I Have An Idea And Need Some Input?

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by pat460, Apr 20, 2007.

  1. pat460

    pat460 New Member

    Hey All,

    I've been thinking about how all of us with FM/CFS/ME have good and bad days. Also, I read a post from a member here who said he has no support and no one at all to turn to when he needs to pay bills, buy food, go to doctor, etc. and feels too bad to go out. So I started thinking( I've been told that's dangerous for the ones around me. lol)and putting it all together, then came up with what I think is one fantastic idea! Can you see the light bulb above my head? (ha ha) Why not start a support circle of sorts? For example; If you are having a good day but another member is having a bad one, yet has an important errand that needs to be done, then they can call you(or another member who's feeling o.k.)for help. Hopefully, members who have compassionate family members and children will get them involved as well. Then the ones who have no one would have even more help. How many of us have no one to mow the lawn, run the vacuum, take out the trash, and the list goes on. I know SSDI doesn't pay enough for us to hire these things out.

    So,what do you all think? Is this an idea that would get out of hand and take advantage of people? Or, is this an idea that would benefit all and keep some from feeling so alone? It may be best to begin with a small community or neighborhood group.

    Also, if you think this would work, how would one get it started? What would be the best way to find members who don't go to a support group and have no one to depend on? Could this really work or am I looking through rose colored glasses because I finally had a couple of good days?

    You see, I was thinking about ways to teach my girls compassion. They are great kids who already have sympathy/empathy for others but, I feel you can never have too much. I thought about taking them to a nursing home to adopt a grandma or grandpa who has no family. But then this idea hit me and I thought what a great way for them to see how "mom's sickness" affects others who have it, help people less fortunate, and just be a better person. With all the school shootings and violence in our society today, it seems like young people don't value life--murder has become too easy. I want my children to always have a conscious and to always listen to it.

    So what do you all think? Don't hold back. Please give me your honest opinion. Any suggestions on how to improve this idea would also be appreciated.


  2. jmq

    jmq New Member

    First of all, you are an awesome person and Mom. I love the idea. I am the type that finds it sooooooo hard to ask for help, but if I was able to help others on good days, I might not feel so bad about asking for help too. I just do not know how that could get started. I have soooo many bad days that I do not know how many good days I would have to contribute...but I love the concept. Lets hear what others say...

    Thanks for the post...
  3. leubie

    leubie New Member

    i think this is a great idea---- you are a great person/mom for thinking of this--------and sharing this------esp. for your children-------i would too like to know what others think----what would be the best way to start-----ive always wished there was a way to meet the fine people from this group-----one time suggested we start a fibro academy and we could all live together in a dorm!!!!-------talk about rose colored glasses!!!---lol!!!---------anyways---------lets keep this bumped-------------great thought---------take care -and love to all------------laura
  4. kellyann

    kellyann New Member

    It is a good idea except that we are not allowed to give out our personal information, so I don't know how that could work. Am I missing something here?

  5. pat460

    pat460 New Member

    Thanks for replying and for the encouragement. I have to admit I was a little nervous with this post and wondered if everyone would think I had gone nuts to even attempt something like this.

    Kellyann; All of us on the board are located far and wide so my idea wouldn't work for us as a group. What I was thinking was each person could start a support circle in their own neighborhood, county, town, or whatever term you use for your local area. For example; I live in a small town so I could start my support circle here then expand to other areas within driving distance as more members learn of the circle. Most of us couldn't contribute a lot of days per month but, as more members join more people could be helped, especially if healthy friends and family wanted to contribute.

    It would be great though if all of us here could at least meet someday.

    [This Message was Edited on 04/20/2007]
  6. momof471

    momof471 New Member

    That would be an awesome idea, making it happen is the thing. That would be great for my kids to be involved in to and know that their mom is not the only one and they are not the only kids going through this.
  7. obrnlc

    obrnlc New Member

    hi Pat,
    sounds like a great idea, do you have any support groups set up in your city?
    there is always the problem on one or two people that won't want to help out when they are up to it, but most would go for it, i think.
    you are a great role model for the girls!
    good luck--L
  8. pat460

    pat460 New Member

    You all are making me start to think I could really pull this thing off!

    Prickles; Any ideas how you are going to get yours started? We don't have any support groups for FM/ME in my small town so I could use some ideas.

    Anyone else have any thoughts on how to get this thing going? This is a very intelligent group so please give it some thought and let me know what you come up with.

    Thanks, Pat
  9. desertlass

    desertlass New Member

    I think you have a great idea.

    This would be like a neighborhood co-op type of thing, right?

    I've given this some thought, too, but haven't figured it out yet. We should talk about this on the chit chat board sometime, if you'd like?

    Good luck,
  10. Marta608

    Marta608 Member

    I'm in the same boat as the guy you quoted and I've been thinking (yes, I have) of putting an ad in the paper for a ....... and here I'm stuck.

    I need (inexpensive) help with housework like vacuuming and windows. My garage needs a good cleaning out and I also need someone occasionally to pick up something from the grocery store or the pharmacy or take me somewhere further than I now feel safe driving. I love the idea of us fellow CFSers helping one another out but could we? While there are many people here on the board with energy, none of them live near me and my energy level just doesn't allow me to run around with flyers or have meetings right now. Goooooooooo, Prickles, though. I swear that girl is going to run her country someday.

    A friend once suggested calling local churches; he said that they often have community service clubs or people who will be helpful for things like this but I feel awkward about doing that. I used to run some of these types of clubs! Ego needs cleaning out, I guess.

    I suppose we'd have to put an ad in the paper but what would we say? "Exhausted woman looking for other exhausted people so we can help each other on less exhausted days."?

    I think you're an awesome mom! I'll be watching this thread. Let's keep it bumped.


    Oh, right! It's probably off topic. Sometimes it's hard to tell.

    [This Message was Edited on 04/21/2007]
  11. pat460

    pat460 New Member

    this isn't considered off topic since it does relate to FM/CFS/ME but yes, it is hard to know whether a thread is o.k. or not.

    I just wanted to see if anyone else feels like contributing. I will think on all your replies tonight and post some thankyou comments tomorrow. Feeling exhausted right now.

    You all are the greatest!

    [This Message was Edited on 04/21/2007]
  12. desertlass

    desertlass New Member

    I just thought that since I didn't have any real plan to offer that my ramblings might be considered chatting.

    I think it's GREAT to talk about this, here!

    I think that tangible support is what we need as badly as healthcare.

    I always fantasize that we would all move to the same city for about a year, figure out how to get each other well, then we can all move wherever we like.

    If anyone figures out how to get this started, let me know. I did a support group for a while, and it was really hard to get people to come on a regular basis, including me! Just the drive alone tired some of us out. It really needs to be as big as you can get it, because there will usually always be at least half missing, and it's never the same half!

    Go, Prickles and Pat!!
    P.S I have a post called under my username called "Suggestions for Differing Opinions" if you want to peruse it. :)
  13. poeticbobbi

    poeticbobbi New Member

    I like the idea, but I am thinking ,we will definately need to recruit some healthy people into our circle.Because I am sure that like me,if you have a good day and then you over do, ya pay for it for days.All in all though it is a great idea.How to get it started aaah,duhh, I don't know.But if you or the others can figure out the gettin started part I'm all in....
  14. ritatheresa

    ritatheresa New Member

    There are many ways to go about it as far as I see.

    I'm a homecare nurse so your not far off at all. On a bigger scale you can look into not for profit agencies etc. I'm sure there are some websites that could be of help. Think of Meals-on-Wheels, God's love we deliver, those are food pantries that deliver lunch and dinner to seniors/homebound patients.

    Your idea is brilliant, your daughter's could help make flyers and stuff. You'd not only be teaching them compassion but also how to make plans for something and see it come to life.

    When I was younger we used to go dance in the nursing homes, it was a beautiful feeling for me even as a child, you could actually see people come to life.

    Your so right on, you got me thinking now, thank you:), Ritatheresa

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