Irratated and ticked by family members who think they know it all

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by rosemarie, Jun 16, 2006.

  1. rosemarie

    rosemarie Member

    Ok I have just been shoved over my breaking point.
    I am so tried of friends, family , and who ever else I meet that thinks that they know more about how I feel and how to CURE me of my fibro and the rest of my pain.

    One cousin called and informed me that her friend had fibro really bad , to the point that she could not longer get out of bed. But then she found this diet and gave it a try and you guessed it she was CURED!.

    Some of the diet was that you ate no while bread, no white sugar, no white rice, very little carbs, no eggs, icecream , well milk products in general, NO red meat. LIttle chicken .
    The biggest part of the protien came from Fresh fish and it too was limited in how much you could eat. NO soda, no coffee, no tea, execpt for the herb teas and then you had to watch out and not use any sweetner in them, NO fake sugar.

    Very limited fats,no potatoes white ones, no red skinned potatoes, no diet drinks, filltered water. LIttle carbs, and then they had to be whole grained with NO sugar or honey in them. Limited fruits with low glocuse content. , no smooties as they contain sugar and honey and sometimes artifucal sweetners.

    My cousin told me that this friend of hers went on this diet and I forgot the exercise program that went with it. YOu have to exercise at least 30 minutes a day, it can be brisk walking, riding a bike , lifting weights. just so that you get in al the exdercise oyou need to have to do this probram, of course she lost so much weight and with this diet and esercise program she is now CURED of her fibro.! Ain't that just dandy.

    At somepoint in this diet she stopped taking all her narcoitc pain meds and antidepression meds too.And she lost about 50-70 lbs in 7 months.

    So then she tells me that I need to try this diet. And when I aksed about it she said that you cut out any thing that is white , red, and has carbs in it. I hope that I misunderstood and it was that you cut back on these foods.

    And now she is doing great , no fatique , no aches or pains, no fibro at all she is just CURED YEH!!!

    But will this work for me? NO way. I could not do this kind of radical diet and esericse programs becasue I would be so sick that I would be unable to move.

    Then I get the other stories that I just need to eat right lots of fruits, veggis, little red meat, chicken and fish and lots of blue berries as they are good for you. I need to esercise too and I need to cut back on the NARCOTIC's. And I will jusr feel so much better. REALLY WILL I?

    Isn't there just something that I can follow that does not take every food I like to eat away from me. And not being able to eat white rice , I am to not eat anything that is made with any thing white in it flour ,sugar, salt. If I had to eat like this I would starve my self. And be sick all the time.

    I would like to know just how it is that everyone who does not haev fibro knows what to do to cure it. And there are so many ways to do this that I lost count of them. How do they know where I hurt, or what esercise I do will cause me to have more pain? How do they know that just making my bed wears me out so much that I have to stop and rest after making it.?

    So do they klnow just what I really have to live with? I have fibro but Chronic MEYofacial Pain syndrome, arthritis in left wrist that has a titatuim plate and 6 screws in it, athritis in my knees , ankles, hips, and back, I also have degenerative disc disease, spinal stenosis, fact syndrome, lumbar radulopathy, 2 bulding discs, sicatia, knee pain , muscle spaams, asthma, COPD, and what ever else there is that makes me so tired and fatiqued.

    I have been told so many things on who i cna be cured from this fibro and all the rest of the things I have.
    If I don't know what is going tomake me feel better and somewhat rested. Then where do they get off in telling me that I need . How can they tell me that I will be CURED from all my pzin? Who are these doctors and nurse's that are making UP these diets for me.

    Where did all these people who have come off the street gonne to school to learn all that they need to know about fibro and the rest of the chronic pain symdromes to make up a good nutrianal diet that will help me to repare the things that are wrong with me. ?

    And why is iit that all the people we talk with that don't have fibro can tell us how to cure it?
    It is so strange for me to think that some one who has never taken any thing more than a over the counter pain medication can tell me that I am taking too much of my narcoitc pain pills and that they know all that is right for me to do ?

    I know all the conditions that I have to live with and yet I don't know what diet I should uuuse to help me with all the fatique and pain that I have. I am far from ahving any awnsers taht will be helpfull for me and will make me feel better?
    Have I missed something some where , like the instructions for how to live with fibro and cmp and all other cronic pain issues for my chronic pain.

    I really would like to have the understanding of all the condidions that I have and to make my life bearable to just live with what I have. I am just a small part of a many p eople who live with fibro and other chronic pain conditions and I don 't have the answer that I need to send of to others and tell them that if you would only do this you will be cured and out of pain for ever.

    Still have many questions and things I don't know aobut?
    Rosemarie {Sorry thta this post is very long.
  2. mrsjethro

    mrsjethro New Member

    Rosemarie,
    That's all right darlin', get it out. It helps and they don't seem to mind when I do that here either.

    I have a lot of the same encounters, only they get mad at me then, when I'm having what I believe is a flare and I'm not ready to just jump right up and go have the pins stuck all over my body from the accupuncture, that they think will magically cure me. I know where you are coming from and I could feel your emotion as I read what you typed. I could actually visualize you there typing it. I've done it myself a few times.

    I keep trying to believe that one day all of these well meaning people will take the time to do a little research or readinig and just try the tiniest bit to understand what this is like for us. I don't want someone to keep making all of these suggestions and getting mad at me for not jumping right up and doing them. I just want them to try to understand that they are only adding to our stress by doing this. If they would put as much effort into that as they do trying to convince us of all of these miracle cures, we'd all be a whole lot better off.

    Now, you have made me so hungry from naming all of those foods above, I think I'll go and order a pizza.....
    Maybe that will cure me.

    ps. I'm not knocking accupuncture, I'm just not quite ready for it myself, yet. I know that a lot of people really do get relief from it.
    [This Message was Edited on 06/16/2006]
  3. 1975jet

    1975jet New Member

    Try and take it all with a grain salt... some of my family memebers do not understand.... I have always been the 'strong' one in the family and I have learned over the last couple of years I don't say too much to some family members and friends or at least people that I thought were friends.

    It is a real illness-what works for some don't work for others, and that is the same with alot of illnesses out there. Keep updating and keep letting your feelings out-this board is helping me already, hon.

    God Bless
  4. azbubba

    azbubba New Member

    ...because I almost made the same post today.

    But since I was too tired to do it, thank you for doing it for me.

    I've been dx'd with FM for about 3 weeks...and already have had a TON of suggestions of what I'm supposed to do. I feel like telling them all to take a 4 ft. walk off a 3 ft. plank.

    Part of the thing I'm wondering about though...is that right now, I'm just trying to determine what FM means to be...how my life will be affected, etc. And I don't even want to work on management. NOT to say I'll be stuck here, but right now, I just don't wanna hear about the latest 'cure' someone has by cutting all wheat, sugar, and broccoli from my diet (yes, I'm kiddin about the broccoli.)

    My judgement about myself is that how I'm feeling right now is, if not normal, acceptable, as long as I don't stay here. But, for right now, if I could post a sign on my forehead it would be 'KEEP YOUR @#$#!! CURES TO YOURSELF!!!'

    Hugs,
    Bubba
  5. NyroFan

    NyroFan New Member

    Rosemarie:

    My doctor told me there is no cure to FM yet. He told me eat 'normally' but in small portions. And take meds as prescribed.

    I believe him. I do not see any cure on the horizon.


    nyrofan