Is this "only" CFS or something else?

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by CinCA, Dec 8, 2005.

  1. CinCA

    CinCA New Member

    Are my swings in energy level and tolerance for stress, etc. related to CFS? Is it also responsible for the memory lapses and "brain fog", where sometimes I can't even remember if my contacts are still in or read a digital clock? What about zero appetite and food really upsetting my stomach when I do eat? My nerves are so "raw" the slightest thing makes me jump, I am wound up so tight, and I get overstimmed sensory-wise on a daily basis now. We are moving in a couple months d/t hubby's job (I don't want to now, but he won't back out of this), and for the past several weeks I've had to coordinate getting a new roof, new paint, and having to babysit contractors more than I would have liked. I've also had virtually zero peace and quiet for over two weeks...I have had a LOT of dust, dirt, very loud noise, and just a big mess on my hands (I am a super clean freak, too, although I have tried hard to let it go). Throw in a 4 y.o. high-functioning autistic daughter who is soooo defiant and prone to acting out (and also never stops moving or talking, ever), a super-stressed and argumentative hubby, and I am ready to snap.

    Is all this par for the course for CFS? Can I do anything about the "fragility" I feel, as I am to the point I have no idea how I'll be able to handle the impending move? I am taking some supplements and homeopathics...I am very leery of pharmaceuticals as my body is flooded with toxins (my adrenals are fried, too) and I seem to get bad side effects from even OTC stuff these days (I have had a history of bad reactions to pharmaceuticals my whole life).

    Any info would help. How do you deal with this when you need to just STOP but your life responsibilities insist you keep going 300 mph 24 x 7? It's not like I can just stop caring for my daughter, and helpful family won't just appear out of nowhere. I have my kid in school 4 days a week (and it will be 5 in the pre-K class when we move), and she is even staying late this month 'cause of all the contractors/workers, but I still am more stressed than ever. I know it's nothing compared to the challenges many of you are facing/have faced, but all this is getting me completely unglued.

    Thanks for anyone's advice, and I hope you all find ways to cope with and recover from your own health issues, too.

    C.
  2. CinCA

    CinCA New Member

    No, I have no family who can help, at all. My mom is 2000 miles away and has her own issues (she also cannot handle our daughter...she came out a year ago so hubby and I could travel and was at her wits' end within 4 days). The in-laws are an hour away but never have helped at all and that will never change. I also have no friends who can help with stuff...believe me, I've tried to ask when I have been really, really sick. So I am on my own.

    I had planned to work outside on my poor garden, which is a mess in its own right, when the roof was being done. But it was such a mess (esp. scraping off the original tar/rock one which was under the composite shingle one...rocket science from the prev. owners' re-roofers). Black tar-dust as well as clumps of tar/rock, and of course shingle bits everywhere, and then when they started laying the new tile, it was just constant pounding (although not nearly as bad as when they stripped off the old roof), and it was too hazardous being outside, as there were nails and bits of tiles flying everywhere, it seemed. This week, the outside is being painted, and I am literally plastic-wrap-trapped inside the house (all windows and doors are covered), except for the garage. The color we picked ended up way too light/pastel-y, and my painter blew a gasket this morning when I said we wanted to change it (they had painted maybe 1/3 of the house). I even was able to switch the existing paint color (we just went one shade darker) and took care of getting all the new paint myself (and paying for it), but he still just wigged. I was like, "I do NOT need this right now, and don't mess with the CFS psycho chick", although I bit my tongue and tried to be professional and come across like I wasn't utterly crazy.

    Hubby says get out of the house, go to the gym, whatever, but I feel like I need to be here to supervise all these people. They've been asking me questions, etc., almost constantly, and I can tell they need me to keep an eye on everything. So much for getting my stuff done, as I had planned. I'm hoping maybe I can do the garden stuff next week, when the inside will be painted (that I am NOT looking forward to), but we'll see. It's incredibly disruptive, esp. as we did almost 100% of our renovation work ourselves and only used one trusted tile guy, who's now our good friend, to help.

    I'm to the point I am almost ready to ask a doctor for some sort of sedative med/Klonopin, whatever, as I am so wound up and feel my nervous system/adrenals have a life of their own. But I haven't even seen an MD in years (switched to a naturopath), and I am not up for trying to find a new one now. Plus, I am so trying to stay off the drug regimen. I do have an appt. with my naturopath tomorrow, after my daughter's ballet class, and taking her to the mall to see Santa, and before her neighbor friend's BD party later in the afternoon. Then, this weekend our daughter is in "The Nutcracker", so we have those shows at 2 on Sat. & Sun. Then next week the inside is supposed to be painted (we are so not ready...house is a mess), and of course the following weekend I got ANOTHER BD party invitation (that makes 3 just for Dec.). Throw in the holiday stuff, hubby's BD Dec. 28th, and our realtor pushing us to get our house on the market (and hubby wanting to before Xmas), and I really AM ready to dig a hole in the backyard and crawl into it!

    Sorry to vent/ramble so much...I am so stressed and really have NO ONE to talk to about any of this (we can't really even "tell" anyone we're moving yet, because of some ongoing confidentialty/3rd party negotiation stuff). So thank you for letting this be an outlet! And thanks, Marsha, for the reply and helpful advice. I'll do what I can.

    C.
  3. lenasvn

    lenasvn New Member

    I have no advice at all, but you sure need a break, and a big hug. I wish tranquilizers we're available and legal, you could then use it on all those workers and_____ (fill in blank). Ahhh, inlaws! How frustrating, that must cause you to feel resentment,,?
  4. Mikie

    Mikie Moderator

    If ones does not listen to one's body and stop trying to do too much when fatigued, the body will become so fatigued and sick that one will end up bedridden. Then, it can take years to claw one's way back, if at all. Listen to your body; it's telling you something important.

    Love, Mikie
  5. gvmeabrk

    gvmeabrk New Member

    Mikie is right it will win out! You have to take some time off do some things that are relaxing and more pleasant for a few days and you should go back to the grind feeling a bit more refreshed not much but a little.That is the thing we all have to learn is to know when enough has been enough.When I get this way I skip out on most things except my daughter! My ex and I were contractors for drywall and have also done roofing and just speaking from a contractors point of view I don't think they will be to upset over a disapearing act for a day or two lol!If you see that they have been compitant thus far it is likely you will have a finished job that that will be to your satisfaction.If you are hanging around because you feel they are not compitant then you should maybe get someone else...that would take away some of the worries.If you feel they are doing a fine job then go do your own thing for awhile just leave them with a number where they can reach you if there is a question.But being in that environment is not healthy and you should not be in it when avoidable.That alone will make you feel ill!Try to go to bed the same time every night,take a good vitamin,eating a few less bad carbs seems to give me extra energy.If you can squeeze in a nap just even 30 min helps try that.But honestly I know from the sounds of this that you are heading right for trouble and it is so hard to bring yourself up once you are there.The worst part is you get to that breaking point and don't even realize it til it is to late!TAKE A BREAK LOL!
    [This Message was Edited on 12/09/2005]
  6. CinCA

    CinCA New Member

    At least not for the next week or so. Honestly, my time online is a "break" for me, and I do that every single day. There is way too much to do to get our house on the market, something that must be done ASAP because of the job schedule thing w/ hubby. There are also the holidays, that necessitate a few things (believe me, Xmas is VERY small for us this year)...at least I pounded out the cards last night. And the contractor thing will go on for at least another week, and I do need to be around to answer questions/make sure everything is okay (they want my opinion and feedback).

    Next week, when they move inside, I'll likely move out and tackle the mess of a once-beautiful garden, as that has to be done too. Being outside, even though there is so much to do it stresses me out, is really good for me, and I can get into a rhythm with my MP3 player. Once that's done, I will try to get to the gym and at least do maybe 10-15 mins. of super-slow/mild cardio or maybe do a light swim or sit in the sauna (we're lucky...our local "chain" gym happens to be new and very nice). Those things make me feel better too. It's just the past several weeks have been utterly chaotic! At least hubby is starting to get it...he took the day off today to help me and supervise things so I get a break.

    Gotta run and take my daughter (and me) to our naturopathic doctor...it's been a few months and we need to stop in. Then we're going to see Santa, grab a smoothie, come home for a bit, and go to a neighbor friend's BD party. Busy, but all good stuff, and it's better than stressing over the painters (who all did show up today...yay!).

    Thanks for all of the helpful advice, and believe me, I'll get a break as soon as I can and try to squeeze in some smaller things in the meantime. Hope everyone has a good weekend!

    C.
  7. springrose22

    springrose22 New Member

    CFS is a very complex and debilitating disease if you do not listen to your body, which is telling you to SLOW down drastically. As Mikie said above, you can end up bedridden, if you don't rest, rest, rest. Sounds like you need to educate those around you so that they realize that you are ill, and could get much worse if you are not careful. Love, Marie