I feel so out of control

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by angeljoe, Jan 14, 2006.

  1. angeljoe

    angeljoe New Member

    I am having foot surgery on Wednesday the 18th (my hubby's b-day) and my doc said I would be down for 8 - 10 weeks. I am the one that does all the cleaning and cooking. My kids are so use to me jumping up to take care of them. My son is 10 and can do most things for himself now. My daughter is 3 and she is a total Mommy's girl. I really don't know how my husband will manage all of this. Since dealing with Fibro and Chronic fatigue so long I have learned to do housework a little at a time. I do like to keep it picked up but my hubby is on the lazy side when it comes to cleaning. Ok enough of that. My children are a big concern of mine. I feel so bad my surgery is on my hubby's birthday but I worry so much my kiddos will have a hard time without me being their taxi, chief cook and bottle washer. I will have help at home for the first three days. After that I'll be alone with my 3 year old until 4pm. I just needed to get this off my chest I guess. Thanks to all for reading and listening.
    Angela
  2. atiledsner

    atiledsner New Member

    Even a 3 year old can and will be helpful.They can do a lot more than we think.It is important to let them know you need them.I have learned that all doesn't have to be done perfectly.Take this time to rest and heal as much as you can.Can you do this just for you?Hugs to you.
  3. russiankids3

    russiankids3 New Member

    First off I'd like to send good thoughts and prayers your way. Surgery is never easy and if you are stressed out it could be even more difficult.

    I was in a similar situation a few years ago. Had pneumonia and was hospitalized for 8 days. At the time my husband was alone with our two sons whom we had just adopted from Russia. They were such a handful and mean to boot! We have no family where we are living so that wasn't an option. Like you, I handled most of the work at home and the boys really depended on me as I spoke Russian and dear ole dad didn't.

    Well, we made it through. Yes, the house was a mess, the kids clothes did not match when they came to visit me at the hospital, my youngest just cried and whined for me all the time, and my husband was super stressed-out!!! I was at home with my little guy after discharge from hospital and suprisingly--he wasn't so bad to deal with.

    You are a good person and a wonderful mother I can tell because you put your family first and worry about their welfare. It is not easy to concentrate on yourself exclusively, but you will heal and feel better faster if you could do so just for a little while.

    As for your 3 yr. old--I've always found it interesting how kids know intuitively that Mommy is not well and modify their behavior so to help Mommy out. I hope this will work out fine for you. It is scary, but you WILL get through it. I'll be thinking of you.

    Best wishes for a speedy recovery.
    Hugs,
    Sue
  4. russiankids3

    russiankids3 New Member

    Just looked at your profile--we are neighbors!!! I live in Franklin, Indiana. You look like one of the kids yourself! Cute pic.

    If it gets too bad just send the kids packing to my place. My kids love company!!! I am also a pediatric nurse so I can handle them.

    Love,
    Sue