I am so tired that I just can't think straight and I hurt so much

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by rosemarie, Aug 26, 2006.

  1. rosemarie

    rosemarie Member

    I have had more frightened this past week than I can stand. First is was Mom with the bad celluitis and needing IV anticitoics and then needing ot have it drained as it was full of infection.

    My Mom called to night and was so shaky sounding and she kept telling me that she was falling down and she went on that she kept falling down. Please take me to the hosptial so I did.

    AFter blood work and a IV started as she is dehryeheted , She had X-rays and a cat scan .The doctor came in and told me that her blood was way too thin from her coumidin and it looked like she had a mini stroke but there is no sign of any blood in her brain but she did have a comrpession fracture in her back about at her waist level.

    She needed to have FFP {Fresh Frozen Plasma} to thinken up the blood and stop the psooialbity of a mini stoke. And she was admited to the hospital after they gave her a shot of Daulidid {SP} I was told that it was much stronger than Mscontin but it did nothing to ease her pain.


    Before I left after filling out all the paper work for her they were giving her the FFp and will be giving her some Morphine too. And I Hope that it will help as she was hurting and had the hickups and it was makeing her pain worse. I don't know why it is that she is getting so sick so mcuh and I wonder if being on the anticitoics helped with making her blood too thin or maybe it was the staph infection that she had. And is still on antibitoics for.

    I hope that she will be ok soon and get better soon and take a break from being sick and getting infections as much as she had been getting them/

    There was no one i could call to nigh and have some support. As my daughter who lives with her is celebrating her 1st anniversary tonight and is out of town for the night and I knew If I called her she would want to come home asap and there is really nothing that she can do for MOM but let her rest, and my sister does not answer her phone.

    Fianlly I got hold of my hubby and he came up for a bit and then went home and I had to stay to fil out all of the paper work.

    I just don't know how much more I can deal with as I am the only one that knows what she takes and who the doctor is and her health history. MY brother and sister don't have a clue and he lives to far away and she is out of is being depressed. And drunk or stoned. So I don't get any help from her...

    MY youngest is a hours drive away and is expecting a new baby and has a 17 month old son and she could not come tonight but maybe latter today. MY other daughter is a nanny in CT so she can't come here to help with MOM but she is comming for labor day for a few days.

    I am so exhusted adn upset ,worried and I just am really scared about this and I know that her being 79 yrs old that MOm's health is not going to be getting any better any time soo. And things like this are going to happen more often and I will be the one to take her to the ER all the time.

    Thanks for letting me vent & whine and cry,
    HUGS,
    Rosemarie
  2. Fredericka

    Fredericka New Member

    Been there, and it's not easy in the least. My heart surely goes out to you.

    Took care of my Dad for a year before he passed away in April this year. After surgery, TIA's, strokes, then lung cancer. All the episodes in ER, so many of them...It is so hard on us, especially with these conditions.

    One thing I learned early on is to keep a printed sheet with the patient's name, address, social security number and a copy of all medicare/medicaid and other insurance cards - - and a complete list of all medications and doses they take - prescription AND over the counter, all of it. Keep this updated at all times. Also include the patient's current medical condition they're being treated for, or any pertinent medical history, medication allergies. Oh, and at the top of the page by patient's name, address and phone #, put their Doctor's name, address and phone number. Also include who has Power of Attorney, name and phone number. If the patient has an Advance Directive (that tells what to do if they can't speak for themselves & in the absence of a person with Power of Attorney) - - keep a copy of that in the envelope too, and also if they have a DNR order (Do not resusitate) - that goes in, too.

    This REALLY saves you on those ER trips when you can't remember your own name, much less the patient's info. Also, you keep TWO copies of this info in an envelope, keep it on the front of the refrigerator where the patient is staying. That is the first place paramedics look when they come to the house after someone has called 911.

    I also made extra copies of everything and kept a complete set for myself in my purse at all times. I actually kept two sets in my purse. The doctor ended up wanting copies, so I had them to just hand over.

    It was a lifesaver more times than I could count.

    This way you can rest a lot easier if you cannot be there for whatever reason and another relative has to take over.

    I hope this helps a little and good luck. Don't forget to take good care of yourself, too. This is the worst stress on us with these conditions.
  3. Marta608

    Marta608 Member

    Dear Rosemarie, Fredericka has given you excellent advice about keeping a written record of all you know about Mom's treatment and condition, who to give it to and where to keep it. I think we can all benefit from this information.

    The next important thing, as she also said, is to do what you can to take care of yourself. It's really out of your hands, remember. You can be there as you're able but as much as you'd like to, you can't make this better for your Mom. Rest when you can and after you've made out the writting info sheet, change your thoughts every time you find yourself dwelling on the situation. Instead think of a calm, safe place. Breathe deeply. Affirmations help me when things are out of my control - and when are they really not?

    "Everything I need to know is revealed to me. Everything I need comes to me. All is well."

    Hugs,
    Marta
    [This Message was Edited on 08/27/2006]
  4. Fredericka

    Fredericka New Member

    BUMPING for Rosemarie. How are you doing? I hope things are better for you. Big hugs to you.
  5. kaymac

    kaymac New Member

    Hope your situation will get better and if I lived near you I would gladly help out.

    I cared for my father with cancer and mother with COPD both before my dad died Dec 04 and moved in with my mother leaving my own family of 4 till she died in July 05, and I also tried working full time. It really got me down.

    But looking back, I would NOT trade it for nothing, it bonded me and my Mother so much. I did have Church family and neighbors to help, but the trips, dropping her off for a wheelchair, walking down the steps and up the steps after parking far off and going in, then pushing her all over, helping her dress, bathe,loading wheelchairs, etc....it literally left me in pain and frustration.

    My faith and friends and venting helped me pull thru. She is blessed to have you and you will indeed have extra stars in your crown!

    (((((hugs))))))))Take care,
    kaymac
  6. Fredericka

    Fredericka New Member

    Rosemarie, how is everything going now? Been thinking about you.
  7. tata1580

    tata1580 New Member

    Oh sweetie, this is a rough situation for you..I feel like
    kaymac wish I was closer to you so I could help you out...have an ill family member is rough enough without close support is really hard..

    Please know that I am thinking of you and your mother sending prayers your way..

    Please keep us posted on how you are doing!!!

    Love
    Tami
  8. NyroFan

    NyroFan New Member

    rosemaria:

    So sorry you feel the way you do. I hope you pull through this without major, major flaring.

    I will send kind words up to the stars for you.

    NyroFan
  9. Pianowoman

    Pianowoman New Member

    Just sending some good thoughts to you. I'm sorry that you are having such a hard time. Perhaps you will get some relief from family coming this weekend.

    Take Care
    Kathy
  10. gumama

    gumama New Member

    I am so sorry your having to do all of this by yourself.. but I understand.. I just placed my 88 yr old Mother in an nursing home the first of this year, after having her with me for 16 months.... I also have a very ill husband who has been sick for 14 yrs.. and I had the fulltime care of both of them by myself.....

    I understand your pain and frustration......May I offer some suggestions to you.... if your Mom doesn't have a Medic Allert bracelet or neckless I would get her one... if for any reason she is alone and can't get YOU.!!! she could call for help herself and they could call Medic alert.. secondly.... write all her medications and medical history on the computer and save it.... print out copies and put with the other Emergency info....

    when you take her to the hospital or have to call 911.. at least you can hand them all of that info and you don't have to try and remember evrything when your under so much stress....

    any memeber of the family that would be taking care of her such as your daughter should also have a copy... Believe me I really do know how you feel... its very difficult being the caregiver.. were always giving to everyone else and not taking care of ourselves... but we have to find time to do that, because of the illness we have.

    my thoughts and prayers are with you, and I hope things settle down for you and your Mom soon.

    God Bless

    gumama
  11. 69mach1

    69mach1 New Member

    i swear when i am feeling low you are right there w/me...

    i am so darn sorry we all have to go through this crap...

    big hugs to you i have to go take my ad and go wrap my elbow in ice so i can maybe do my homework for tuesday...and just plain old read..make note cards..

    jodie
  12. Fredericka

    Fredericka New Member

    B - for Rosemarie