I don't feel too good

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Shelbyeatenton, Feb 23, 2006.

  1. Shelbyeatenton

    Shelbyeatenton New Member

    I feel about ready to give up. I feel so poorly today. Among other things my stomach hurts, my heads swimming and and the (already severe) pain has taken a whole new level.

    My mum and boyfriend, well ex-boyfriend (its all so complicated) wanted me to see the doctor. They tried to arrange a home visit but i pleaded with them not too.

    It will sound ridiculous but i felt like i didn't want to be a bother. I felt and feel terrible but am tired of being a burden.

    I have pretty much lost my independance now. Something i've ALWAYS fought for. I'm a burden to all around me. I can't leave my flat without help as i'm in a wheelchair and there are steps. (the council are putting a ramp on but its taking so long.)I've been so patient.

    I couldn't go far at all if i got out, but at least i had the choice, you know?

    Something else that is really upsetting me is my birthday. It was on 28th January. Going for a meal. It had been planned weeks in advance. These things have to be as you well know.

    I had been so looking forward to it. My birthday was on a saturday. On the Monday i had an epileptic fit. One of the side effects i suffer with the fits is memory loss.

    This time it was quite substantial. I couldn't remember my birthday. Only tiny little snippets. Everyone has been telling me all about it. Trying to jog my memory.

    I know moving on should be the main focus, i just feel so angry. Why wasn't i allowed that one day? As if trying to cope with this DD isn't enough, and everything else being thrown my way at this time, why couldn't i just have tht one day of relief. A day where a light could shine through?

    Maybe this stress im putting on myself wont help me get better now, but i don't know how to feel different?

    I really don't feel well at all.

    Thank you for listening,
    Shelby
    xxx
  2. claudiaw

    claudiaw New Member

    I'm sorry you are having such a hard time.
    I know exactly how you feel. I don't want to be a burden either.
    But in order to get better ( or at least some relief from pain,etc.) you have to let people help you.
    You need to allow the doctor to help you.
    The more you resist help, the worse off you'll be.
    You deserve better than that. Take care of yourself ( and let other's help you) YOU ARE WORTH IT!:)
    Claudia
  3. Cromwell

    Cromwell New Member

    I am a bit tired but wanted to send Hugz.

    Love Anne C
  4. 69mach1

    69mach1 New Member

    just keep plugging in there...try try again...

    jodie
  5. Shelbyeatenton

    Shelbyeatenton New Member

    Thank you so much for your continued support.

    does anybody have any advice they could give me about increasing my independance?

    Thank you again for the kind words,

    I will agree to see the doctor tomorrow.

    Shelby
    xxx