I have one gem of a man!!

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Betsy2, Feb 21, 2003.

  1. Betsy2

    Betsy2 New Member

    My significant other is so understanding of this DD. He totally understands my whole situation and sympathizes. The reason I say this is because this morning he started chatting with me about how women with Fibro often accumulate large amounts of debt waiting for SSD to approve them. Then he started talking about how in many situations women don't have a caring mate and it makes it all the more difficult for a woman who has Fibro. He even sympathized with the women who ended up in divorce court because their mate could not or would not deal with this DD. This man is one in a million. He has always been there for me. He knows what it is like to live with a DD everyday because he himself has emphysema and has to have breathing treatments several times each day. God blessed me with a very special man and I appreciate him more and more every day. Nuff said.

    Betsy
    [This Message was Edited on 02/21/2003]
  2. northwoodssue

    northwoodssue New Member

    Hi Betsy:
    I'm so glad that you have an understanding man to support you. I am blessed too with a husband who supports me in this dd. When I first got dx'd with fms, he didn't quite understand it, but knew that I was in pain and couldn't do what I used to. I bought him the book, The Fibromyalgia Supporter, by Dr. Mark Pelligrino, and that book helped him understand completely this dd and it's effects on me and US. He felt included in this and has done his best to help me with all my problems.
    What a guy. God has blessed me too. I hear alot of negatives about spouses and families, and just wanted to acknowledge another wonderful man. Cause I know it isn't easy living with me and this DD, and he tries.......
    sue
  3. KarenL47520

    KarenL47520 New Member

    husband thank God. He tries really hard to understand all this and even though he said at times he feel so helpless as to how to help me, just knowing that he believes me when I say I am sick and in pain. That is more than I was getting from some of these jerk doctors before I was diagnoised.

    And another thing, he doesn't pressure me for sex when I am feeling bad. And that too is such a blessing. My late husband, it did not matter how bad I felt, how much I was hurting and how many times I would tell him please I feel too bad, I hurt too bad, he had to have it. It meant nothing to him that I would cry during and afterwards.

    Yup, I have kissed my share of toads and now I have my prince. That love and support means everything to me.
  4. EllenComstock

    EllenComstock New Member

    with a wonderful husband. It took him some time to understand what fibromyalgia is (as it did me), but he has been so understanding. My interest in sex isn't what it used to be, but he never complains. He helps me around the house by washing dishes and doing the laundry. Recently he said I should wait until the weekends to get groceries so he can help me at the store. I am still working full-time, but who knows how long I can continue to do this. I am hopeful that I don't get any worse. In the meantime, we are getting all the information we can about this disease and about filing for disability if and when the time comes. He was so wonderful on Valentines Day. I loved the flowers, but especially loved the romantic card in which he wrote he was so fortunate to be my husband. That made me feel so good as sometimes I feel bad like he is also a victim of this disease. It's times like this when you know if your marriage is strong or not.

    Ellen
  5. AnnetClo

    AnnetClo New Member

    I have a great husband too. He doesn't really understand FM yet, but then neither do I since I was just dx'd in October. But he understands that I'm not myself and that I'm in pain. He does all he can to help with the cleaning and cooking and shopping. Maybe it's because he has end stage renal disease and has to go for dialysis 3 times a week so he knows what it is to live with a chronic disease. We're both still working full time and I thank God every day for giving me this man to share my life with. It makes all the difference in the world.

    Annette
  6. motherjo

    motherjo New Member

    Hello, I Just had to say so to.I thank GOD for my husband.He has always been good extra good to me out of 33 yrs only 1 not so good just ok.That 7 yr inch.you know they say.But GOD has bless me with a carring and Understanding husband.He even gets up with me during the night ,when I cant sleep and I just love Him for it.Most of the time we are in pain we forget to say thank you for all they do for us.Just had to add my 2 cents . Thank you all for the help on the message board that has helped me.
  7. JaciBart

    JaciBart Member

    I too have a love for a hubby, he is the one thing I cherish above all else, I too have kissed my share of toads and I tell him 24/7 how much he means to me and he does also. I am truly blessed. I think somehow God has things figured out and I honestly do not know how I would have survivied this long with fibro (not even been a yr yet) without his unconditional love. He does not either expect me to have sex anymore, we tried to keep up the norm and it just was getting harder and harder on me and he is so thoughtful and truly loves me and cares about my comfort and he has pretty much accepted now that we may never have a sex life again, poor guy, I only met him a couple of yrs ago,, he was a 38 yo bachelor and he had never had a relationship before, a few dates here & there but never been even slightly interested in someone till we met, he was so moral and I respect that so much. He has taught me so much just by his goodness. I am glad for you others too, I wish all of us sufferers had that in our life, maybe we should start a spouse's board.

    Jaci
  8. RedB

    RedB New Member

    We just celebrated our income tax refund with a one-night stay at a motel in our favorite vacation town. We had such an urge to take a swim during this extra-cold winter! We enjoyed the swim, the hot tub, and a great dinner. Plus one more unmentionable.

    Kathy
  9. hideycat

    hideycat New Member

    I just read everyone's posts - and I have to digress. I believe my sweetie is the best on earth!

    We didn't meet until 95 - but have been together ever since. I realized I had a gem when I fainted on the toilet and had to call for help. There he was. And, this is the embarassing part, he reached for the toilet paper. I gave him a funny look and said I had allready cleaned my self.. Just needed help getting up.

    He's my other half.

    It is so good to know that there are others blessed. There just should be more vying for the best husband around award!

  10. allie124

    allie124 New Member

    I met my husband before I got my diagnosis. I don't think he always knew how to deal with it. We've had our share of problems. But fortunately we can get by on just his salary, so when we moved to another state I did not get a job. It has been almost 2 years here, and it is enough of a job doing dishes, fixing breakfast and dinner, doing laundry, ironing, general cleaning, and I don't always get these basic things done. He has been very understanding of that. He also has gotten a taste of my sleep habits-he has been sick with a terrible sinus infection this week and has not been able to get the sleep he needs. He said to me today that he doesn't know how I do it, going days with only an hour or two of sleep. I know it is hard on spouses, and I thank God every day for my husband! He even reads to me because my eyes and head usually hurt too much to focus on reading. It is wonderful, and it is actually how I think he came to better understand FMS. I had a terrific book about FMS, that I have since loaned and lost, that I had read a few years ago. When I wanted to re-read some of the information, he started reading it to me. What a difference it has made. I encourage all of us with FMS / CFS to have their significant others, even their mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, older children to read about our illness. It can make such a difference in how they view the illness and treat us. Awareness is so important. And our families will benefit by the knowledge that it can affect people differently and the same treatment will not always work for everyone. Here's to all the terrific family members who love and support us!
  11. dolsgirl

    dolsgirl New Member

    I've got a gem myself. He's so understanding and has always stood by me through thick and thin. We've had some very rough times and he's always there. Even right now it's tough. We relocated for my health which is great (no more New England winters!) but I've gotten a job and he hasn't been able to find one yet. I suggested that he apply for unemployment, although he left his job of 22 years for us to relocate for me. Because that was the reason we were leaving, he did qualify for unemployment, so presently he's getting it. Still looking for a job. He knows that I'm having a hard time with my new job change and he comes everyday and spends lunch with me. We eat together & then I sleep in the car for a half hour. It's just great to have him there. He's even suggested that I quit, but we really need the money and benies. dolsgirl