I am SO very nervous about tomorrow!!!!!!!!

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by kadywill, Sep 24, 2002.

  1. kadywill

    kadywill New Member

    Tomorrow is the dreaded "liver doctor" appointment. I have no clue what to expect and I broke down and told my husband about the appointment, even though I said I wouldn't, 'cause I REALLY didn't want him to go to this appointment with me. I just COULDN'T keep this big of a secret from him~~~he KNEW something was making me nervous, so I had to tell him. Well, he INSISTS on going with me like I KNEW he would. So, we have to be there at 9:eek:o a.m. in the morning. I am afraid that the doctor will be mean and my husband will kill him, OR that my husband will try to tell the doctor that I don't eat right and I don't exercise enough and that I worry about everything and I take too much medicine and I don't pray enough..............all of which is true, but I don't think HE should say it!!! As usual, I'm expecting to be told that it's all my fault that my liver enzymes have been sky-high for two years now! I hate to feel this way. Am I condemned to feel guilty about EVERYTHING I have or do???? Did I cause this DD anymore than my husband caused his Thyroid Disease or Graves Disease? I am actually afraid the doctor will say this. How do I know he won't be a masochistic you-know-what who believes this disease is all in my head? (can abnormal labs be psychosomatic???) This phobia goes way-back and I REALLY dread this appointment! HHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPPPP!
  2. kadywill

    kadywill New Member

    Tomorrow is the dreaded "liver doctor" appointment. I have no clue what to expect and I broke down and told my husband about the appointment, even though I said I wouldn't, 'cause I REALLY didn't want him to go to this appointment with me. I just COULDN'T keep this big of a secret from him~~~he KNEW something was making me nervous, so I had to tell him. Well, he INSISTS on going with me like I KNEW he would. So, we have to be there at 9:eek:o a.m. in the morning. I am afraid that the doctor will be mean and my husband will kill him, OR that my husband will try to tell the doctor that I don't eat right and I don't exercise enough and that I worry about everything and I take too much medicine and I don't pray enough..............all of which is true, but I don't think HE should say it!!! As usual, I'm expecting to be told that it's all my fault that my liver enzymes have been sky-high for two years now! I hate to feel this way. Am I condemned to feel guilty about EVERYTHING I have or do???? Did I cause this DD anymore than my husband caused his Thyroid Disease or Graves Disease? I am actually afraid the doctor will say this. How do I know he won't be a masochistic you-know-what who believes this disease is all in my head? (can abnormal labs be psychosomatic???) This phobia goes way-back and I REALLY dread this appointment! HHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPPPP!
  3. Shirl

    Shirl New Member

    Wow, are you beating yourself up! Just calm down, take the nice husband with you, and stop stressing yourself.

    I am sure nothing can be as bad as you are making it right now.

    Here something I try to live by; Don't cry over the past, you can't change it; Don't worry about the future, its out of your control; so, that leaves today, just chill out and enjoy today!

    Good luck, and blessings going your way.

    Shalom, Shirl
  4. kadywill

    kadywill New Member

    can you tell that I had a rough couple of days at work and I'm obsessing about this appointment? They are never as bad as I think they'll be and I know what you're telling me is true, but I DO so dread telling "the story" all over again to a new "stranger!"
    Thanks for the reply~~~
    Love,
    Kady
  5. garyandkim

    garyandkim New Member

    that great concerned hubby. Keep those bad sinerioes out of your head. Think good ones instead. Take care, Kim and Gary
  6. cpalance

    cpalance New Member

    I think I picked up on the part you are most worried about, "your husband." I have one of those, I know he loves me but sometimes he just can't keep his mouth shut when he should. Just ask him to please don't embarrasse you at the appointment tomorrow. The first time I said that to my husband he was in shock. He did pout a little, but I finally had the nerve to tell him I can handle it. Things have gone alot smoother although he does forget sometimes and I have to remind him. I won't take the blame anymore for things that are out of my control.
    I am sure the appointment will go fine. Hopefully the doctor can help you get things under control as far as your liver goes and you won't have to worry about the unknown anymore. I haven't completely given up on the medical community - he might end up being a very nice caring person. So think positive, tell your husband you can handle things and ask him not to embarrasse you. Please let us know how it goes.
    And like Shirl says, enjoy today and don't worry about tomorrow.
    Lots of Hugs
    Cindy
  7. kadywill

    kadywill New Member

    I'm tired and anxious and in a lot of pain tonight......
    you're right~~my husband IS my chief concern!
    Love,
    Kady
  8. MicheleF

    MicheleF New Member

    I was so stressed about my 1st appt w/ my rheumy I prob. only slept 1-2 hours. I just knew he was not going to believe in fms, he was going to want to send me to a psychiatrist, he was going to tell me (when I changed scenarios & had him believing in fms!) that it was my fault for not exercising & drinking too much caffeine, etc etc
    I cut my leg shaving in the morning, cause I was literally shaking w/ nerves over this.

    Well, 85% of the things we worry about don't come true, & sure enough he was wonderful! He was thorough, caring, & put me at ease. Here's hoping your experience is the same & your hubby doesn't say anything that you're thinking he will.

    Let us know how you make out, take care, & remember being tense makes the pain worse...Michele