My beloved dad suddenly died this past Wednesday the 21st. I am heartsick, in shock, stunned and scared. Very early Wednesday morning, I heard my mother call out my name, my father woke up and complained about a pain he was having, I rushed to the phone and called 911, meanwhile I went into the bedroom and there was my mom holding my father in her arms. I truly believe he was not aware of what was going on, he was making gurgling sounds and it sounded like minor choking sounds, not sure. The ambulance came, but it was too late. Because my father was not under a doctor's care at the time, they told me it was a coroner case. The coroner came and took him. Meanwhile, I called my sister and her husband and they came right away. I believe my dad may have had a massive heart attack, but of course we will not know for sure until we get the death certificate. I do not know how I had the strength to witness this, call the funeral home, make arrangements, gather up beautiful pictures of his life, go to the bank with my mother, and find the funds to pay for his funeral. I now truly understand the empiness of death. My father did not have any insurance and did not have anything pre-planned. My mother told me he was not feeling too well for a few days, but he refsued to go to the doctor. Maybe this was his time, maybe not, we will never know. He was 79. I couldn't believe all the support and friends and co-workers who came to his funeral, the beautiful support from people in this time of need. My extended family is in Europe and obviously could not be there, but they were with us in their thoughts. I worry for myself and my mother. I will have to figure out the finances and everyting else that comes along with this situation. I am grieving, anxious, worried, fearful and I must find a way to take better care of myself with my FM and care for my mother. He died with my mom and me, the way he would have wanted to, I'm trying to find comfort in this, not sure if I can. I am in shock he was just buried on Saturday. I felt such a need to share this with you, my wonderful on-line friends, I know this post will be hard to read, I am sorry for that. Have to go now the tears are coming very fast. Hugs to all, Chelz.