Just did what was right, but nerves are shot need help

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by jenn_c, Sep 8, 2008.

  1. jenn_c

    jenn_c New Member

    My best friend suffers numerous medical issues and psych issues. They were not as severe as they are now. She has been suicidal in the past and her outbursts have gotten extreme. To the point it is causing me incredible stress = pain and fatigue. I also am afraid to have her watch my son. I have to go to NY tomorrow AM. My husband is going in late to work now to be here to put my son on the bus. I just had to tell her that and why.

    She got very mad and I told her that I wasn't angry, I want her to get better. But That Until that has happend I can;tand my kids can't be around her. She said that by me doing this was going to make it worse for her. I told her that I am not responsible for her actions. I am not responsible to make her do anything, She needs to accept responsability for herself. Her husband, mother or me can not make her healthy, she has to do it for herself. She continued to grasp at straws and I remained strong. I live next door.

    My nerves are shot to hell. I know I did what was right in my mind. I have to get my emotions to agree. I need some help or assurance please.

  2. cordy250

    cordy250 Member

    sometimes you have to use tough love. Your first priority is to protect your family regardless of who gets their feelings hurt.

    Maybe it will help her in the long run and she will see that it did and thank you. If not, well, it has to be a person's decision to get better. Others cannot do that for them.

    Sounds like you did what you had to do.

    [This Message was Edited on 09/09/2008]
  3. sisland

    sisland New Member


    Rest assured that how you feel is right!,,,You are definetly not responsible for her health!,,,,and you have every right to not have her watch your son!,,,,,some people like to send others on guilt trips,,,,,Don't fall for it! you are a strong person and your Family comes first!,,,,,,,,,,,,Goodluck,,,,S

    [This Message was Edited on 09/09/2008]
  4. whoachief

    whoachief New Member

    you did the right thing! Hopefully this "tough love" will help her in the long run. HANG IN THERE!
  5. jenn_c

    jenn_c New Member

    Thank God for you guys. Your my little guardian angels sitting on my shoulder. Took some anxiety meds and a nap. No wthat I have done that and read your sweet emails, I know I'll have a better day. Jenn
  6. 3gs

    3gs New Member

    You did the right thing.

    My friend/neighbor was like this and she drove me nuts. I tried to be understanding and talked to her about behavior(one incident was her drunk around my gkids).

    She would get it but then go right back into her pattern. Finally I had to tell her to leave me alone. I already was under a great deal of stress and couldnt deal anymore with her issuses.

    Think they call this toxic people.
    It was hard (since they live next door)but it was best for me and her.

    Your safety and babys are what matter.
  7. gapsych

    gapsych New Member

    I would go with your gut feelings.

    Like you said you are not her keeper. You need to focus on yourself and your family.

    She may not realize that her behavior is so irresponsible.

    That is scary.

    I hope she gets help.

    You have done the right thing.