Most people wouldn't care!!

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by VickyB, May 9, 2003.

  1. VickyB

    VickyB New Member

    I can't believe a relative of mine told me this. I push myself to get through the day-to get past the pain and the suffering to get just what has to be done for the day. Then I am told that most people wouldn't care to keep going to doctor to find out what is wrong with them or hopefully some medication or help.
    That I shouldn't care that I am sick??
    What kind of statement is that??
    Am I being too sensitive or should I care??

  2. KristyW

    KristyW New Member


    You should care that you are sick. I for one am sick of going to the doctors all the time. I wish there was a magical medication that would help us all. Your relative says most people wouldn't care,,,,,,,but that is bull. If those most people had what we have, they would get sick of going to the doctors. People don't realize what pain we are in and they never will unless the experience. It's a fact of life....
    Just take it day by day.......

  3. horsegal

    horsegal New Member

    That relative would eat her words if she were in your shoes. My acquaintences (sp?) give me the same reaction and so do some of my relatives. They don't know, therefore they don't understand. At first (and sometimes it still does) that type of reaction made me mad and hurt my feelings. I also had the need to educate them and to explain. Now, I usually don't waste my breath. I went to a "supper" last night and when people asked how I was feeling I replied some days good, some bad and several people (who know I hve FMS) looked at me like I was nuts or they looked at me like "What the hec do you mean by that? My outlook is that I just put up with it and I do what I need to do to feel better. I get frustrated going to different docs., but I've kept going until recently I THINK I've found a Dr. who at least listens and she says she understands. She is trying. That's made a big difference in my 'tude! When I was going to different Dr.'s, I would sometimes take a break.....I would be so frustrated and I would just give up. Then I would feel really bad and get mad and say to myself "I shouldn't have to suffer!!!" Then I'd find someone else to go see. (Didn't mean to write a book)
  4. jamedw1

    jamedw1 New Member

    you and your immediate family do, tho...
    heck, "i" care that you're sick, so most definately this relative should be off the x-mas card list immediately...

    the only thing you "should" care about is your health, and how you got related to this uneducated, uncaring individual in the first

    what goes around, comes aroung, so advise this relative to get good tasting shoes... :)

    p.s. good luck... and you're in a very caring enviornment, here...
    [This Message was Edited on 05/09/2003]
  5. dolsgirl

    dolsgirl New Member

    comes from someone who doesn't know what it's like to deal with illness day in and day out forever..........they don't get it and won't get it unless it happens to them. Because we have to always remember, "You don't look sick! You look fine!" dolsgirl
  6. VickyB

    VickyB New Member

    I was not sure if I was being overly sensitive or not. I am happy to know that somebody does care!! Thanks for making me feel better!!
  7. Annette2

    Annette2 New Member

    Vicky, you tell this relative that SHE can have MY hand pain for a few hours and then see if she'd "care" to go to the doctor! I think we all do extremely well - putting up with constant pain, never knowing when or where it's going to hit us, and dealing with fatigue. Why not give her a list of all of the symtoms of FMS and see if she could tolerate them without going to a doctor for relief? Tell her to put her money where her mouth is!

    You should care about YOUR health and not about HER being an idiot! She's not a very emphathetic person, is she? My saying is "what goes around comes around"!

  8. Fibrolady37

    Fibrolady37 New Member

    Hi VickyB,
    Of course you should care,ive ahd this problem with my relatives & its because they dont know the pain were going through.
    My big sis accused me of moaning on about me all the time when all i wanted her to do was say "itll be ok".
    Know that we care ok & anytime you need to vent you know where we are.
    Taake it easy
  9. Shirl

    Shirl New Member

    Vicky, no one can relate to this pain unless they have had it. Some are kind, and willing to listen. But I have known the kind of people you are talking about.

    Let no one tell you not to care about your health. You do whatever you feel will help you, and don't worry about the 'nay' sayers!

    I learned to put 'me' first in my life, and not to worry about what ignorant people have to say about me, period.

    I do whatever it takes to make me more confortable, feel better, etc. Those who don't believe me, well you know where they can go.............

    No one knows how this pain feels, unless they feel it themselves. When I had spasms in my back, my husband could not understand what I was talking about.

    He is prone to getting 'Charley Horse's' in his calves, I asked him how did that feel? He said it hurt like hell, and he could not walk when he got them. I told him that is exactly the same pain I had in my back, and I could not 'rub' it out myself like he could with the calf of his leg!

    Since them, he does not 'asked' how bad the pain is, he knows now.

    Give this a try with these people, if it does not work, then just have as little to do with them as you can manage.

    Shalom, Shirl