I dont know whats wrong with me{mental}

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by willruthie1965, Jul 31, 2008.

  1. willruthie1965

    willruthie1965 New Member

    I have some mental health issues. When I was 5 my brother died,he was the oldest of 9. A few months later We had a house fire.I found out when I was 18 my brother set the house on fire, he was only 8.

    I have always worried.I Could barely go to school,I was afraid my mom would die or the house was on fire. There was something not right in my family. WE felt close then but why would an 8 yr old boy set the house on fire?

    I feel out of place. I worry about things too much! WHy did all this happen? WOuld I be normal if these events didn't happen? Write more later.

  2. Iam1ShadyLady

    Iam1ShadyLady New Member

    I just started a few months ago, and I didn't realize how many things from my childhood was still bothering me all the way into my adulthood. Once you start peeling the scabs off you do feel better. Maybe there are things bothering you that you don't even realize. I hope it works out for you.


  3. willruthie1965

    willruthie1965 New Member

    Thank you. Yes he did it on purpose. I feel he was teased alot and my mom was to depressed to notice or care.

    Even now my thoughts are not focused. I worry about my son who drinks too much.He is 26 and I don't know what to do. I feel it is probably my fault for his drinking problem. I don't know why I feel this way.I think if I gave him enough love he woudn't be so unhappy and drink so much.I have even asked him if he felt safe and loved as a child and he said "are you kidding me", of course. Ruthie
  4. CKater

    CKater New Member

    I came from a large "disfunctional" family too. Lots of issues and have had depression for most of my adult life. Like you I was a worrier and many days I literally couldn't go to school either- couldn't put my finger on it like you could, but nevertheless same thing. I take medicine to control my "mental illness", and whether we like the name or not that what it is and it's a disease. By and large just like FM/CFS, whether they only call this a "disorder" or not. It's interesting that you say your 26 year old drinks you blame yourself, and wonder if you gave him enough love as a child. My have a 25 year old. He doesn't drink, but I often wonder with both my kids if I gave them enough love as children..wondered if I knew how to based on how I myself was raised I don't think my parents knew really how to cope with that many kids, and they weren't exactly raised in the "Cleaver" household either. I think sometimes we all think we were shortchanged in that way particularly if we feel a disconnect emotionally and dont' feel we're capable or loving people enough including ourselves. Have you tried therapy, I think it would help you tremendously. The things you talk about weren't your fault but you definitely carry them around as though they are. Sorry for being so long winded Ruthie...you just spoke so directly to me....I'm just choked up here. God Bless you. Carrie