I feel completely hopeless and upset....

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by BEARANDBUGSMOM, Aug 15, 2006.

  1. BEARANDBUGSMOM

    BEARANDBUGSMOM New Member

    I feel soo terribly upset right now and have been all

    day...I am a stay at home mom and we barely make it. I

    just can't seem to keep track of anyhting and I don't feel

    like doing anyhting the only thing I can do is take care

    of my children everyday. I'm tired, I have weird pains

    here and there it seems like something new everyday and I

    can't calm myself down. I am terrible at keeping up with

    the bills and seems like I always have been but it's only

    getting worse I am looking at my bank account which is

    going in the crapper and we don't get paid for another

    week and a half. I have tried to pray as much as possible

    today, which I so often forget to do. I just really

    needed to talk to you guy's. I need to get a part time

    job but I don't think that I can. I feel like I'm going

    to have a terrible panic attack...

    Thanks so much.....AAARRRHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Kelly

  2. Busyknitter2

    Busyknitter2 New Member

    Sorry that you are having such a tuff time of it. You are still doing the most important job, caring for your beautiful children.

    I understand how you are feeling, I just realized that I have not paid the bills for this month, because I forgot. I use to remember everything thing. My husband use to say, "you never forget anything."

    It sounds like you are under alot of stress right now, and that is not helping how you feel.

    My son and Granddaughter where in a wreck yesterday, and I freaked out. Thank the good Lord that they are both ok. Needless to say I have felt worse today than usual.

    Keep praying, and I will keep you in my prayers.

    God bless, Pam
  3. tata1580

    tata1580 New Member

    All I can tell you my dear is what I have to do some times and it makes me feel so much better is just give it to God..tell him you can't handle the load anymore, you trust he will carry and take care of you.

    It takes a great weight off every time I do it...but I am bull headed so I usually wait till I just can not deal with the situation any longer...something I need to work on!

    Thinking of you tonight
    Tami
  4. 45down

    45down New Member

    the being so exhausted it's hard to breathe really sounds like what one of you is saying.
    It was so wierd hearing -my son and granddaughter were in a wreck- THE SAME THING happenned to me two weeks ago. No one was hurt (thankful), but I'm sure it's contributed to my being so down and crying so much the past couple of weeks.
    Sometimes I think all we can do is put one foot in front of the other (when we can) and trudge on. I'm really tired of that/this.
  5. 45down

    45down New Member

    I just found this site, so forgive me if I breach etiquette. I'm also feeling pretty hopeless about this whole mess.

    Also, what does PWC stand for?
  6. PianoGirl

    PianoGirl New Member

    Sorry to hear that you are feeling the way you do.

    I feel like I am in the same boat as you. I used to work full time, 40+ hours per week, now i'm lucky to be able to handle 10-15 hours. Our finances are a wreck. I forget to pay bills, sometimes we just don't have the money to keep up with them.

    The best thing you can do with your children is show them every day that they mean the world to you and that you love them very much. They are not going to care how much (or how little) money you have.

    Venting is always a good thing and I've found it is a bit of a stress reliever. If you ever need to vent, let me know, i'll be a strong shoulder for ya!!!

    Hang in there

    Lisa
  7. jinlee

    jinlee Member

    I am laying here at midnight wondering how to pay the pile of bills. I asked my hubby if he would take them over but he wont so well, I guess I will do like in the old I Love Lucy Show. She threw the stack of bills up in the air and the ones landing face up, she paid.

    I understand your frustration and that only adds to your pain, fatigue, etc. I wish I had an easy answer for you but if I did, I then would be able to help myself!

    I will say a prayer for you and keep you in my thoughts. Just remember that your kids are the most important thing. They need their mom and her love. My son is 22 and is getting ready to leave to Taiwan to teach at an English cram school. His girlfriend lives over there so he is quite on cloud nine. But the point is, I stayed home and we went without and it was such an opportunity others did not have to be able to witness all his firsts and be there for him. They grow up so fast and then are gone. But I feel because I was there, he was able to go farther and achieve greater things than if I had worked and left him to a babysitter.

    Maybe you could find something you could do from home that would bring in some extra cash. I used to type for college students, babysit, etc.

    Make yourself some alone time each day to just take a long bubblebath and read a good book.

    Are you on any meds to maybe help calm you so things don't seem so overwhelming. If not, that may help or even some of the herbs.

    Take it one day at a time and know we are probably all in the same boat with you, rowing against the current!
  8. sues1

    sues1 New Member

    This will not help you right away. I know that there must be more going out at times then coming in. I really do understand.

    But to gain control....get a tablet.....put Month and year
    at the top of a page....like August 2006
    Under date (example):

    Rent
    Gas
    Electric
    Cable
    Phone
    credit card

    List all....do not forget months that you have to pay car insurance or such.

    When you pay each...write amount/date pd./check number after each and put a check mark in front on each one you have paid.

    As bills come in, say a water bill that is to be paid by 8/26/06.....write that date large on front of that envelope.
    Keep all bills together in a basket along with stamps and extra envelopes and your tablet (cheap ledger). Pens.

    Always remember that it take a while for a bill to arrive to who ever you send it to in the mail.

    You can look at this anytime and know where you are for each month.

    I write medical expenses on the back of each page for easy referral.

    Magazine subscriptions, club dues, even oil changes for your car.......you can easily look back to see what you have paid or when something will be due later on.

    It does not bring in any more money into the house hold. But it does help you to get some control and you can eventually relax more.

    You might find some things you can cut out, like cablevision for a while, or news paper. You will see that if you think you have a few extra dollars, check this list first. You might have a bill that needs paid instead.

    You are the most important thing in your children's life. Any thing that can help you relax will make you feel better. Tension creates more problems with us for sure.

    Count your blessings....we all have more than we sometimes see.

    Gentle Hugs and Blessings............Susan
  9. kellyann

    kellyann New Member

    Hi Hon,
    Take a deep breath and try to relax a little, haha! I know it is so hard to do! Sue had some excellent suggestions! I think I try her method myself. I also have a hard time keeping my bills organized in order to be paid. Always the most important is your rent or morgage payment. I have found it makes paying bills easier to do it online too. That way you have no checks to write, no mailing, it is very simple, haha!


    Kelly I hope you are feeling better and you calming down some by now. Oh, by the way, I like your name!
    Kellyann
  10. kellygirl

    kellygirl Member

    Well, I still am in debt, but am 53 now. I got sick when I was still a young mother. I had mono, too. I look back and wonder how I got through it all. My family did not belive me and kids don't think parents get sick. It was a lot of frustration and anger back then.

    Eventally I was able to try "work", and started very slowly. It was a home-health agency where the person in charge of hiring also had FMS. I was just led to this place, don't know why. She gave me easy cases and as little or more hours that I wanted. The rest is history.....

    Over the years, with determination I have been able to keep progressing and doing more. I am not cured, but am a functioning person again. I don't suffer the extreme panic attacks like I use to, either.

    I think that by nobody helping me and doing it for me, it forced me to find my own way. For me, it was either lay there and die or survive. Anger was a good motivator for me. I was led to professionals and other persons with CFS/FMS that have helped me along the way.

    I am not a survivor anymore, but an Overcomer.

    These boards are a step in the right direction.

    I wish you the best. You can do it.
  11. BEARANDBUGSMOM

    BEARANDBUGSMOM New Member

    Just wanted to take a moment to thank all of you, I just read all of your responses and I feel better today! Thanks so much again for all of your love and support, I really appreciate it, you all are always there when I need you!

    (((hugs))))
    Kelly
  12. NyroFan

    NyroFan New Member

    Kelly:

    Hang in there! You are not broke and it is just some little more time before you need to do bills.

    You are taking care of your children and that is a job in itself.

    Have faith and hang in there. I am right here for you anytime.

    nyrofan