My family hates me & they don't take my condition sereously. I find myself up all nite crying and sleeping all day. I know I can beat this with the proper resources and I have a very good plan but I can't seem 2 get it off the ground. They don't help & they don't care. I HAVE NO ONE! I don't wanna kill myself or anyone else I jus wanna be happy at least okay. I am so alone except 4 the children & they kno something is wrong but I don't take it out on them. They make me smile & laugh but I should be making them smile & laugh instead I'm battling depression all alone. I HATE being this way I don't even kno how I got like this or why. I tried medication & it made it worse. I even got a book on bipolar & it talks about different activities but I jus can't get 2 them or even afford sum of them. Idk what 2 do. I don't wanna be sad like this. I wanna LIVE LOVE & LAUGH!