just diagnosed and ??????

Discussion in 'General Health & Wellness' started by gwelynn, Jan 12, 2009.

  1. gwelynn

    gwelynn New Member

    How in the world do I get family, friends and co-workers to stop looking at me like I'm a hypochondriac?! And I'd love to hear from anyone who handles this illness and doesn't lose their job due to frequent, random, sick days. I know that it's time for me to start thinking more about me and less about being everything to everyone else, but my family is quite used to me being the "rock" in all things. Boy do I need some input from veteran fibro patients!
  2. rockgor

    rockgor Well-Known Member

    Is that a Welsh name? Welcome to the board. Lots of nice people here to talk to.

    Are you now partially disabled? Probably will mean lots of changes in your life.

    First of all, you can't control other people. Some of them will probably will never under-
    stand what's going on. If you like, you can tell them the spoons theory. See

    http://www.butyoudontlooksick.com/the_spoon_theory/

    May help. Maybe not. But whatever other people think, you have to start doing what's
    good for you. If you've been a perfectionist, you can't be anymore. If you've been the
    person who takes charge of things, you can't do that anymore either. Big changes.

    You have to start saying NO to all kinds of requests. When people ask you to do what you
    used to do, you have to say, Maybe you (or Jane or Steve or 6 other people) could do that
    this year.

    If you look at my profile, you can see some books listed re: saying No. You need to really
    choose what you will attempt and what you won't even try anymore.

    It is also very hard to schedule any activity. Like going to lunch or a movie. Most friends
    can't deal with this and gradually fade away. Some relatives act like the disease might be
    catchy and tend to stay away too.

    Perhaps you live where there is some sort of support group or 12 step program.

    Good luck

    Rock