I gave up my career today.

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by karenatk, Feb 10, 2003.

  1. karenatk

    karenatk New Member

    Hello Everyone, well I resigned from my Business Operations Manger job today. I gave a 3 week notice. I am so tired of hurting from stress all the time. I hope I did the right thing. I am praying my family can survive with my husband's salary. The stress just got to be too much. I had no other choice. I think I just need to rest for awhile and then find a less stressful job. Please keep me in your prayers that somehow I will get better. Thanks to everyone for being there. Karen
  2. Dayle

    Dayle New Member

    Karen, That is really painful isn't it? I hope you will take time to relax & enjoy your family & your freedom while you're off work. There's no point in putting a different type of stress on yourself by worrying about something you can't control. Hopefully, you will have lots of good days ahead once you recover your strength. GoodLuck D.
  3. philsr

    philsr New Member

    Hi,
    First time posting. I am male, 42 yrs. I have had CFS, FMS since around 1993. Was diagnosed around 1997. Started very slowly and progressed to the point that I lost my job as a Salesperson Jan 20-03. My boss had been very helpful, but unfortunately, his business, much like many others these days, is going thru a bad time. I am scared to death. I don't know if I will ever be able to work and make a decent living again. I don't have any Ins. and can't get any thru my wife's job, yet(maybe soon). I don't have the support from my wife I would like to have, even though I have tried to educate her and she knows that it is for real. She can't seem to understand how bad it is getting. I am getting extremely depressed. I have already lost my house before I lost my job.

    Although I wouldn't wish this on anyone, it is nice to have a place to go and vent and see that there are others who understand.

    So Karen, I understand how you feel, as do many others.

    To everyone else,Thanks for your support, our kind need it. Phil
  4. dolsgirl

    dolsgirl New Member

    {{{{hugs}}}} to you. I'm so sorry that you're going through what you're going through. You might be in a better place at another time. My thoughts are with you. dolsgirl
  5. ozgran

    ozgran New Member

    It will be hard. I am much older than you and it is just my husband and I at home. He earns such a small income that both of us are on part pensions. When I retired 2 1/2 years ago, I was the biggest money earner and that has made a huge differnce to our plans. I had intended to work until late this year. BUT, we have coped and have no regrets. You just have to be very careful with the budget and say no to lots of things you did before. By the way, I did not know what was wrong with me while I was still at work, but falling asleep at the computer etc told me it was time to leave. Only found out about 2 months ago about the FM. Just want to wish you luck and I am sure without the pressure of work you will feel more relaxed and hopefully you will start to feel a little-or a lot- better. I will keep you in my prayers. Love and Hugs, ozgran.
  6. Pat UK

    Pat UK New Member

    and I was so upset, I was advised to resign as I was not able to do my job.Although it was a wrench at first I am now seeing the positive side and I am feeling better as a result of being home and resting. You will need to come to terms whith the problem which takes a long time also the lack of money, I hope you shine through eventually.
    Pat
  7. LErdman

    LErdman New Member

    I am 40 and have had FM since 1993. Left my office job of 19 yrs because of stress. My husband works all the overtime he can and tries to be understanding but I know he gets frustrated.

    It is hard because just about every Dr. I've seen said FM and CFS patients are usually perfectionists and very active before they are hit with this. Now I feel lazy and I do not think any of us are!

    Reading this board has really helped me too. I've told my husband that people with these diseases should all get together and live in our own community and work together as a group. By the looks of this board it would be a VERY LARGE community!

    LErdman
  8. LindaW

    LindaW New Member

    Hi Kare- I certainly understand may of the feelings you are having today I am much older than you andit has been a few years since I left my job because of this illness. We are now living on one paycheck and it is a challenge, but it all works out. The extras are gone now, but I do thank God when the pain gets out of control, I can sit, lay down or do whatever I can to feel better. You will be in my prayers
  9. EllenComstock

    EllenComstock New Member

    Hi, Karen:

    So sorry for the decision you had to make. I'm sure you spent a lot of time agonizing over this decision. I am currently working full-time as a secretary, but wonder if I will have to make this decision someday. Some days I feel pretty good and think I can still do this, but other days it's a real struggle to get through the day. Maybe you can do something less stressful on a part-time basis? Is there anything in your budgeting that you can cut out or cut down on? I'm sure you know you can always come here for support and a shoulder to cry on!

    Ellen
  10. northwoodssue

    northwoodssue New Member

    Hi Karen:
    I had to quit my job as an RN in l998, and it was very painful. As you do, I loved my job and was not ready to retire at all!!!
    I still miss it, but have adjusted to less money and less ability to do what I want and need to do. It takes a while to find this peace, but it will come.
    The bottom line is, we cannot work if we are in constant pain, and we shouldn't feel guilty over this. I know, I do feel guilty too, but get a reminder every time I try to normal activities of daily living.
    Give yourself a break, try new things you like to do (even something as simple as soaking in a tub for a long time, reading new novels, etc) and it will make you feel better.
    Remember, alot of us on this board are in the same boat.
    Good luck to you.
    sue
  11. LauraLea

    LauraLea New Member

    I gave up my career in a high stress sales related field about 2 years ago. Although it's been hard financialy, I am much healther now. We are starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

    I must say it was the right move for me. I'm sure it will be for you too. It's hard at first, but well worth it in the long run.

    Best wishes--Laura
  12. LauraLea

    LauraLea New Member

    I gave up my career in a high stress sales related field about 2 years ago. Although it's been hard financialy, I am much healther now. We are starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

    I must say it was the right move for me. I'm sure it will be for you too. It's hard at first, but well worth it in the long run.

    Best wishes--Laura
  13. BAGEL

    BAGEL New Member

    I'M SO SORRY TO HEAR THAT YOU HAD TO GIVE UP ON YOR CAREER. I HAVE ALSO BEEN UNALBE TO WORK A 9 TO 5 JOB AS WELL FOR CLOSE TO 10 YEARS NOW. I WOULD LIKE TO HELP YOU IF I CAN. CONTACT ME.
  14. pam_d

    pam_d New Member

    I think there are a lot on this board who have gone through this very hard decision & through tough financial times....but most seem to say that you learn to make adjustments & cope on a much smaller income, and that the rewards of being able to live with much less stress & pain seem to make all the difference. I wish you and your family well, and I hope you do get better enough to maybe consider a less stressful type of job.

    I will keep you in my thoughts & prayers!

    Hugs,
    Pam
  15. karenatk

    karenatk New Member

    Hello Everyone, Thank you so much for the love and support you wrote too me. It helps me so much to know all of you are there. You will never know what it means to me. I know in time I will feel better about this. I have worked since I was 20 years old and it will be an adjustment but I know with God's hand to guide me, he will work it all out. Thanks again. You all are wonderful.
  16. jolly

    jolly New Member

    Call me crazy, but I was glad for you when I read your post. What a relief it must be to finally give in and get the rest that you need. I wouldn't have said this five years ago, but I've changed my mind since then. Hopefully you will love your new life once you adjust to it and look back on all that stress as a distant memory. Jo Ellen
  17. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    I'm so sorry, but I think you did the right thing. By the time a person gets to this point, there is nothing else which can be done. If you were to continue, you might just become bedridden a good part of the time like I was two years ago. I worked until I could no longer get up and go to work. It has taken me all this time to claw my way back and I'm trying to decide what I'm going to do when I do try to return to work this summer at least part time.

    Love, Mikie
  18. pamela

    pamela New Member

    your immune system!!!!! Do not worry about others in the FAM getting along w/out your income. You all can do it...just cut out the extras and if you have credit cards that have large balances then do the consolidate thing. I know first hand what it is like to have a stressful job. I gave up my love of property mgt. years ago due to the stress. Actually I gave up working in high stress offices. The stress in the 80's and 90's really did a number on me and I think was the lead up to FMS and the pain/fatigue I then.... and now have. Best to you. Many hugs...Pamela
  19. Newswoman

    Newswoman New Member

    Karenatk,

    I also know what it's like to give up on a career. I so empathize with you. It took me months to decide to leave, but I did what I had to do for my health and my happiness. It may take some adjusting on your and your family's part, but you'll get through it.

    I wish you the best.

    Newswoman
  20. hideycat

    hideycat New Member

    I didn't have to quit my job - I was layed off. If was the best thing that happened. But it was to the point if I hadn't been layed off I would have had to quit. The lack of stress of working is almost as good as upping your meds! When the unemployment ran out I applied for disability. Was denied. Then got an attorney - reapplied and now recieve a monthly check.

    Any stress now throws me for a curve. Fatigue and pain. when my Mom passed away - the stress plus the heart ache was a huge burden to bear. But luckliy my husband is an angel.

    Hang in there. There is a lot to be said for naps when needed!


    [This Message was Edited on 02/12/2003]