My husband is helping more

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by EllenComstock, Sep 4, 2006.

  1. EllenComstock

    EllenComstock New Member

    Hi, Everyone:

    About ten days ago I posted a message about my frustration on getting my husband to help out more around the house. One person suggested just no longer doing my husband's laundry. What a simple solution. He and I talked and I told him that from now on I was just going to wash my clothes and the towels and sheets. This way he can wash his own clothes and do it whenever he wants. He puts his dirty clothes in a laundry basket we keep in the closet. When the door is closed, I don't have to see it.

    He's been washing once a week, and if he has room in a load, he puts in a few of my clothes as well. I didn't ask him to do this, but what a help this has been. I don't know why I didn't think about just doing this before. I am trying to train myself to not be a caregiver for everyone. I'm the one who needs the care now.

    Thanks again for everyone's support and helpful suggestions.

    Ellen
  2. ksp56

    ksp56 Member

    Ellen, I am happy your DH is pitching in more. As we all know, every little bit helps us.

    I am proud of you for trying, not being a caregiver for everyone. It must be so difficult, being responsible for your brother even though you love him very much.

    I've found that the more you give to others, the less you give to yourself. Not that helping others is bad, certainly not. It's just, everyone needs to take care of themselves. I truly believe that is what helps us to be there for others.

    I have admired you and respected you since being on this board. You are someone I look up to.

    Take care of yourself. It's not being selfish, just a way of trying to heal yourself.

    Gentle Hugs,

    Kim

  3. NyroFan

    NyroFan New Member

    Ellen:

    Fibro-fog. I just sent you a blank message and am glad that the powers that be did not put it through.

    Anyway: your hubby sounds like a great guy. In the long run If the do little things like that for you, they will do more later on down the road.

    nyrofan
  4. hugs4evry1

    hugs4evry1 New Member

    It does sound simple doesn't it?

    I haven't done my husband's laundry for years up until recently when he got sick. At least now he takes most of it to the dry cleaner's so it's no big deal.

    I'm so glad it's working out for you...any time you need more tips on what men really can do for themselves, let me know!

    Hugs,

    Nancy B.
  5. EllenComstock

    EllenComstock New Member

    for the compliments and support. It is funny the things that we continue to do when there is often an easy solution. We women are raised to be caregivers and to neglect ourselves. This is especially bad for those of us with chronic illnesses.

    Thanks, again.

    Ellen