Looking for my motivation...

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by JP, Oct 28, 2002.

  1. JP

    JP New Member

    Hello all,

    I could use a little help in the motivation department. I hardly leave my home and I spend most of my time alone. It feels pretty safe and it's not much of a life right now. Any words of wisdom out there?

    Thank you,
    Jan
  2. JP

    JP New Member

    Hello all,

    I could use a little help in the motivation department. I hardly leave my home and I spend most of my time alone. It feels pretty safe and it's not much of a life right now. Any words of wisdom out there?

    Thank you,
    Jan
  3. Duffsangel

    Duffsangel New Member

    Try going out at least once a day. Even if it for a drive. Go to the park, or the library. Go walk thru Wal-Mart. I think just seeing other people sometimes helps me out of a funk. Surround yourself with friends and family. This disease is hard enough to deal with...don't do it alone!
    Take care of YOU!
    Duff
  4. JP

    JP New Member

    Hi Duff,

    Thanks so much for your kind words...I will take your advice. I actually just got back from a walk and feel a wee bit better.

    Jan
  5. RoseTx

    RoseTx New Member

    Jan, when it feels like I am never going to feel well again, I set minimum goals for myself. I try to set reachable goals. For a long time (Summer is hard for me) my goal was to get out of bed, make up the bed and put on some clothes. I had to do at least that much. Walking is great. Don't try jogging, it will just make you hurt worse. But go out for a short stroll. Walk around the block. Sometimes I just go to a thrift shop and poke around in the junk. If there is anyway on earth to volunteer, do it. I teach Sunday School class on Sunday. I teach the children so I don't have to go to a lot of trouble but it gives me something to look forward to at least once a week. Hope this is helpful. Hugs, Rose
  6. JP

    JP New Member

    Hi Rose,

    Goals are good. Even small ones are productive and will help to make me feel better. Thank you so much for your words of wisdom.

    Hugs,
    Jan
  7. Shirl

    Shirl New Member

    I agree with Rose, set small goals, and try to keep them. I do that all the time. Sometimes I make it, other times I don't, but at least its something to look forward to.

    Like you, I spend most of my time alone, my husband works for an oil company so he is gone a lot. I have five dogs, so they do keep me motivated, whether I feel like it or not, I feed, water and take care of them! Of course the return from them is great, they love me no matter how I feel or look, or what mood I am in too.

    When my husband is home, he 'drags' me out! I would just love to stay in my 'safe' place (home) all the time. My daughter picks up the job of getting me out of the house when her Dad is not here.

    I am not lonely, I love my quiet life now, I read a lot, only watch certain shows on tv, the computer, and try to keep the house as best I can. I do miss all the gardening I can't do anymore, and all the church work I also can't handle now. But I do try to keep busy as much as my energy will allow.

    Try to get out at least for a couple of hours each week, that way you won't tired yourself and get discouraged. Its an effort, but it does help us to go out to eat, shop and whatever you like to do.

    Like Rose, I love rumminging through Thrift stores and Antique shops, its always a 'trip down memory lane for me'! My husband says that I have more fun in a thrift store/antique shop than in the Mall, and its not so stressful!

    I live in the country, so my mailbox is a block up the driveway, so that is my exercise each day, and on a cool day, I walk around the grounds here, thats about all the exercise I can do without a lot of back pain. It helps, my blood pressure is great!

    Wal-Mart I hate, too big, and too many people, I take the low road if possible and stay in small stores that don't exaust me.

    HOpe this helps a little, I know how it feels, sometimes you just feel like life is passing you by, but it really isn't, as long as we are living and breathing, then we know that we are alive!

    Take care, if I can help, please email me anytime at ShirlShalom@aol.com

    Shalom, Shirl


    [This Message was Edited on 10/28/2002]
  8. JP

    JP New Member

    I sure enjoyed your words of kindness and wisdom. I love my quiet time too. I just have so much of it! Thank you for offering your email address. Making connections is so important.

    Be well,
    Jan
  9. selma

    selma New Member

    ((((((((BEEN THERE DONE THAT)))))))))))))))))))

    I understand and am in the same boat,so to speak. I hate being on a boat. friends take a lot of energy.

    Plan
    Prioritize
    Predict
    Pray

    Then go for it in small steps. By doing above you won't do too much, or too little.

    Love and hugs, Selma
  10. marinemom

    marinemom New Member

    Hi

    Thought I'd share this story with you. Years ago (too many to count) I used to cut hair for a living. I had one customer that came in and he was pretty down. His love life sucked, he didn't think he was good looking enough, etc., etc.

    Anyway, I told him to go to the mall and just sit on a bench somewhere. It didn't matter where, but just sit and watch.

    Now, I know I'm going to offend someone here with this next statement, but here goes.

    I told him that the longer he sat there, the better looking he would be and he would start to feel better about himself. The next time he came in, he told me that he had done just what I told him, and I was right. Not to be judgmental or anything, but you can ALWAYS find someone who you just know you are better looking than.

    Sound bad? Maybe, but it does work. You don't hurt anyone by doing this, and it's just a tool to boost your own self esteem and also gets you out of the house without using too much energy.

    I, now, have to take my own advice and do that too. Only, now I find myself playing guessing games, like are they buying a gift for a girlfriend/boyfriend. Doesn't that couple look good together, and sometimes the ugly "how did SHE get HIM?"

    Anyway, just thought I'd pass that along.

    Again, I'm sorry if I offended anyone. That wasn't my intention, so please forgive.

    Kathy
  11. JP

    JP New Member

    Thanks for your support. Each of you have good suggestions and coping skills. Sounds like the mall idea was a good suggestion for you client. We can always find many things to be grateful for.

    Thanks again!
    Jan