussing now
  10. CockatooMom

    CockatooMom New Member

    Yeah, I'm about sick of that too!

    So you know what? I'm going to "try." I will try to make supper everynight and wash the dishes every night, and do all the laundry, and the grocery shopping, and let's not forget I HAVE to make it to the gym, and clean the house, and go to school full-time plus work at the hospital 2 days a week from 6am to 1pm, and spend 12 hours a day studying and doing homework!

    Let's just see how long it takes before I have a breakdown. My hubby acknowledges I'm in pain, but he thinks I can do more than I do, if I would TRY.

    I know I'm angry and resentful right now, but darn it, I'm NOT NORMAL!!! I'M SICK and I'm TRYING to take care of myself. But I guess I am not supposed to. So the heck with it. Maybe it will all be over with sooner.
  11. NancyMystic

    NancyMystic New Member

    Next time some jerk tells me I could if I'd TRY, I'm going to think to myself "what would Donnaeil do".

    Makes me grin just imagining it!

    Nancy

  12. CockatooMom

    CockatooMom New Member

    Thanks for the giggle!
    (note to self...purchase a cane)
  13. TAM

    TAM New Member

    Hi Darlene,

    I'm sorry sweetie, some people will always be like that, they just aren't able to comprehend the intense pain your in. The only way they would believe is if they suffered from it, and i'm sure they wouldn't like people to tell them that they wouldn't hurt if they tried.

    I bet you do feel like renting a car and taking off. I hope things get better for you, i hope your loved ones start being more supportive.

    I wish you better health and lots of happiness. Take care, Tammy.