My mother has been gone 6 years tomorrow

Discussion in 'Comfort, Grief and Advice' started by sunflowergirl, Jul 2, 2013.

  1. sunflowergirl

    sunflowergirl Active Member

    Hard to believe. I still miss her. She was my best friend and there's such an emptiness left. She lived to be almost 99 but was sharp in her thinking to the very end. I can only hope I can be that way no matter how long I live.

    I would like to share her final few hours with you. She was transferred from the hospital to hospice because they found MRSA in her urine. She had been in the hospital for tests for her swallowing and they told her that from now on she could only take solid forms, like yogurt but no liquids. I think she determined on her own that she would end her life at that point. Her final days of her life she would eat only a little yogurt. She was also on oxygen all the time.

    She had mentioned to my son that she would like to taste beer one more time.....this was a giant surprise since she would only have a glass once or twice in the summer when it was really hot and didn't drink at all. Her last day I was not with her that evening, planning on going back after I had slept a few hrs. My son, my husband and my brother were with her and my son had brought a 6 pack of beer to the hospice (people were allowed at this private facility). He poured everyone a small glass, she raised her glass and took a few sips then gave it to someone else. I believe she toasted her life in her own special way. She died about 4 hrs. after that. I wish I had been with her before she passed but I guess God didn't want it that way.
  2. jaminhealth

    jaminhealth Well-Known Member

    Sun, sweet story about the beer toast....your mom had a long life...

    My mom would have been 104 on July 1, she passed at 91, I was with her holding her hand and telling her "it was OK to go mom"...she ended up with cancer that took her. She didn't want to leave her children but it was time for her to go....

    I often want to pick up the phone and call her, but instead I think of her every day...

    I've had some bridge friends that went in their sleep recently and that's my HOPE....We will all go, but never know how... Take care. jam
  3. sunflowergirl

    sunflowergirl Active Member

    Julie......actually because she went quickly you and your whole family received a blessing. I know it's hard when you go thru it but it's much harder when they have to suffer and still die. Even so, we still miss them so much.
  4. Bluebird537

    Bluebird537 Member

    The way you described it, it sounds like she passed in peace. I pray for you and your family. I understand the situation is difficult, but just remember there are people who love you, and will support you every step of the way.

    John 10:27-29
    Jesus said: “My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all, and no one is able to snatch them out of the Father’s hand.”
  5. fight4acure

    fight4acure Member

    Hugs to you! It's been 10 years since my grandmother passed. You'll never stop loving and missing them!

    Love,
    Fight ;)
  6. sunflowergirl

    sunflowergirl Active Member

    I wrote that post last July.......and here it is, 7 years after she passed and my DH just died a few weeks ago. July is NOT a good month for me. I went from my parents home to being married......46 years......and now I find myself alone. I'm trying to be brave about this whole empty house and trying hard to adjust. My son has been with me almost 3 weeks, of which I'm very grateful, but he's got a life to get back to, so will fly home on monday. So now I'm considering adopting a dog to keep me company. But with 2 grown cats in the house already, just don't know how things will go with that.
  7. Granniluvsu

    Granniluvsu Member

    Sun - I am not sure how I would feel if and when I might be alone. I am guessing that I might have an animal but not sure what. Growing up we had a cat and a dog but not at the same time. Not sure how your two kitties might be with a dog especially since they are older. If they all grew up together it might be a different situation and it also might depend on the breed of dog and of course temperament of the kitties.

    Good luck in making your decision. Getting out is also a good thing for you and your painting, Check it all out little by little and you will be fine. I know that it might take some time as this situation for you is still so new.

    Losing my parents was hard but we lived thousands of miles away from them for many years I was used to them being physically gone but mom and I wrote letters to each other weekly. I looked forwards to them every week. She also died at age 93.

    Blessings to you sweetie and all who posted.
    Granni