Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by ConfusedInPA, Jun 13, 2013.
I don't see the same thing you do unless I'm not signed in. Isn't there something you can click to report the post? If anyone is rude, they are warned, if we know about it. You are right; this is not a place to judge. There are so many conditions and subsets of conditions that many fit into our area and, even if they do not, no one should judge them.
Oh Diane, I was kidding with Julie, she is more a superwoman to me than one who suffers with CFS, I've said this before to her and when I read what she had completed for her day, I just had to comment....no intention to hurt, but I just said it. Please!!!!!
I think anyone who suffers with CFS and makes it through the day is a superwoman. I originally defended your comment as I didn't think that you meant anything malicious by it, but now I'm not so sure.
OK, let's just agree that most of us would never say anything to hurt another. If we find we have, we should apologize. If we are kidding someone, adding a smily face let's them know we aren't serious. If we do find a post which we KNOW is rude, reporting it helps us keep the boards "pain free."
When I first read the comment I was very surprised and I figured that she was probably joking but it could have been taken the wrong way, especially if you are tenderhearted, extremely fatigued and in pain !!!. . I don't think Jam meant to be cruel but the way it was stated could have hurt someone's feelings. Maybe there just should have been a smiley face. However, sometimes our brains are not always working the way they should. I know I am a grouch today - sorry and my b/p up and in the midst of trying to change thyroid meds.
Maybe we all need to remember to put out those smileys or LOL's when you mean it as a joke as the reader may not take it the way it was intended. Don't know what Julie really feels or felt about it . I hope she wasn't to upset but for sure maybe she was so busy doing stuff for people she didn't think about it to much. Yes, she is such a busy person who pushes herself for her family, even when feeling bad. I know the feeling as I think I do some of that myself even though not so much for the kids as they aren't that close as hers are. We all need to be mindful of what we post and I know I am not perfect, for sure .
Love to you all,
I might be out of line, or step on a few toes here, but what the heck....
Personally I think people overreacted and got upset over nothing. The written word shows NO EMOTION, it has NO facial expressions, NO body language, NO anything. It's just words written down.
I think before someone jumps on someone else for what they have written, people should ASK FOR CLARIFICATION...... Ask the person what they meant when posting.
I think it was rude to post in several different areas on the forum how one person upset another and that this person was also named and pointed out. I just think asking for clarification, or speaking in private would have been a better way to handle things.
Just my 2 cents....
Well, a couple more comments from me, if I could I'd take back my comments I would and again it wasn't meant to hurt anyone, just what I was feeling I guess. I think Julie is a very kind and giving person, doing more than I could ever imagine doing. So that always made me kinda wonder, I never thought for a moment she didn't have the CFS challenge...and as someone else said, there are many degrees....some have a hard time walking for a while. Some days I feel so fatigued, and think, do I have cfs, but it's fatigue from pain I believe.
But I have to say if this comment was made to another person I know that I would never have gone off and posted about "it" the way it was done...never. And Diane, I've always felt a fondness for you, you know that.
Julie, you post away all you want, you won't hear anything from me on those threads.....take care. jam
PS: Yesterday at bridge, we have a woman who plays with us and she is forever calling people on what they do when they play their game, no one else is in our minds, we do what we see and feel at the time....we are forever bringing this to her attention and it continues always...people complain about her all the time, and yesterday, she went on and on critiquing everyone's play, and I guess I just had it and threw my cards down and really blew up....it was a very tense afternoon after that, but she was a changed person and at the end of the day, she apologized for her actions.....so sometimes we have to let our feelings out and not always in a gentle way. I like this woman in many ways, but this side of her is not likeable.
Well, maybe I said too much here, maybe not....we have to say what we feel, I do anyway. Life is getting shorter.
Julie - Please don't change the way you post. That is one of the things most of us love about you. It cheers me up I know even if I know you are going to wear yourself out but it is for your family and that is what count. I envy the closeness you have to them in availablilty to each other and in each others hearts.
I wish I was younger and lived closer to my kids but I don't and I am to challenged at this point to do what you or others do. I have friends that are older than I and they are driving all over the place to see grandkids play different sports, etc. We don't do that much traveling to see the kids play. The closest kid is maybe an hour and 15 minutes away into the city or towards it and the traffic is awful. I usually have more patience than DH does but hate traffic and can't drive out of my comfort zone. The pain has really worn me down and I can feel the b/p rising as I drive. DH has hi b/p but not as bad as I and he is getting so he hates to drive there too. We all do what we can, I guess.
Yes, Jam and everyone, life is to short so we all have to do what we can and sometimes it might not be pretty due to our situations. However, we all need to try and continue to be respectful and loving towards each other. Yes, we are and should be "family " as in a way, as many of us have no way to vent, or get out to talk to people much, except for these boards. Or they are challenged in different ways,
Jam's apology was accepted by Julie. So, let's try and move on from here.
Love to you ALL,
Exactly. Just what you said. Let's all move on.
Julie, you have to know the situation re: the woman who upsets so many, we've talked to her many times and it just hasn't sunk in or she doesn't want it to, the latter I'm sure...she's a smart woman. ...she and another lady have upset so many of we "calm" players, she and this other lady are very emotional players and very cut throat....so what I did, was in order.
The "other" woman who is also very emotional player, hyper etc. has also been "told" by many and again, about 2 months ago 4 of us were playing some extra hands after everyone else left and she went on and on with her rants, and here again, I had just had it and this situation I threw my cards down and said I'm leaving, this is not necessary...well here again this woman has made a somewhat change too. These 2 ladies are notorious BUT good bridge players, and I like to play with advanced players so I can learn more too. we have other players who are good and calm and nothing like these 2.
My blowing up with these 2 were probably long overdue and the time came and there it was....but they have done some changing...we'll see how long it lasts.
Bridge can be very emotional for a lot of people who want to "win" and these players (2) are known to pick on those who are not as good as them....
If one doesn't play bridge, then it's hard to understand. I so enjoy the game and the challenge but am not a cut throat player for a moment, I like to win, but if I don't it's not the end of the world so to speak....it's nice when everyone wins....jam
Funny, how my social life, at this point, centers around bridge...my social life is about dead for the most part and my bridge games are a highpoint. MY teenage grandkids are busy with their lives and don't come around to hold their grandma's hand...I know they love me but they are doing their lives and very concerned with their father who is doing poorly with the cancer in his body. My daughter is solely taking care of them as the dad just can't do anything for them, but thankfully the financial is there for them from him.
I could beat myself up that I'm not more available to them, but I'm not, I'm not available for many at this point...
And again, there are so many personalities in our lives, and so many cyber in these times...things change, people die, people move, etc. time for my bed....
Hi Julie Just wanted to say how much I love your posts! I love reading about all the details of your farm life and your family! I go to the Porch and the Lounge to relax or in the morning for a lovely wake-up time.
I find that the 'details' of each person's posts -descriptions of places, lifestyles, people, animals, plants, the seasons, are a generous gift to all the rest of us at PH. I love reading books of Letters , and these posts are like on-going letters. They are delightful, and an important part of my life in my living with these DD's. They make me feel connected. I love them.
PLEASE don't change or edit them down It would be such a huge loss.
JAM - I get so encouraged by your health writings. Just today my husband found our juicer which has been packed away from Hurricane Irene and ensuing mold problems. I am eager to start juicing, and that's from both you and Julie's reporting on these benefits. Everyone adds something.
With love to all,
I agree with whomever said, "Let's move on." I think everyone has fully explained, apologized, forgiven, and offered words of kindness. Our Online Family is like any family; we sometimes have some misunderstandings but we always know we love and respect one another. Let's go forward and build on that love and respect.
Love, as always,
I just read and felt so happy for some reason....everyone reaching out to each other...
Wanted to say 'I love you all, each n everyone, I'm proud I belong to this particular
online community, you guys are the best, Muahhhhhh
Amen, THE END !!!!
We don't ban people lightly, except for the snake oil salespeople who come here to peddle their wares, which is against the rules. If someone gets warned, it's for a good reason, not because someone is trying to clarify or apologize. As I said several posts ago, I think everyone is good and it is reaaaaaally time to move on. Things were aired, apologies accepted and we all still love each other. What could be better than that?
Please, no more needs to be said.
Hugz to you Mikie and all the Modrators and all that run this great group.
P.S. You said it very well !!
Thanks, Granni. I know the admin and mods work very hard. I've been a slacker due to surgery and lack of tech skills but I'll get back into the game. In any case, you are very sweet to recognize us in your shout-out. Appreciate it.
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