I went to my SSD hearing today

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by OuchyMama, Apr 2, 2003.

  1. OuchyMama

    OuchyMama New Member

    I was so nervous I started crying before the judge even got there. No way to tell how it went he had a real poker face. He was very rude and cold. My symptoms and pain seemed to annoy him. He referred to fibro as a "supposed" illness. I can only pray now there is some shred of compassion in him. I am so tired of fighting this it has been going on since Feb 2000. I am so depressed now if I get a no I am worried about being even more down I cannot handle much more. My illness has devistated us financially and it is so hard on my husband he works so hard but my surgery bills meds and loss of my income has pushed us near bankruptcy. we fight over money we are both so tired and stressed. He is so stressed he is severely depressed also. This is going to cost me my home, my credit but the worst is I am begining to lose my marriage. I feel like I have done this to him I feel guilty about being sick. Thanks So much for your support
  2. lin21

    lin21 New Member


    I am going through the same thing (almost) but with my LTD insurance. I just entered my second appeal and I am so nervous about it. When they denied me the first time I went into such a flare for weeks because I was so sure they couldn't deny it.
    I was just diagnosed in November and we were going through the same thing with the stress and arguments over money. It's terrible that we have to go through this when we are so sick and stress makes it worse. We are living day to day and I am just praying it goes through soon.
    I will say a prayer for you.
    Good luck,
  3. catgal

    catgal New Member

    Hi OuchyMoma~~Don't let the fight for your right to SSD wear you down to the point you quit standing up for what you're entitled to. The road may be long and weary, but be persistent as hell. If you don't get it this time out, let them know you're not going to just swivel up and fade away. You'll eventually get it.

    Your worry over feeling guilty for being sick is wasted energy--energy you need to conserve and regroup. You didn't volunteer to be stuck down with a debilitating illness no more than anyone asks to be a diabetic. Guilt like that is a waste of vital resources, a destroyer of self-esteem, and destructive to your health. If it were your husband or child who was chronically ill--would you want them to feel guilty and bad about themselves?

    And I could feel your heartache and dismay over the fear of losing your marriage. The environment of guilt and depression has to change. It's toxic. It's a downer. It's a bummer. Do something positive such as renew your marriage vows. Renew your commitment to one another. See a marriage counselor, talk to your pastor, Renew your devotion for one another. Don't sit and let it die~~~renew it, revitalize it, recapture the commitment you made to one another....refresh your memories of why you got married in the first place. Take a walk, have a talk, fall in love all over again. Do Something!

    Instead of continually apologizing for something beyond your control......tell him how much you appreciate him, show him your gratitude, let him know you'd do the same for him if the situations were reversed.

    WRITE HIM A "LOVE LETTER".............{yes, a Love Letter!)

    Good Luck on your SSD, and Blessings to You, Carol....
  4. nancyw

    nancyw New Member

    Hi Ouchymama: I just started this odessy and filed my first claim last week. However, I found some information and I think I posted something on it before, but can't remember for sure. It mentioned contacting your Congressperson to request a congressional inquiry on your behalf. I talked to my rep here and got the instructions to do just that. The rep said they cannot "change" the ruling, but it should put your claim on the top of the stack. I just did a web search for congressperson in my state and was totally surprised to actually find listed there the fact that they can help you with any federal agency. I would suggest you call your congressperson and tell them the situation and hopefully they can assist you. Good luck and keep your chin up!
  5. Hidn

    Hidn New Member

    Please dont feel bad about crying, I think many of us do that! I went last week for my hearing and I cried too, which triggered my asthma, which led to them having to stop and get me some water and kleenex...I too dont know what will happen if I am turned down. You are not alone in all of this! Dont give up :) (((((((((((((((Ouchymama)))))))))))
    We will all make thru somehow. I do wish I could help you
  6. JannyW

    JannyW New Member

    I will probably burst into tears as well ... I haven't gotten my hearing date yet, probably won't be until July or August. I understand about the financial issues. I have had to start monthly withdrawals from my IRA, which I'll have to pay taxes on if my claim is denied again. Once I'm declared disabled, tho, it's tax free.

    I broke my ankle 3 weeks ago & have been hobbling around on crutches ... add that to the fibro pain, etc. and there's a lot of crying going on around here! We did manage to borrow a wheelchair from our church, tho, which helps on the "long" trips ... like to the doctor's office.

    Hang in there, kiddo ...

    Jan ^v^
  7. OuchyMama

    OuchyMama New Member

    Thank You all for you kind words. It will ease the wait for my answer over the next few weeks.