musings of the insomniac

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by Shannonsparkles, Jun 1, 2006.

  1. Shannonsparkles

    Shannonsparkles New Member

    I miss being up during the day. The leaves are so unimmaginably green that it hurts to look at them. The air is warm, the phone rings sometimes. After 3pm, children run past my window on the sidewalk outside. I can play my recorder and listen to music if I want to. The food tastes better. Time moves at just the right pace. The sun is friendly. I can call people if I'm able, or, if I'm not able, at least I know they're awake too.

    Night is cold, dark, lonely. It's very quiet, except for a few birds that start squeeking obnoxiously around 4am. No one to call.

    Night's not so bad in itself, but going to bed just as the day starts to gain strength is very difficult. When I see the sun, a great surge of life wells up inside me. I want to stretch out like a flower opening and embrace the possibilities of the day. When I pull the blankets up over my head, I feel like I've let a lump of gold drop through my fingers.

    I wonder if people who are able-bodied feel the pleasures of the daytime as keenly as I do. Do they wander along each day thinking about dinner, and work, and never noticing the smell in the air, or the way the clouds are set up? Do they have no other plan than to eat some salty snack and finally get to take their socks off?

    If I could tuck something into the pocket of every Normal this morning, it would be this message: There will never be another day exactly like today. It's yours.

    ((love)) Shannon
  2. Marta608

    Marta608 Member

    You write so beautifully. It made me cry and it made me think.

    Hugs and sweet dreams,