I was insulted, I have to say something!

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by joc_07, Nov 7, 2005.

  1. joc_07

    joc_07 New Member

    I had replied to a post the other day and had given my opinion. That's what we do here on this message board. I was very polite and there was nothing wrong with what I wrote.

    About 7 replys after me, someone had posted and said that only their post and about 4 or 5 posts before should be read and to ignore the other posts. I was so very insulted to see that someone believed that they were so above me that my opinion wasn't good enough.

    So I went and deleted my post because I was embarassed and hurt about that one persons comment.

    Please respect other peoples opinions, even if they are different from your own.
  2. shelbo

    shelbo New Member

    Just trying to defend myself...but I'm trying to remember that 99.9% of the people here are wonderful, amazing people who share so much despite all their own problems and limitations! I know it can get you down and we should all be able to express our opinions without being insulted but we need to concentrate on the many, many wonderful, helpful people on here!

    God bless, Love Shelbo
  3. abbylee

    abbylee New Member

    That is a bummer when we get overlooked - especially when we put so much time and thought into replies, but I guess we don't always apply in the way someone thinks applies to their problem.

    I just chalk that up to brain fogged, stressed out, sick people and try to go on my way.

    Written words are sometimes hard to know the meaning behind - it's a shame we can't talk on the phone!!
  4. ntlov

    ntlov New Member

    you need to ignore these "controlling" people- they dont have any control in their life so they come here and try to be an expert!

    none of use have any right to put down others remarks... nobody knows the real answers on why we are sick, so this person who slammed you needs an adjustment!




    [This Message was Edited on 11/07/2005]
  5. Alyndra

    Alyndra New Member

    Seriously. For some reason peoples' ugly side are starting to show more and more these days; and I certainly don't just mean on the message boards!

    I'm usually one of the first on the list to have different opinions from most other people - but different opinion or not, respect comes first!

    I'm sorry that because of someone else's mindset that you felt you had to withdraw. When you're offering your opinion, you can never be wrong.

    I hope this is the last situation you'll have to see of the sort.

    ~Amanda
  6. Musica

    Musica New Member

    I hope that I have not said anything to offend anyone, although I know sometimes our written words can be misconstrued. Thankfully, I know I have never said to only pay attention to certain posts, and I think that is extremely rude. I hate to see good boards go bad, which is what is happening on another board I have been on. The "drama" over there has gotten to be too much, and I hardly post there anymore.

    There will certainly be people who disagree, and whose disagreements seem a little harsh, but to basically say your opinion doesn't count is really out of line. I hope it was because that person was in a lot of pain, although I know someone who pretended to be someone she was not and we all gave her the benefit of the doubt, assuming she was not feeling well. That's the thing, with people feeling like we do, we bend over backwards, but some people just don't know how to respect others.

    I hope you will not be discouraged from posting here; your opinions DO count.
  7. dononagin

    dononagin New Member

    don't let the few bad apples get ya down.. I just peeked at your profile.. you are a beautiful young woman!!

    I think generally most of the folks on this board mean well.. stick around and don't let them spoil the board for you..
    Hugs!
  8. LISALOO

    LISALOO New Member

    I understand how you feel, but remember your opinion is valuable to lots of us!
  9. pamj

    pamj New Member

    Don't take it personally, some people put down others to make themselves feel better. Hopefully this person reads this thread & regrets their behavior in such a friendly, supportive environment.

    By the way, I checked your profile and you are absolutely beautiful!! That's a great picture, you look like a very sweet, happy person!

    take care, Pam
  10. stinker56

    stinker56 New Member

    I haven't been here for too long but I have to say, everyone has been really nice and helpful with anything I have asked. Maybe someone was just having a very painful day which doesn't excuse being rude or insulting but it might explain it a little bit. I would hate to not be able to read this site everyday. It has been such a lifeline for me and I hope it is for you too. I hope you have better experiences from here on out and have a really good week. You are a beautiful young lady.
    Stinker56
    P.S. Congratulations on your engagement![This Message was Edited on 11/07/2005]
  11. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    Click on the little triangle in the lower left-hand corner and a window will open up. Click on automatic moderator or send an e-mail to alert someone about any rudeness.

    This board has grown so much that it is impossible to delete all the rude posts. The Tech Support and Moderators depend on the members to let them know when something isn't right.

    Unfortunately, when something like this happens, it can grow into a war, with people taking sides, in a very short period of time. Feelings get hurt and our members' stress levels go sky high. This isn't good for any of us.

    I'm sorry this happened to you.

    Love, Mikie
  12. jennypee

    jennypee New Member

    And everyone's right, you are absolutely beautiful.

    I would probably cry my heart out if someone was rude to me on this board.
  13. razorqueen

    razorqueen Member

    I would never say my opinion was better than someone elses! Its just an opinion, not a fact, and it's just different! If we were all the same then most of us wouldn't be necessary! We are all necessary on this board. I myself made a bit of a rude comment on one of my posts the other day, which I have since apologized for, as that is not usually how I conduct myself. Not to excuse myself, but I was in desparate need of support, and didn't feel I was getting it fast enough. That was selfish. I know others have there own issues to deal with, and mine aren't more important than others.
    Blessings,
    Raz
  14. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    There is no inflection w/ the printed word to help convey the meaning.

    I was "insulted" on the front page of my lodge's newsletter. But I suspect the writer is just awkward w/ words, or part of the sentence was accidently deleted, etc.

    I figure we are all in the same leaky boat. If something can be interpreted more than one way, I'll take the non-insulting meaning pending further evidence.

  15. Rosiebud

    Rosiebud New Member

    just press the alert button if you see someone is being rude to your or to anyone else.

    It can stop everyone becoming involved, the offending post will be deleted. I have done this twice where the rudeness and offensiveness has been exceptional, it's not something I've done lightly but I dont like to see posts that are intentionally hurtful.

    love
    Rosie
    [This Message was Edited on 11/08/2005]
    [This Message was Edited on 11/09/2005]
  16. Bambi

    Bambi New Member

    see why mostly grown women can't just post to the person we feel we've been offended by, put it out there and up front "I hope you didn't mean to but you offended me when you said...." and adding maybe "no other opinions of support needed. I appreciate everyone has opinions but I'd really like to solve this between the two of us please". Or ask the person to meet you in chat?

    I don't think I'd ever hit the button on anyone. I've seen some be kicked off the board for waht seemed sort of like a bad day remark or something, and I hate to see anyone loose the board unless it's truly BAD.
  17. joc_07

    joc_07 New Member

    Thanks for the positive comments as I had not expected any replys. I was just hoping to encourage postive comments on this board.

    If someone is having a bad day hopefully they will think twice before posting a comment that would be hurtful to someone else. We have to realize that the other people that are on this board are just like us...always in pain. And that we don't need another person in this world tearing us down.

    As for the comment that I should "confront" this person, I should not have to "confront" a person on this board. This should not have happened in the first place.

    Thanks again for all you wonderful comments, my head was starting to swell.lol.

    Jocelyn
  18. ilovecats94

    ilovecats94 New Member

    I've had my feelings hurt on here many times and sometimes have deleted a post because of it.

    I rarely post a thread anymore because no one will answer it. Then once it gets to the third page, I just have deleted it.

    I have seen some insulting posts on here, but I usually just read the thread and try not to get involved in it.

    This same thing has also led me to read more and not answer many posts like I used to at one time.

    It's sad, but I don't need the stress in my life of being hurt when all I was trying to do was to help.

    Hugs,
    Faye
  19. sofy

    sofy New Member

    Sure its possible someone ment to insult you but that a reflection on them not you.

    Remember that the written word has no inflection and can be easily misinterperted.

    Ive always been a straight talker and quite blunt but usually soften it with humor. On the written page both of these traits can be interperted as rude & crude.

    Put on your armour and best thought for those of us here that might be misinterperted or just plain "out of it" on the day they wrote. Even if they are just plain mean beings then they need our good thoughts even more.

    Rage and anger can be part of the symptoms of sick people so try and just overlook anything that sounds a little harsh.

    Im sorry you got your feelings hurt but you sound strong enough to not have suffered any permanent damage to your self esteem and soft heart.
  20. hdbubblehead

    hdbubblehead New Member

    if I ever hurt anyone's feelings, please let me know.
    Sometimes I write too long. Blame it on the DD. or medications. xxhd.