I don't know how much more I can take...venting

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by halo52208, Apr 2, 2006.

  1. halo52208

    halo52208 New Member

    I have worked three days straight, eight hours each one. My pain is getting worse and it takes everything out of me(fms). Then to make things worse, today took forever to get over with. My husband wanted chinese and for me to also stop at a store to get a bath tub stopper. I hate running errands after work because I can hardly walk my feet hurt so bad(I'm a cashier), but I did it.

    So when I got home he got mad that I got the wrong part. I told him that the box said that was the part he wanted. I didn't call to confirm on me cell because I left it in the car and there was no way I could get it. So I told him next time he can get it himself. He didn't believe me that the box at the store said that was the part. Then he complained that he wanted crab rangoons and not egg rolls. He also complained that I got the wrong cherries for the cheesecake that my youngest son made. I didn't even know they came packed in water.

    I lost it and told him I am not bringing him nothing home again. They sell the chinese at my work(grocery store). He said we wouldn't be able to take a bath without the part, whatever. I wasn't going to take one, but I was so upset and angry, I took one. He forgot that we can plug up the stopper. I didn't even want to get out of the tub. I locked both doors so no one could come in. I didn't want to talk to anyone.

    But just a short while ago he was putting our oldest son down. He expects everyone to be perfect, and our son has ADD. He is in the Army now and is going to Iraq in August. I told him that if something happens to him, he wasn't going to his funeral. He adopted the two boys when they were little, they are from my first husband. James(son) and Denny(dh) don't see eye to eye. Dh was mad that I said that and got mad at me and told me to f off. That upset our daughter, but he didn't care.

    This year hasn't started off very good for us. I almost kicked him out two months ago. Been married 16 yrs this july if we make it that far. I am so fed up with the crap that goes on.

    When I started this post, I felt like giving up on life. I haven't felt like that in years. No, I'm not thinking of ending my life. Just feel like ending our relationship.

    I realized that about a month ago that I beat my depression. I was so happy about that because I had it pretty bad growing up. It runs in our family. But I have no fight left, because I can't fight off my pain anymore. I had to grocery shop after work last night. I had to use the electric cart.

    I have even been thinking of a cane, but have seen other post how it hurts their arms and shoulders. I don't need that, I already have problems with my shoulder. I have had my collar bone put in several times. Gave up trying to fix it, no one can find anything wrong(lots of xrays).

    Well I better cut this off so it's not so long. I guess I just needed to vent. Because I do feel better. But I'm still not talking to the jerk.

    Thanks for listening. Your ears are great medicine and cheap. :)

    Halo
    [This Message was Edited on 04/03/2006]
  2. halo52208

    halo52208 New Member

    I had to use the electric wheel chair at walmart the other night. I just can't be on my feet for long periods. I fear I too am headed for a permant wheel chair for shopping.

    Thanks for your response.

    Halo
  3. neen85

    neen85 New Member

    Sounds like your collar bone is not stable. You may have luck with somebody that does prolotherapy or sclerotherapy (both are the same thing). I have had this done to tighten up a loose joint/ligament and it works well and greatly decreases the pain. Daneen
  4. 69mach1

    69mach1 New Member

    and my advice is: seek some legal advice if you can, in regards to child/spousal support....now that he adopted those other children he will be liable for support until they turn 18 plus any other children....

    get a plan going just in case...

    go to library and look for legal books for your state laws in regards to divorce and settlement and child support.....

    it isn't easy to do it but it will give the upperhand...

    you may not be able to get him to change his ways to emotionally support you...but you can learn to be selfish for you so you get your own emotional support....

    like lock that bathroom door and take a glass of red wine in there, nice bubble bath and candles...and just soak....

    that will make you feel temporarily better...then think of more things you like to do...maybe going to get a manicure....

    jodie