need prayer again

Discussion in 'Spirituality/Worship' started by NewEnglander, Feb 6, 2004.

  1. NewEnglander

    NewEnglander New Member

    Hi there
    my husband came back and is living in my basement. (good basement)
    He does not want to commit to the marriage (16yrs) by stopping the verbal and mental abuse.

    But would never leave me (I think he's afraid too) very confused. either that or he just likes to play head games.

    His mother tried to verbaly abuse me once and it sounded just like him, it was wierd, must be a generation thing she has passed away now.

    boy did I pay that year. I knew I would, I loved her too but I knew he would take it out on me.

    I ask him to please commit to one or the other.
    the marriage or seperation.

    My heart has grown cold and he thinks everything will be alright.

    I don't even know if I would want couceling at this point, and don't think he would do it, a pride thing.

    this is a turning point in our marriage. Hes been screaming divorce before we were even married, I was young and dumb and married him anyway.

    I need to let him stay for now so I can get help with the bills. do some thinking and check out some condo's.
    look into some realtors.

    Its really sad, if he could only stop and he could if he wanted to.

    I thought things were suppose to get better with age.

    October was our anniversary and he was mad again and spent 10 days in the basement, and not talking to me, don't see him because their is a door he enters throught the downstairs. anyway, 15 years of marriage and he never wished me a happy anniversary.

    men have asked me out so many times while I was married and I have never been unfaithful. didn't even cared if they had money or not.

    I need the wisdom of God and all I do now. in every move I make.
    my parents are not well and this would break their hearts, which are already broken (physically) I feel trapped.

    I don't want to share my town with him never mind my home.

    I truly loved him deeply but he's destroying that and doesn't even know it. he can have his indifference because I am feeling so much better since I have started taking the Gauifenesin, starting to have really good days.

    and he throws the illness in my face every chance he gets and I'm tired of feeling guilty because I don't feel good.

    I told my sister that I was feeling better, a lot better and she said "I'm so proud of you" couldn't she be proud of me when I was struggling.

    also my husband feels it would be best financialy if we split up. what a slap in the face. well it won't be for him.

    I know that God hates divorce but I also know that he does not approve of abuse and might want us to split up.

    my husband can go 3 months at a time and be mr. nice guy, really nice. and then all of a sudden he flips. don't get it.

    anyway I'm confused. just want Gods will to be done in my life.
    thank you and God Bless Lisa
  2. PrayerWarrior316

    PrayerWarrior316 New Member

    You have to be so stressed out from all that you are going through.

    I will certainly be praying for you, I will be praying for the Lord's will to be done in your situation.

    Many Blessings to you, Judy <a href='http://www.smileycentral.com/?partner=ZSzeb008' target='_blank'><img src='http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/17/17_1_22.gif' border=0></a>
  3. Lumare41

    Lumare41 New Member

    I will be praying that god gives you the answers soon.I will also be praying that God opens your husbands heart and he sees the hurt he is causing you.
    God Bless,Luann
  4. blessings

    blessings New Member

    It is very difficult when you feel trapped, and do not know which way to turn. I am sorry that you do not have a husband to be a Spiritual covering for you and must make decisions that are very tough.

    Yes, a separation would hurt your parents, but if they knew how you were having to live and how you feel, that would hurt them worse.

    I do pray that your husband would get saved...and I pray that Gods will be done.

    It sounds as if you have are making some wise decisions re;
    looking for a condo. It is apparent you cannot continue this way.

    I pray you will have time alone with the Lord and I know you are seeking His guidance, also, it may be a good idea to find a clergy that you can pour all this out to.

    As far as life getting easier as one gets older, that i think is a myth. Life is always full of ups and downs, sometimes the downs seem more than the ups.

    God is in control and He loves you! Spending time away from your situation, and time to sort out things with the Lord as Your guide and helper, would be a good thing, I think.

    May you not feel alone, but know that the Lord is with you, I pray that He will give you His peace, guidance, direction and order your steps according to His will. God Bless you , dear one. love, blessings
    P.S. Yes, verbal abuse, lack of caring, these hurt more than a beating up. Your spirit is being crushed.
  5. Shirl

    Shirl New Member

    Will keep you both in my prayers, what a difficult situation your are in.


    God bless lady.

    Shalom,Shirl