I'm new at this, and could really use some support or encouragement. I've been ill for about 5 years and have been to many doctors who can't figure out what is wrong with me. I am exhausted most of the time (not just tired, exhausted to the bone) I hurt all over, in fact sometimes it hurts just to touch my skin. Many days I have to talk myself through even taking a shower and getting my kids ready for school. While my boss is very understanding, and lets me take naps when needed, he doesn't understand completely. He thinks I don't get enough exercise and that my diet is too restricted (I have allergies to over 50 foods). I know he gets frustrated with it. My husband gets frustrated because I can't stay awake during the early evening to take care of the kids, and that the house isn't always kept real neat. I feel like a horrible mother! He doesn't understand and just tells me to "deal with it." My present doctor just thinks it's depression and has put me on antidepressants, which have done nothing. I am going to see a new doctor on Monday. He is a wholistic M.D. I am hoping that he will at least be understanding and can give me some hope. I am frustrated because I can't stay asleep at night, but during the day, I can sit down and fall asleep at the drop of a hat. My hubby works 2nd shift, so I am alone with my kids in the evening. They are the ones who really suffer. I am blessed with great children, who are understanding, obedient (for the most part) and hate to watch t.v. programs that are violent, scary, or morally wrong. They police themselves well. It completely exhausts me to travel, which is a concern since my new doctor is 80 miles away. I can't go on family vacations because I can't keep up or function well. Unfortunately, my hubby doesn't understand and will not change the vacation destinations to do things in this area that I might be able to participate in. Instead, he takes is mom with him and the kids on vacation. And I end up feeling like a real heel since I don't go along. How can I explain to those I love what I am going through, and get them to understand that this is not in my head, that I really hurt, and I am am so exhausted sometimes all I can do is cry???? I feel like a complete failure at everything! HELP!!!