Insomnia Blog with a little sense or humour.

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Belinha, Sep 2, 2008.

  1. Belinha

    Belinha New Member

    I wrote this Blog for b4 my CFS diag. 09/02/08 11:55 AM

    Ahhh the blissfulness of being simple minded. March /2008
    Category: Life

    simple mind Not to offend anyone with that phrase but more to emphasize on the mind of the forever worrier, the insomniac, the super intelligent, the what I call myself "having the sponge syndrome". Just like those little flattened out sponges, all I need is a tiny drop and expand and absorb and thirst for more knowledge about everything. I can’t just focus on one and go on, oh no! That would just be to simple and too much to wish for, for me. I am constantly thinking on how things came to be what they are, and if one thought enters my mind there thousands behind questioning its being there. I watch my husband as he falls asleep not being able to understand how he can do that and blissfully say goodnight life, while I know he has a lot on his mind. He tells me that’s his time to sleep and that’s what he does with it. Meanwhile, I get up fifty times (yes I have tried all the sleeping pills in the world, meditation, yoga, mental visions of peace and beautiful things) nothing works. I am a worrier, a thinker, a creator, an inventor of reasons for why I can’t fall asleep. If I am lucky enough to fall asleep then I have very vivid dreams or nightmares that seem to last all night. So, I still wake up exhausted and wondering why? How I wich I could close my eyes and command my mind to go into blissful simple dreamless sleep. How I wish I could start one thing focus on it and not go on to something else ( I think that’s called multitasking and I do that a lot). How I wish sometimes I could be of simple mind and just be content with what is instead of what if?

    Thanks for reading. Belinha

    PS Sounds crazy doesn't it?

    [This Message was Edited on 09/03/2008]
    [This Message was Edited on 09/03/2008]
  2. 3gs

    3gs New Member

    Made me smile!

    Must be catching I could have written this!
    Told my neice I wished there was an off switch for the brain.

    Thanks for posting. 3gs
  3. RENA0909

    RENA0909 New Member

    This has been so well written Belinha and so true!

    I never thought of myself as near genius before and as I have just gotten out of bed at 2.10am UK time and made myself a nice cup of tea I thought I would respond to you!

    I also could have written this (not as well as you lol)about the insomnia that we suffer from.

    The last few months have been horrible for me as I have had so many nights were I do not sleep at all!!!

    About 5 nights ago I was awake for 33 hours non stop and usually I sleep a lot next day because I am so tired but I could not that time.How weird is that?

    I also have the nightmares and dreams which feel so real.I have also had that sleep paralysis!When you know you are awake but you CANNOT move your body.YUK!Scary that one.

    So now I will stay here for hours just thinking about nothing and everything and hoping to crash out sometime before morning!!

    Night Night


  4. heapsreal

    heapsreal New Member

    Most people say that if i have cfs that should be sleeping all the time, suppose most people dont really know.

    I tell them 'Im tired but wired' , plus all the aches and pains, they like to keep us awake, lol.
  5. Belinha

    Belinha New Member


    I'm glad you enjoyed my little insomnia blog, I also wrote one on aging. I do it on
    What brought me to write to you was the fact that you said you hadn't slept for 33 hours. In the hurricanes of 2004 my son the first boy to turn 18, moved away on a venture with his long time buddy, out ot conquer the world, and the hurricanes hit and I had no idea where they were and the devastation was tremendous, signs down, curfews, trees on houses, etc... I could sleep, for 8-9 days not a wink. My husband worked days and my younger son went to school, I couldn't work because the property I managed of 486 flats was almost completely destroyed. My husband and son thought I must be sleeping during the day, until my daughter showed up, she had a key, and watch me trying to watch my beautiful down comforter in the pull along with all the other bedding. I still remember all the dilusions, but in my mind they were real, you see I got in my head that the taliban was running a brothel in my house and my bed had a strange smell of drug/rundown/prostitution and since I was delirious and delusional I forgot where my laundry room was and that's way I was trying to wash everything in the pool. My daughter asked me when was the last time you ate and slept? I answered I couldn't because the taliban had my older son hostage and wanted to take my family away so I stayed awake night and day to try and protect them. My daughter called my husband, very adamantly on my part they literally took me to the hospital, where I was diagnosed with sleep depravation, was given something by IV and slept for 5 days and nights with my husband at my side.
    Sorry I had to be so descriptive but I almost went insane and wanted to make sure you knew the consequences of non sleep and how quickly the dilusions can take over.
  6. 3gs

    3gs New Member

    Usually I go without or very little sleep then crash.
    for some weird reason this flare is keeping me up for days . Feel very agigated and settle down and pain won't respond to meds.

    Noticed that Im starting to get weird things going on. Not making sense . Didn't know you could go to hospital and say knock me out.
  7. lilchisler

    lilchisler New Member

    Hi there,
    I don't post much but am always here. My nickname on all of my emails is "ol up all night".

    Even with lots of meds, I have never slept more than about 5 hours a night and that is interrupted at least once a night.

    I laughed at the "sponge" part of your story, because I no longer fight the awake time at 3 in the morning.

    I get up, make a cup of coffee, take a pain pill and for about an hour, research whatever the last thing on my mind was before I went to bed.

    I tell everyone, that I have my PhD, from being on line so much in the middle of the night and I am now working on my "Thesis",,,haha,

    Anyway, I am not so much a worrier, but I cannot stand to be uninformed. I seem to have to research everything.

    I know I am off a abit, but it keeps my mind off of myself.

    Your stories are so funny and true,please keep making us laugh.

    We all need that.


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