I feel so blah

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by rosemarie, Jun 28, 2003.

  1. rosemarie

    rosemarie Member

    I am soooo tired all the time and I really hate this feeling that my whole body is heavy . My arms and legs feel as if they have wieghts in them or as if I had really exercised and overdid it. I am so tired of always hurting and of having no one at home or in the town I live in understand what fibro is. I can't exlpain it to them . I get but you don't look sick or what can we do do help you ? Pay for my doctors visits and for my meds and understand when I tell you that I sleep till noon and don't judge me because of it.I get grief from family because I can't stay asleep at night so when I finally go to sleep I don't wake up till noon, and you know that Mothers are not to do that we are to be up and ready for the day at the crack of dawn. So ok I don't have a job and can't get it through the family and husband ( who once he files for divorce will be a ex. but he has not done that yet so ) I was first told that I had myalgia then it went to fibromyalgia and then the back pain got so bad that I had a MRI and it was discovered that I have two dics that are bulging L4-5 and S1. My legs have been hurting so bad that I could scream and yes it is that bad even with all the pain meds that I take. I have a pain in the butt it then travels on to my right thigh down to the knee ( it really hurts there my rt knee is deterating) and on to my ankle( I broke it about 6 yrs ago and if you touch it just right I can tell you exactly where it was broken, just hairlind fractures). I want my life back I want to find a job and go to work so that my husband don't have to support me and if he wants out of our marriage then go, if I were working he would do it but because I don't find a job in his eyes I am faking this pain stuff fibro is just an excuse so that I don't have to find a job clean house exercise ect . I don't like living this way. I hate it that I hurt all the time that if you were to touch the small of my back it would cause really intence pain, if you were to touch me in anyone of the 18 tender points I would cry because they HURT so bad.
    I am so sorry that I am gripping at you all I just can't take this anymore . I want to feel like me but I think me got lost along time ago and I can't find her anywhere. Sorry for the whineing.Rosemarie
  2. Susan07

    Susan07 New Member

    Dear Rosemarie, I am so sorry you are having to face this alone. It must be terrible to have all the naysayers around. Have you printed any articles regarding FM to give to family members?

    I feel for you - hey, I'll bring the cheese since you have the wine! LOL

    Are you going thru a flare or is this current feeling "all the time" and since forever?

    I really wish you well-er and hope someone near you begins to understand or at least accept what you are going through. Otherwise there is US and we'll be here for you.
  3. taylorat

    taylorat New Member

    I feel the same way. I am sotired of hurting all the time and I am the same way the pain meds my Dr. gives me does nothing for my pain . I am working now but I really have no choice my husband was let go from his job and I am the only one working. Sometimes I don't know if I can get through another day. The pain is almost to much to bear.People with out this pain just cannot understand what we have to go through every single day. I wake up in pain and go to bed in pain. I wouldn't know what it would be like not to be in pain. I wish I could have just a few minutes without it It would be the happiest few minutes of my life.My lower back,legs, and feet hurt me so bad all the time. And then I am so tired like it takes all my energy to just get up. people who do not have this cannot know how lucky they are . Everytime my husband looks at me like I aam crazy and tells me how in the world can you hurt all the time I just wish he could walk in my shoes for just one day and then he would understand it when I tell him how much I hurt and how tired I am. I really don't see how I make it to work everyday Sometimes I just want to call it quits and do what I know I need to do for myself and try to get my disibility even if it takes a long time. I am sorry you hurt so bad Believe me I understand how you feel maybe sometime a miracle will happen and we won't have to hurt anymore.
    Alberta