i just have some things on my mind tonight or today i should say

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by 69mach1, Feb 1, 2006.

  1. 69mach1

    69mach1 New Member

    i am starting my new med vivactil, they told me to take it at night, but the backgorund of the med is more energziing...it's an antidepressant...

    i had to stop the sinemet for restless legs...wired me and horrible taste in my mouth...

    worried about losing weight...meaning i need to

    i need to quit smoking as i took it up not long after i said i was going to quit...

    i have to do sleep study 2/19...apena?

    i have been falling asleep when ever i sit down or lie down on my couch...worries me...i am getting older, but that is one reason i am having a sleep study...worry it is not more...

    then i have to do a sidmoidoscopy on 2/17 check to see if something else is going on, for i have as she said(doctor) i have no muscles in the right side of my rectum..i guess it could be my back...

    so then we will do an mri on my thoracic area....who knows maybe it is adhesions in my abdomen that is causing the above problem...or worse cancer or polps...i had a lower gi done when i was 18 and maybe a 105 lbs tops..i am 5'2"... i dont weight that any more..

    then i had my x-husband call me again today just to see how i am and what i have been doing...

    i just don't get him...last week sunday he said he needed me to get my health better and needed me to get fit, lose weight..not only that for my health...

    yes we were being intimate togehter for about 2 years not quite...but i kept saying where is this going etc...told him he needed to seek therapy...so now he is i guess and last sunday he said he is trying to keep this on a friednship relationsip for now...

    well just venting and trying to not let my mind wonder the what ifs and and try not to get bitter...

    oh yeah i told him about how the and docotr that saw our son last firday asked about what are we going to do about my carpal tunnel surgery...? x-hb says well you need to get it done so i can work and not be poor...i bit my tongue and told him i will always probably be poor...you see he decided to go to pipefitters school and leave my son and i and work in a union and do the schooling at tnight///and move in w/some stupid stripper/and or dancer...what ever...he moved in w/her and of course she took him for some money...and made my life cahoitic...filing restaing orders and calling cps on me and making y sone get pulled out of the classroom in 7th grade saying i don't feed him, but yet says i only take him to mcdonalds...i had to tell the socail worker i would love to be able totake my son to mcdonalds' but i can not pay for that on food stamps...

    well anyways..i need to end this now just venting...i need to take a sleeping pill and wake up in 7 hours ..

    jodie


    ps everything got dropped in regards to the restrining order and cps stuf was found unfounded...they wee ticked tha this even got done[This Message was Edited on 02/04/2006]
  2. DLsGroovyMoM

    DLsGroovyMoM New Member

    Venting is good.

    Sorry to hear your ex is being so wishy washy...wish I had the money to send you so you could take your son to mcyd's, that makes me so sad!

    Chin up and call on me any time...Lord knows I've called on all of you enough...

    ((((hugs)))
    Amy
  3. Trena

    Trena New Member

    I think one of the best things you can do is to get it all out. Pour your heart out to anyone who can listen and just get it off your chest and don't keep it all pent up inside. I know stress worsens my condition and I can see that you have plenty to stress you right now. I would also add that you should not allow your husband who left you and allowed a stripper to move in with him the opportunity to be intimate with you. You need to think more of yourself than that and not let him "use" you. You are worth more than that and can do better. You do what is best for you and your son and let your husband fend for himself until he can give you the respect you deserve. Will pray for your situataion. Cheer up ...........tomorrow will be a better day. God bless you. Do something good for you. Take a showere and paint your toenails.........LOL....just know you are a person of worth and too good for someone to take advantage of and put you on a guilt trip!
  4. 69mach1

    69mach1 New Member

    i just needed to vent, i guess it is like a journal for me at times...and it is nice to hear from supportive people....

    oh yeah the cps was pissed at him, evrything was dropped and she sent us or cody for therapy and she said that i could use that for my benefit against him...the county paid it...and asked why is allowed visitation...i said aske the judge...comes out it ws the girlfriend that filed the complaints for both restraining order and cps...they all got dropped....but it was his fault because he allowed...she did that b ecaue she was afraid we would get back together...comes out he never wanted the divorce...but anyways...

    well i am eating lunch if i feel up to it saturday w/the ex-husband...i am getting worked up for it...anxiety and crying already...

    i don't feel well and running a fever cold stuff...

    but i need to get this off my chest and lay it out on the table to him...on how feel and if he doesn't want to stick to the child visitation orders then he sould go to the judge and change it....

    i alrady know he is not going to want to do that caue then he will owe me more in child support...but i am working on that with da office then i will contact an attorney...he will be a journeyman steamp
    fitter come june...so he is making 40$ now and he is only getting 35% pay at the apprentice level...

    and when we went to court in 2002 he was making lessthan this like 22 an hour...

    i was stupid and only requested spousal support until our son graduated from high schoo...i can not go extend it to the judge only the x could allow it and the chances of that happening is nil...

    we have known eachother for 23 years...he called me last october 25th and wished me happy anniversary..he did that the year beofre...anywasy he is so confusing to me..


    jodie

    thank for your imput everyone
  5. Cromwell

    Cromwell New Member

    Wow, what a lot you are dealing with right now. I wish you nothing but goodness and light and hope this all turns around for you.

    Good luck
    Love Anne