Im desperate

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Fibrolady37, Jul 29, 2006.

  1. Fibrolady37

    Fibrolady37 New Member

    Hi all i hope youre as well as can be expected.
    I have ME,CFIDS,FMS,SYGRENS SYNDROME,IBS,ASTHMA,ALLERGIES & i was dx with OSTEOARTHRITIS 7 weeks ago i have 41 illnesses altogether now.
    Im very depressed & i have been since my 12 year old daughter was born 12 years ago.
    Ive been on prozac,ciparimil,effexor & ive had all the side effects theyre awful.
    None of them worked & i now take dothiepin which doesnt work as im more depressed now than ive ever been.
    Im depressed because its so hard trying to cope with 41 varying illnesses with numerous symptoms.
    Because of all these illnesses im more depressed than ive ever been im so sad & desperate.
    I feel so ill & im so sad i cry for nothing & its really getting me down.
    I go to see my psychiatrist on thursday & i will talk to him & see if there are any other anti depressants & antipsychotics i can take.
    Im so lucky to have a fibrofamily of such special & lovely kind & understanding friends.
    I love you all so much & im so glad we can help each other.
    Even when we are really ill were all stil her each other.
    Im always here for everyone & i love listening to all of you i dont mind if you rant,want advice support anything.
    Im sorry its so long but i felt like i would burst if i didnt tell you all i know you understand & as i said im here for ayou all.
    Here are some very gentle hugs (((((((((((((((.
    Fibrolady37.
  2. Cromwell

    Cromwell New Member

    You know you are such a decent person. You have such a lot to deal with. You deserve to be feeling better. Hugs to you.


    Love Anne Cromwell
  3. shootingstar

    shootingstar New Member

    I feel for you.

    Make a list of whatever medications and/or supplements you are taking, and research them to see if a side effect might be depression. If so you might need to make a change. Try to eat a well-balanced diet and get some light exercise every day if possible. Easier said than done I know.

    Best wishes.
  4. Fibrolady37

    Fibrolady37 New Member

    anne im so glad you replied thank you so much for your kind words they really mean a lot to me.
    Her are some very gentle hugs ((((((((((.
    Fibrolady37.
  5. smiffy79

    smiffy79 New Member

    hi again :)

    i think of my illnesses as my many headed beast - you cant take on the whole monster but deal with one head at a time :)

    sit down and dissect your illnesses one by one symptom by symptom. there you have your heads - tackle them one at a time, i know it sounds like a lot of work but it is well worth it
  6. charlenef

    charlenef New Member

    ther is a book out painfree 123 if you go to vitality101.com there is a christian dr ther that is the head of the fibro and cfs center around the u.s. they have tailored made programs.he even can treat you online check it out the web site is very useful from tests to have done to different meds good luck charlene
  7. im so sorry to hear that you are having a very hard time coping with this illness just now.if i had a magic wand..id cure all of us.

    i so know how you are feeling.i have more bad days, than good days.and ive told myself that nothing works better for this illness,THAN HAVING CARING,UNDERSTANDING FRIENDS ON THIS MESSAGE BOARD.

    please keep me informed as regards what your psychiatrist says when you see him.i only take amitripyline 1x 50mg tablet at night to help me sleep.im on nothing for my depression,its never been offered to me.im in the uk.

    ive often felt that i do need something to take for my depression as it gets worse as i get older.its with having to cope with the pain thats hard isnt it.its never ending,no matter what we try to better manage our illness.

    so please know that i care,and im thinking of you.

    gentle hugs (((( fibrolady37 ))))

    love fran
  8. pam_d

    pam_d New Member

    I can't even imagine what it would be like to have 41 illnesses, that is a lot to cope with on a daily basis.

    I only have 2 diagnoses, FM and Leukemia. I am coping pretty well, considering the latter may do me in.

    Keep working with your doctors, or try to find another doctor. My sister-in-law was seriously depressed, wouldn't leave the house, for years and finally in the last 6 months has found the right combo of meds and therapy---she is MUCH better, can go to restaurants, shopping etc. without being overwhelmed. This is HUGE for her. They are coming up with new meds all the time, so don't give up. In her case, it took a new psychiatrist to try some new & different meds.

    I hope things get better for you, I will say a prayer.

    (((Hugs)))
    Pam
  9. 1sweetie

    1sweetie New Member

    I am so sorry that it is so hard for you. I had read another thread that you posted that no one responds to you and I thought that was the one I was responding too. When I read this one, I knew I had the wrong post (LOL), you are messing with what is left of my brain.

    I do respond to you when I see your post. I am on and off the board because I can't on many days. I am not able to stay on the computer. The board moves so fast too.

    We are all in this together. I get real lonely and scared too. I come here to vent, get advice, and hopefully I may know of something that may help someone.

    The board is like life. Sometimes your feelings get hurt and sometimes you get angry but...it helps us more than it hurts us.

    Most of us have lots of problems and they are different yet alike. I wish I could be a better board member but sometimes my health and most of all my cognitive problems don't let me be the person here that I want to be...the same as in my real life.

    I do care about you and your problems. I have prayed for you many times. In fact, I had evidently missed some of your post and wondered if something was wrong with you.

    We all want you to feel better and to know you are cared about.

  10. carebelle

    carebelle New Member

    There are a lot of new things your Dr can try. I'm sharing some of my Hope with you today and Prayers of course :)
    Really sit and have a heart to heart with your Dr.this week. See what else you can try.

    I also was wondering if you have a problem with serotonin levels? This can really cause alot of problems .Getting your Depression back under control is the first thing you need to work on.

    I really really understand mine goes up and down for what seems like no reason at all.But then I'll realize I havent been sleeping and those serotonin levels are off.

    Maybe you need to come off of something ask your Dr.I think you can get an overload and things work in reverse sometimes.

    We all love you here let us know about your Dr apt and what you are doing .

    Start by taking each Illness you have and write the name out for it.Then write a blessing you have found that illness has brought into your life.The blessing could be a new friend or a visit to the Doctor on a beautiful Day to be out.

    Do not let any Negatives enter into your thoughts.Only search out happy things like maybe something you saw on the way to your doctors apt.that put a smile on your face.

    This is what I have been doing and it does help me cope some.Replacing bad thoughts with good ones .Positive Thinking.I deal with alot of pain 24-7. Now I try to be thankful in someway about that pain.Its a game kinda but retraining how we think I believe helps keep our minds busy.

    For example I medatate alot now to .That helps some of my FM pain.I thing about beautiful places and lovely weather.or old memories of family passed over .Everything has to be calming and peaceful.Try these things.

    Have a good day ! We care.








  11. Fibrolady37

    Fibrolady37 New Member

    shooting star thank you so much for your reply listing all my medication is a really good idea.
    Its so hard when we have these dds because i cant think straight & we need others to point things out to us.
    I wil do it now so i wont forget.
    Here are some very gentle hugs for you ((((((((((.
    Fibrolady37.
  12. Fibrolady37

    Fibrolady37 New Member

    smiffy79,
    Thank you for your reply & thank you for the advice its hard to think straight when youre depressed.
    May god bless you & yours.
    Fibrolady37.
  13. suzetal

    suzetal New Member

    I am so sorry your not feeling well.I am here if you need to chat.

    I am in and out all day.I am home alone so my day is spent at my PC.

    I had lots of problems with depression and I was bed ridden my first 2 yrs.

    I saw a new shrink almost 2 years ago he took me off efexor and put me on Cymbalta.Than my neurologist put me on 1800 mg a day of nueontrin.Took a few weeks but I am out of bed.

    I believe these two drugs have helped me.I would still be in bed unable to move or think straight.

    I know were all different and different treatments work for some but not others.

    I felt real lonely in the beginning cause I had a very good job and had lots of people contact.Thats all gone now.

    I try to be positive .I now sell on Ebay and play pogo.I get people contact that way.

    I hope you can feel better soon .Ill be thinking of you.

    For Every Day A New Dawn Will Come.
    Hugs()()()())()()()()()(Sue
  14. Fibrolady37

    Fibrolady37 New Member

    charlenef,
    Thank you so much for your reply its so good to hear from you.
    I will try the site you mentioned & se how i get on thanks.
    May god bless you & yours.
    Fibrolady37.
  15. Fibrolady37

    Fibrolady37 New Member

    fran,
    Thank you so much for your reply its so good to know my friends care it means so much to me.
    I get more bad days than good thats why im so depressed i hate being so tired & in such terrible pain.
    May god bless you & yourS.
    Fibrolady37.
  16. twinmomplus2

    twinmomplus2 New Member

    I read your post and I applaud you for reaching out when you probably want to slink away. You have so much to deal with.

    It is hard to figure out what came first, the depression, or everything else, but I tend to believe that we are depressed because of everything else we have to deal with. Doctors like to tell me that I feel pain and every other problem I have (migraines, PMDD...) because of depression, but I think it is the other way around). I wake up sometimes and try to figure out how I can just run away. Like "Fight or Flight instinct", sometimes I want to choose "flight" over "fight".

    I was once on Effexor Xr, and I remember very well one car ride whe I suddenly realized I felt great. I just turned to my son and said "Holy cow I feel so good". Then a couple months went by and I didn't feel so good anymore. I doubled my dose. Then doubled it again. I was taking so much and not feeling well anymore.

    So I tried to stop taking it. And here I am, this mom of four small kids, sitting at my kitchen table, breaking open effexor capsules and counting out the little dots inside like I was making a line of coke. It was so hard to get off the drug that I thought I would die. Each day I would take a few "dots" less. And I cried all day. It was awful.

    During that time, I quit my job, left my husband, and held my grandma in my arms while she died from a nasty fall and broken hip --because I forgot to check on her one day--

    One day I was off the pills. I told myself I would never do it again. I have just accepted that I will always be nervous, depressed, anxious.


    Do you tend to get worse during certain times of the month? I always did. I am taking a low dose birth control pill, that has eliminated 90% of my migraines and mood swings (aka manic/depressive episodes). It doesn't help with the all-over pain, but lowering my stress levels so it doesn't get unbearable is nice.

    Anyway, I just want you to know that you are not alone and I am also so frustrated with this world for not being able to make us feel better. You have my support, and please contact me if you need to talk.
    Kelly
  17. charlenef

    charlenef New Member

    hi, fibrolady i just printed out the blood test on the wedsite i gave you. im hoping when i go to the dr on tues day she can order them but i dont know. i also printed out a page on guafenisin to show to her she what she thinks. my stomach is pretty messed up and i just found some herbs that help me some so i want to see where that goes first before i try the gau since you can take herbs with it.i belong to friends with fibro also and my friend hazel writes gentle gentle fibro huggs for me because sometimes you cant even touch my skin. god bless charlene