I made the call today to SSA for Disability- I'm 30!

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by LollieBoo, Oct 13, 2005.

  1. LollieBoo

    LollieBoo New Member

    JUST 30 (Sept. 6) I'm sorta' bummed, not geared up for a fight and I don't want to be denied, but I don't want the label "disabled" to become official. It wrecked me.

    My interview is on Halloween. They will call me for it since I am not able to drive that far.

    Any advice? Questions? Input?

    It is ALL so welcome!!!

    Thanks All!
    Lollie
  2. fivesue

    fivesue New Member

    that someone who is only thirty is having to file for disability! I know you are a real goer, so I do wish you well in this process, but again, I'm so sorry you're having to do it.

    I have never been through this process, but since it's on Halloween, why don't you dress up like a leper or something...something that LOOKS SICK! (-: At least, don't wear make-up! (-: Only kidding. I'm sure others will give you good tips. My best as you pursue this course.

    Hugs,
    Sue
  3. DLsGroovyMoM

    DLsGroovyMoM New Member

    as I am right were you are...almost...haven't made the call yet but hubby is begging me to. I'm 31. I am a nurse working full time and instead of getting better I am getting worse latey. I still want to go..go..go and do things makes me sick to my stomach how little I do these days. I wish you good luck. Keep us informed would like to know how things go...

    love and hugs
    Amy
  4. rosemarie

    rosemarie Member

    I am nervous about it. It just seems to take so very long to be approved for it. My sister is on it and it took her 2 years from the first time she tried on her own. So I am thinking that I may find a lawyer to talk to about it and see what he or she can tell me abouat how I should go about doing it and what I need to help speed the process up a bit.

    I have heard that having a lawyer really helps you get it through all though the lawyer will atuomaticly take 20% of your settlement. My sister got a big settlement for being off workand disabled for 2 years and he was the one who helped her get it and she took got a large amount of money for those two years that the judge decised she was disabled and i think it was about $10,000 and he got 20% of that money.


    But I really don't know much about usuing a lawyer so that is why I am going to call one and find out why it is better to have him help me and what is his fee the percentage , I hope that I will be able to find out all thtat I need to do. But I am going to file but I have not got around to it yetr and I am 49 years old and I have not been able to work for the past 2.5 years.

    I Hope that all goes right for you . Rosemarie
  5. rileyearl

    rileyearl New Member

    How discouraging for you. All you want to do is be well!

    It is so smart to apply for it now, though, because even if it doesn't get approved for years, you'll get paid back to the day you signed up. (I just know that would pay for a writer's conference.)

    I think you should wear a costume--something with feathers would be best--and sit in front of a mirror while you're talking on the phone. That will remind you that you are so much more than the set of symptoms and limitations you're relating to the bureaucrat on the other end of the line.

    Then, hang up, hug a baby and get back to what's important--taking care of you and loving your family.

    Love,

    Francie

  6. justlikemom

    justlikemom New Member

    I'm only 28 and should be getting an answer about my case in the next couple of weeks.

    It's frustrating and humiliating. I already use the term disabled to describe myself, it helps explain to people why I am no longer employed.

    What I have trouble getting used to is the "oh you poor dear"s I get from people. I've accepted my disability. I don't need their pity. I make the most of my situation.

    I know it's difficult to accept one's own limitations, and it's very difficult to think of yourself as "disabled", especially when you were once very able. But, after a period of mourning, it doesn't seem so bad.
  7. Rosiebud

    Rosiebud New Member

    and the rest of you who are so young, I'm so sorry.

    I started symptoms at 30 but was able to study and work until I was 45.

    A 'period of mourning' is necessary and will probably come anyway. I went through a bereavement process when I had to give up my job, recognise it and understand it will pass.

    Good luck with the disability, if you are refused then appeal.

    love
    Rosie
  8. LollieBoo

    LollieBoo New Member

    Hoping that the SSA isn't! No, really- There is so much I don't want to let go of. I volunteer for our local rescue squad and have for 5 years. We are in the process of recertifying our EMT licenses. I am taking the classes, even though I can't respond to calls and stuff, but I don't want to let my license lapse, because then "when I get better", and want to be able to get back to active response- I don't want to have to go through all the classes again and have to sit for the National Exam.

    "When I get better", DH and I want to have at least one more baby- we wanted 2 or 3 more.

    I'm still sick that I can never donate blood again, or make use of my organs through donation when I die. All of these little personal losses need their own mourning process, and there are so many I'm just not ready to face yet. One by one, I have to let them all go and move on, but sometimes I'm overwhelmed by the personal assaults this dd has mounted.

    I have suffered from FM for many, many years and I want to be done already! I want more control over my life and how I feel. I meditate and pray and take every ounce of responsibility for the things I can control... but I will always have a huge list of things that are beyond my ability to control. It's hard to mount the determination needed to get through each day when you are being told that you are disabled. And I know I have to admit my disabilities and focus on them if I want to be approved.

    It's just hard to reconcile withtin myself... and I know I'm being terribly selfish! Justlikemom... 28! Others, my age who have not experienced yet the joy of pregnancy and childbirth having to deal with this...I can't imagine! Yet, I indulge my own fears and losses to the point that they consume me at times. It's hard not to. My DH didn't sign on for this... Oh, I have to stop wallowing!!!

    Justlikemom- I know exactly what you mean about people saying, "Oh you poor thing!" or some days even "How are you?" is too much of a reminder of my differences- it makes me feel like my shortcomings are glaringly obvious. I haven't dealt with them in full, but like I said before- I can only deal with so much at a time and I don't want to be reminded about the rest...

    Hey- Thanks for dropping in on my Pity-Party! What a blast, huh?

    Oh, I'm over it for now... until the next wave...

    Thanks for all your support! You are all so brave and strong- many of you knowing way worse things that what I've had dished out to me, so your support means the world to me.

    Hugs all around!
    Lollie

    P.s. the advice really does help- I'm sort of lost in this whole process and my brain fog is terribly dense these days- I'd swear it is solid at times! ;)
  9. alaska3355

    alaska3355 New Member

    I know you are saddened by the disability thing, but I guess you could look at it as more time with your family. I know you enjoy your kids and they'll enjoy having you around more!
    Love, Terri
  10. hdbubblehead

    hdbubblehead New Member

    ...but, because "they" won't be seeing you, a little extra truth won't hurt.
    Remember these next few words okay? ready...?

    God knows exactly where you are in your disability. He will give you the words you will need, so do not become
    anxious about anything.All you need is Faith.
    and you have your support people right here!
    just write, someone always answers. :)
    ____________________
    I was denied 2 x's even appealed with the ALJ. but he was mean and said, "unfavorable" decision.
    I had Faith, I had hope in receiving what I felt I deserved for financial aid, but I did not "win" my claim.
    That's okay, because what I found out just last night,
    that, if you have an inheritance or more than $2,000.
    in assets coming your way someday, they will cancel your
    disability for up to 36 months.
    And because I was applying for SSI and not SSDI
    (SSI= i do not have enough "work hour" credits)
    I would have to explain all my personal income over a certain amount.
    for me, it would be like being on welfare, and thats not where I will be in the future, so it's best i did not "win"
    My disability is more short term, because I have a spinal cord degeneration disease, overlapping with lupus, fibromyalgia, CFS, chronic pain, and so many more problems health wise, including a family with heart disease on both sides.
    I won't live in a wheelchair, or a hospital, or be a burden to my family. I will fade away. I think right now, I am here to help encourage others with their lives.
    My will to live, comes from God. I am hopeful you believe in Jesus and know everything will be alright with you.
    (even if it's not the way You planned it)

    I don't believe in celebrating halloween anymore. I used to do all that "fun" stuff, but I don't celebrate the dead that way anymore. And I give out coloring books, and the kids love it, you should hear them screaming as they run to their parents.
    anyway, lollie, you will do fine. don't sweat it.
    as far as the "disability" word, you don't have to use it.
    find a word that you like better, to discribe your condition. ** i say I have " life long limitations".

    xx hd, your gonna be okay, your a winner!
  11. browneyes259

    browneyes259 New Member

    So sorry to hear that you are having to apply for disability.

    I am only 27, about to turn 28, and I am so sorry that you are having to resort to disability.

    I know from being your age how sad that would be to me too. You have so much life ahead of you. It's hard to label yourself at so young.

    I am very blessed and I am still able to work. So many on this board are not. Try not to feel guilty/bad/depressed about the 'label' of disability. There is still hope that they will find a way out of this DD for us.

    I wish you all the best with your hearing and sending gentle hugs your way....
    Jen
  12. nursejoy

    nursejoy New Member

    Hi,
    I am a 48 year female,I have had fibromyaglia for 18 years. And I live my life to the fullest. I went back to college in my 30s to become a nurse. Raised 3 sons..Now I work 3 to 4 twelve hours shifts a Week on a busy med/surg unit...I wake up with stiff muscles and pain everyday,Feeling tired because i dont get a restful sleep its would be so easy to not get up and give in to it, but I know that is the worst thing I can do to myself. /execise is the best thing for suffers of fibromyaglia..yes its hurts when your start them the first time but it does get better. i turned down my doctors offer for a narcotic pain meds..I have seen too many suffers and know how addicted people can become to them, and the complications those durgs have on your body, I know there is no cure for this but i also know it wont kill me. At the hospital,I see so many ill people suffering that it makes me realize my problem with this chonic illness is nothing to compare. I have not let fibromyalia rule my life..None of us should. Get up walk ,, dance.. swim .. you will be surprized how much beter your will feel.....You dont have to be disabled with this....
    [This Message was Edited on 10/15/2005]
    [This Message was Edited on 10/15/2005]
  13. bukswife

    bukswife New Member

    i got my first denial...from ssdi and i have a lawyer...they said that i can stand on my feet for 8 hours even though i have severe pain...as long as i dont bend squat crawl or climb stairs...and i can life up to 20 pounds..they said even though i have memory problems there is something i can do...i saw two of ssdi docs...i felt so humilated when i left their office feeling very badley about myself...so i am appealing...have a letter from one doc who says i am severly disabled...its what i wanted him to say but at the same time was very upsetting to me...i am 51 years old and if i had a nickel for everytime someone says to me hey you look great!!! i would be a rich person and could share with everyone...so i guess all i can say is ..dont give up...hang in there...eventually you will get the ssdi if you have the right documentation...a lawyer isnt a bad way to go..and they only get monies if they win for you...i am collecting long term from my job right now but have to be recertified every few months...very nerve wrackeing...hang in there...