LOW POINT AGAIN...getting tired of all this!!!!

Discussion in 'Spirituality/Worship' started by another_painful_day, May 13, 2004.

  1. another_painful_day

    another_painful_day New Member

    Im really at a very dark and low point as usual. Im sure the sleep deprivation and having no Me-Time, and taking on more work isnt helping my health any...mental or physical. Im tired of crying so much lately...everything is very over-whelming to me even something as simple as running to the store for milk. The kids crazy schedules with sports and all the extra "family" activites EVERY weekend like weddings, baby showers, birthdays etc....all so overwhelming to me. Sometimes I just want the world to stop moving for one second but it all seems in fast foward.

    Ive been praying in the morning as I drive to my job to please let the day end fast...I pray when I TRY to go to bed at night for the night to S T R E T C H as much as it can so I can finally get sleep and the next momment after that I hear the alarm go off...

    The first thought in my head when I open my eyes in the morning is "OH MY GOD HOW WILL I GET THRU ANOTHER DAY......"....it actually takes my breath away thinking about it.

    Please someone say a prayer for me. I feel like Im going insane...there are times especially lately that I am so exhausted that I wish "something" would occur to me that would force me to have to stay in bed for a few days (weeks maybe even LOL!) so I can have a break from all this and get some rest.

    I feel so alone again....

    Im tired of crying....

    And when Im this tired and exhausted and in pain and cant function, I feel like such a failure for not being "Super" Woman. Why cant I just be able to juggle like some super moms/wives and do it with a smile on my face and with ease? Everything is such a struggle for me....I just want to be normal!!! Im very angry and resentful that I am not.

    Sorry for complaining. I need so badly to talk to someone...I feel so alone....even when my hubby tried to get close to me or talk to me....I STILL feel very isolated and alone.
  2. Sandyz

    Sandyz New Member

    I`m praying for you tonite. This is a very isolating illness and so very hard to live with. I get so sick of it too I don`t think I can do it another second many days. But I just try to get through the day, and give myself a pat on the back everynite.

    I admire you greatly that you are so strong your still working. I am struggling to keep up with being a stay at home mom. I used to try to be Super Women too, but I had to give that fight up. Perfectionism has to go with this illness. The truth is "very few things are worth being doing perfectly."

    We are here for you and understand because we all go through it too everyday. Sometimes just surviving is enough.

    God bless,
    [This Message was Edited on 05/14/2004]
  3. LindaH

    LindaH New Member

    This is one place that people understand. Other than talking to God it is the best thing for you to do. We all have to have someone to talk to. Who better to understand than one with the same illness and problems.

    I am so sorry you are having a rough time. I understand your frustrations. My daughter and her family live with my husband and me. I love them all dearly but it would be wonderful to have some alone time and some uninterrupted(sp)sleep.

    Please try to take care of yourself. I know you have children but let them learn to help and become self-sufficient. Come here anytime to talk and ask for prayers. I will keep you in my prayers and thoughts.

    God bless
  4. dash

    dash New Member

    You don't know what these "super" women are like behind closed doors, or what they've had to give up to lead the lives they have.

    The truth is that this society keeps raising its expectations of what our children "need" to grow up happy.
    Where are the days when kids enjoyed sports by playing with their friends in a neighborhood game?

    I'm beginning to believe that all these "organized" activities are robbing our kids of a creative childhood and stressing families to the breaking point.

    As for all those social engagements, try sending a gift and not attending some of them.

    Have you set goals that are impossible to meet? When you do, you are walking a path of misery.

    The only totally righteous judge of your success or failure is God. Everyone has to ask if they are meeting His expectations-not their own expectations, or anyone others.

    You need to ask the Lord what, if any, changes you need to make to ensure you are not harming your health and your spiritual and emotional well being. Then you pray for the grace and strength to carry through His will. How does God accomplish insurrmountable situations in our life? "Not by power, not by might, but by My Spirit says the Lord of hosts" Zecharia 4:6

    You are a child of God and your identity is in Christ, not in the world.

    Love in Christ,

  5. Montysmum

    Montysmum New Member

    I am sorry you are going through such a hard time, I have had my moments, at present I am on the up, apart from a cold. But I wanted you to know you are not alone, this difficult period hopefully will pass soon for you too.
    The sleep deprivation is hard going, I get very little sleep, it does catch up with you & makes you feel so down, I don't have the answer, but just wanted to let you know I am praying for you.
    [This Message was Edited on 05/14/2004]
  6. another_painful_day

    another_painful_day New Member

    wish I had some good news about feeling better but actually Im really worse tonight...I have been tested all day...it began when I woke up..
    -went to work, boss's wife "nit-picked" my work and in suttle words hinted Ill lose my job for little mistakes...stress number one (almost in tears!!!)
    -My stomach was so bad after that I was on brink of vomitting by my desk all day and scared I was going to lose my job...and worrying about money here....
    -exhuastion hit hard...all day...and I was weak...I couldnt wait to leave...I was sick of listening to boss's wife complain about how "going out to dinner tonight was a hassle because her one rich friend was a bit of a pain to hang out with and also they couldnt agree on a restuarant" and also all about her "bad pedicure" she had done yesterday all after her threatening my job this morning and me having the stress of financial issues going on here at home....(aint that a kick in the teeth!!!!)
    -Came home, took a quick walk to relieve stress running thru my head before I grabbed the two lil ones at bus stop...went to hug my lil girl when she got off bus and she just ignored me (having a real tough time with her lately).
    _ran around after the two older ones got home, like a chicken with my head cut off, exhaustion and all and STILL didnt accomplish my list of "to-do"s and to-go's...but I did manage to deal with unruley children in the clothing store, visiting hubby at work only to deal with him joking around and putting me into tears while in front of co-worker...
    -And last but not least, finishing off a wonderfully stressful night by yelling at the four kids (mostly two younger ones who were real bad tonight....)feeling like I must really be screwing up to have my youngest daughter so angry at me lately and so miserable, and crying on phone with hubby about what he did and how bad I am feeling...and how Im so stressed Ill be dead soon if I dont get relief....

    So...things havent changed...they are far worse tonight...


    Im here...nice place to visit, wouldnt want to live here but I seem to be having a difficult time geting awya from it.

    say a prayer...I need one real bad. This is one of those days/nights I wish I didnt exist!!!!
  7. Sandyz

    Sandyz New Member

    I`m sorry to hear things are still so difficult for you. I will send out more prayers and positive thoughts for you and your family.

  8. danny3861

    danny3861 New Member

    Sorry to hear that you are having such a rough time and struggling. I will keep you in my prayers and ask the Lord to relieve this pain and suffering you are going thru.
    Bless you.

  9. NewEnglander

    NewEnglander New Member

    everything is a struggle for me too.

    all these things you have shared is not uncommon, many people feel the same way when there health is not the way it should be, your feelings are validated.

    You are not alone, the Lord does watch over you and he loves you very much and see's all your sorrows and your struggles, draw near to him and he will draw near to you.
    with him you can find some peace and have rest.

    hope this helps
    love lisa
  10. danny3861

    danny3861 New Member

    All things can be done thru Christ. Keep the faith.
    I have rough mornings also, and this has helped me tremendously. When I open my eyes in the morning, the first thing I do is pray. I first thank the Lord for all the many blessing he has bestowed upon me. Like my three wonderful kids, my wife, my house, my sight, my sweet dog " Sucker", she is a precious Min Pin. Yes my kids named her that, but it definitely fits her. I thank the Lord for his son Jesus, who died for my sins and everyone sins. I ask and pray that you keep the faith sweet lady. Bless you.

  11. ksimmons

    ksimmons New Member

    You sound so much like me. At least "me" for the last few months. I wish the world would stop for awhile. I have three teens. I work fulltime. My hubby and I are youth leaders. My Dad has terminal cancer and is our pastor. My Gma has severe Alzheimers and sometimes I am the only one who can get her to cooperate. I keep telling my hubby that I just want to go to sleep and not wake up. I am not suicidal - would just rather be "home". My hubby is wonderful - but doesn't understand these feelings. He tries though. I finally went to a doctor and got on some medicine - which is working wonderfully as far as my emotions and motivation go. Problem is that now I am not sleeping - which causes another set of problems.

    Wish we could email. Maybe we could help to pull each other up. Will pray for you.

    Many days, I depend on this verse. "He gives power to those who are tired and worn out; He offers strength to the weak." Isaiah 40:29, NLT
  12. taurb

    taurb New Member

    Hi another painful day
    Sorry to hear of the rough times ur having. take comfort in the fact that u r not alone most of us have been there.
    Ur family and urself r in my prayers. Just ask the |Lord for strength to cope and give him the problems and relax and thank him for being ur shield. Try and prioritise ur day and events which are most inportant to u and ur family. U have to pace ur self as the more stressed and tired u get the more ill u'll feel.
    Ur daughter loves u but she is bewildered and sort of confused as she's picking up vibes from you and as a little person she does not understand and she will naturally think that ur mad at her for what reasons?? a child can imagine hundred of reasons. So try and reassure her and tell her that ur not upset with her but ur not well and u have a bad day or is feeling kind of sad or tired. and u love her etc.
    take care and god bless Urs in Christ.