I don't even want to get better

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Hootie1, May 28, 2008.

  1. Hootie1

    Hootie1 New Member

    This was a surprising post title but sometimes I feel this way! I have been sick for so long that I feel scared to get better. I think I fear that I will get sick again and I will have to explain all over again the illness to people who do not understand it!
  2. ladybugmandy

    ladybugmandy Member

    hello. i can sort of understand how you feel...but if you are careful, you can lessen the liklihood of a relapse when you do improve.

    since i have had it so long and have forgotten what it was like to feel well.....it is a little scary when i think of trying to pick up the pieces of my life...to date again..maybe study....work...go out...meet people. it is all pretty daunting.

    i remember my old self..i was pretty depressed..had bipolar disorder..but the brain fog muted all my feelings. it could be bad when they return!

    still...anything is better than being sick like this!

  3. momof471

    momof471 New Member

    I think we have been hurt by these illnesses besides the pain. We withdraw from others and are isolated.

    I know I tend to really get stressed out when I know I'm going to be around others. I couldn't imagine having to work!

    Not to mention that others have been less than kind to us, so we want to protect ourselves.

    I think its natural to be scared, but if we get better, I'm sure we will adapt with time and be kinder more compasionate people as a result.

    God Bless
  4. ladybugmandy

    ladybugmandy Member

    if i get well, i will probably be 40 or more. having lost so many years, i think it will be hard trying to decide what to do with my life at that stage.

    i will be at a different stage from most of me peers. i was not able to grow emotionally and intellectually for over 15 years.

    i plan to try to get therapy if i can...

  5. frosty77

    frosty77 New Member

    Guess it depends on lots of factors. I'm in my 40's and have had this all my life, so I have no clue what feeling good is like. IMO, those that have had this for a few years can easily remember what it's like to feel good and, therefore, strive harder to get well.

    You can't miss what you've never had, so I really don't miss feeling well as I have no clue what it feels like. Which makes having DD easier IMO.
  6. doloresf1

    doloresf1 New Member

    I've been sick and isolated for so long that I'm afraid of people. The thought of a social situation just makes me cringe!

  7. MsE

    MsE New Member

    And that would include the stress of another life change if you got better. Makes sense to me that wellness could be sort of scary. Wonderful, but scary.
  8. rickj44

    rickj44 Member

    I was better for two random days many years ago, I woke up and felt great,, went to work..and i just felt so free. My legs didnt feel heavy and it was such an overwhelming feeling i cryed.
    I usually work 8 yrs, i stayed and worked 12 yrs... got home and did some things around the house, went to bed got up the next day and i was back to where i was before. My legs where heavy and i felt terrible.

    Its just like somebody turned the Fibro switch back on. This happen to me twice, in the early stages.. such a tease. I can remember it like it was yesterday.

    I compare myself to a Car>> let 1/2 the air out of your tires and take out 1 spark plug and that about how i feel..

    Feel like i am carrying somebody on my back. I long for the healthy days, but after 12 years with this illness there wont be anymore of those good days.

    What scares me more is just added health issues, that happen as you get older.. This illness is enough to handle, i hate the thought of getting something else on top of this.

    And i am loosing my ability to walk so that is going to cause problems on its own.If my legs didnt bother me so much i would be walking everyday as much as i could.