Need Help with My Quandary

Discussion in 'Spirituality/Worship' started by Elisa, Oct 18, 2007.

  1. Elisa

    Elisa Member

    Here we go again...

    My Father's birthday is on Sunday and I am getting intense pressure to attend. I would love to go - as I have no problem with my Dad. He is a kind and loving person. He has really been there for me - helping me with so much since I have been sick - showing no resentment toward me - just love.

    Unfortunately, my sister and her boyfriend (who where shockinglu abusive to me in Aug and think that's "okay") will attend.

    What in the world am I going to do? In order to protect myself will I have to forgo every birthday and holiday? It is so hard for me - as I am sck and alone with no family of my own. And I really look forward to holidays and birthdays - always have...

    I feel like I am being punished. How is it possible that these two people can commit such an act of abuse and I am the one that suffers and can't attend events?

    I know, I know, I have written about this ad nauseum. But I just can't find an answer - it just seems so unfair.

    I know I am very sensitive - but I also know that I can not risk the emotional and physical abuse. (On top of it all I've had a fever for 4 mos now - in and out of hospital) My sister's boyfriend is a loaded gun - and I am the target - with her approval. It's aweful and feels evil to me. I have really bad nightmares about them - since it happened.

    Anyway I just had to write up my current quandary as the advice from all of you has been so reassuring and wise.

    Thank you so much,

    Elisabeth
  2. MIssAutumn

    MIssAutumn New Member

    It's for your Father. It's time to show forgiveness you asked for. It's time to show God you want to really get closer to Him. It'll be the hardest thing you'll do but then Christ going to the cross for all of us sinners, your sister and brother in law included was hard to do also.

    If they don't repent what will be a harsher punishment for them, you not going - they won't care or God 's judgment on them. I know I never what to hear a "Woe, unto you" from our Father.
    Pray the blood of Christ over yourself for protection, claim the promise God gave to us. This evil was defeated you are a child of God so claim that!!!

    This will be hard and the only one who can help is Christ. Elisabeth, I've been there I know what it is like but I also know Christ is there for us - his children.

    Even if it's to give your dad a hug and kiss then leave if you have to, but you have to forgive even if they don't, and it sounds like they won't. Leave it to God. TRUST

    Dear Father we lift up Elisabeth for your protection and guidance, to give her wisdom and courage in dealing with her family, that her family will see Your Love and forgiveness. To claim the promise of your protection. In the name of Jesus, Amen
    Sarah
  3. Isaiah43

    Isaiah43 New Member

    I understand your delema, and in alot of ways, sarah is right, you can't and shouldn't dishonor your dad, at the hand of your sister, and you have every right to be there too. Pray Pray Pray before you go, ask for His grace, his love to surround you and to put blinders on you and your ears so if something is said, or done, it will not affect you to their satifaction. Pray for strength, wisdom and love for them. and remember, No where in the bible does it say for you to be the devils personal punching bag. Hold your head up high, girl, your a child of the most HIGH God, you are royaly,and turning the other cheek wasn't intended for it to get slapped too. If they start in, ask God to give you grace, and if you have to leave, don't leave angry, just leave, don't let them see that their ways effect you. Remember, you can let loose and cry in Gods presence and you will receive comfort. will be praying for you.
  4. joyfully

    joyfully New Member

    I'd go and make sure you stick close to someone else during the party. Tell someone you trust that you don't want to sit next to your sister and abusive boyfriend. Ask this other person to help you navigate away from being forced to sit next to them.

    I think the other important thing to do is body language. If you present yourself as a victim, the two of them will treat you like a victim. If you present yourself as a confident victor, your body language will be quite different.