I've Not Been On Board For Weeks: MIL Died and Been Sick

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by JLH, Jul 28, 2007.

  1. JLH

    JLH New Member

    I've missed being able to read everybodys posts on the board for the last few weeks!

    My mother-in-law, who lived just two houses down the road from me, died on July 13th. She was almost 87 and had had a massive heart attack about four weeks prior to her death and just was not strong enough to recover.

    Her illness caused my husband and I to spend more time down at her house than normal--well, he always checked in on him mom and dad--his dad is 92--but I never went to the house very often over the last couple years because of my inability to walk well.

    So, it's been pretty tough on me physically. Every day that I went down to her house, I spent 15+ hours in bed the following day. I would be so wiped out that I even SLEPT the entire 15+ hours in bed, too! I would get up for a trip to the bathroom, then right back to bed and back to sleep.

    I was really dreading the visitation and funeral because I didn't know how I could stand up and walk into the funeral home, even using my cane or rollator, but my daughter took me in my wheelchair, so that made it much better. I just hated to sit in a wheelchair next to the casket and have everyone ask about my health when they were coming there to pay their respects for my MIL.

    I hope I am able to check into the board for short periods of time here in the future!

    Wishes for good health to everyone!

    Love and Hugs,
  2. findmind

    findmind New Member

    My sincere condolences to you and your family.

    You slept because you needed the sleep!
    Otherwise, you wouldn't have slept, just crashed and rested.

    Your FIL is grateful for all your help, I'm sure. He is old and I'm afraid for him now that his wife is gone.

    Many couples pass on very close together, so take good care of him and you also.

    Again, I'm sorry for your loss.

  3. ckball

    ckball New Member

    I had noticed you had been gone, I am so sorry about your MIL. Findmind was right about your FIL, he may need more attention now since he is alone.

    I am sorry you have to push yourself so hard, then we crash hard. I hope you can get some rest and start feeling better soon. I can imagine all this of has been very hard on you. Take care, we look forward to seeing your daily inspirational postings- Prayers and hugs to you-Carla
  4. sisland

    sisland New Member

    So Sorry to Hear the News! My Deepest Sympathy for you and your Family! Hope things get back to normal for all soon!,,,,,,,,,,,,,,Hugs!,,,,,,Sis
  5. fivesue

    fivesue New Member

    My sincere condolences to you and your family for the loss of your MIL...

    And, you, my dear, need to rest. Please take care of yourself. I am glad that your were able to attend the services with the help of a wheelchair and your dear daughter.

    Please take time to recover both physically and mentally. I'm sure that your FIL will need help at some point, but you need to take care of yourself so you can help others.

    Again, my best wishes to you and your family.

  6. laceymae

    laceymae New Member

    I am so sorry for your loss...

    we just buried my aunt this week after her 4 year battle with cancer.

    I know this is a very stressful time, I was sure I would be in the bed after this past week, but then we got robbed and I guess my anger has motivated me...

    I'm sure I'll crash shortly though.

    take care of yourself and here is a special soft hug...

  7. ksp56

    ksp56 Member

    I am sorry about your MIL's death. I will prayer for each of you.

    Please do take care of YOU. I know how debilitating stress and taking care of other's can be. Be kind to you, and whatever it takes for you to feel better, listen to your body...

    Gentle hugs,

  8. JLH

    JLH New Member

    Thank you all so much. It has been a stressful time here for my husband and children. All of my children used to get off of the school bus at my MIL's when I worked and they were too young to stay at home by themselves. She pampered all of them to the hilt, so they really had a special place in their heart for their grandmother.

    My children are 34, 30, and 27 now, but grew up to "pay back" their grandmother's kindesses by helping to take care of her. They looked in on her often, took her food, did chores around the house for her when they could, etc. I am very proud of all of them. My daughter who is the physician always made sure she was well taken care of when she was in the hospital and visited her every day when she was there doing her "rounds".

    My FIL is so frail (he's 92) and can't remember that she has died. He roams the house every day looking for her and when he is reminded that she has died, he cries. It is so sad.

    I believe, as some of you said, that he will grieve himself to death and not be here with us much longer either.

    Again, thank you all for your kind words.

    Love and Hugs,