Joke Scottish Slang

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by paulmack, Dec 4, 2006.

  1. paulmack

    paulmack New Member

    A wee Glesga(Glasgow) wumman(woman) goes intae a butchershop,where the butcher has just came oot the freezer,and is standin' hauns(hands) ahint(behind) his back,with his erse(rear) aimed at an electric fire.

    The wee wumman checks oot the display counter then asks,

    "Is that yer Ayrshire Bacon?"

    "Naw",replies the butcher

    "it's jist ma hauns am heatin'"

  2. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    like that one needs a wee deoch an Doris.
  3. paulmack

    paulmack New Member

    Hey rockgor
    "come awa' my lad an' take a wee drappie mair"

    It's a bit early for that where you are rockgor.LOL,cheers Paul
  4. paulmack

    paulmack New Member

    Laughter is the only medicine i'm allowed to dispense.
    Glad u enjoyed it fight4acure.It's the only thing that keeps me sane i think,LOL,Paul
  5. kholmes

    kholmes New Member

    That one has me snorting.

    The best-laid schemes o' mice an' men
    gang aft a-gley!
  6. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    Bring some of your jokes to the porch. Humor is much appreciated there.

    There must be an appropriate lightbulb joke. How many Scotts does it take to change a porchlight?
  7. paulmack

    paulmack New Member

    None,cos they're never on,LOL.

    I've seen the Porchlight posts.Is that an American thing???
  8. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    on the net.

    Only takes two, but it takes a long time. They're so busy arguing over who's buying the lightbulb.

    Yes, in bygone days many American homes had a porch. Folks would sit outside, sometimes in a swing, and chat w/ passing neighbors.

    A nice place to rest and socalize, maybe cool off if there was a breeze.
  9. paulmack

    paulmack New Member

    Hi rockgor,nice one.

    I'll have to join you all in the porch very shortly.PORCHLIGHT-sounds like an important place of ENLIGHTENMENT,LOL.