Need some words of comfort.....

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by opala, Dec 10, 2002.

  1. opala

    opala New Member

    Does anyone else have the same problems - flareups with no apparent cause? I was doing so well, stretching every day, getting light exercise 15 min. per day, etc....then all of a sudden I woke up yesterday and couldn't walk again. Cramping all over....awful pain and numbness. Today was a little better, but not much. Even as I sit here typing, my left shoulder is numb and my lower back is cramping so bad its making me cry.

    I've done nothing different than the normal routine. The only thing I did different was go Christmas shopping on Sunday. But I was only at the store for about half an hour and my husband drove....also a very short distance. And, though I was tired, I didn't hurt this badly on Sunday.

    Why now?

    Just when I start feeling better, I am reminded that I am no longer in control of my own body....that this DD has taken over my life. My rheumatologist said this could be managed and brought under control, and I realize I haven't been taking these new meds all that long, but how can you manage something that strikes for no reason?

    How do you deal with the knowledge that this is for the rest of your life?

    Thanks for listening....

    ...Michelle
    [This Message was Edited on 12/10/2002]
  2. opala

    opala New Member

    Does anyone else have the same problems - flareups with no apparent cause? I was doing so well, stretching every day, getting light exercise 15 min. per day, etc....then all of a sudden I woke up yesterday and couldn't walk again. Cramping all over....awful pain and numbness. Today was a little better, but not much. Even as I sit here typing, my left shoulder is numb and my lower back is cramping so bad its making me cry.

    I've done nothing different than the normal routine. The only thing I did different was go Christmas shopping on Sunday. But I was only at the store for about half an hour and my husband drove....also a very short distance. And, though I was tired, I didn't hurt this badly on Sunday.

    Why now?

    Just when I start feeling better, I am reminded that I am no longer in control of my own body....that this DD has taken over my life. My rheumatologist said this could be managed and brought under control, and I realize I haven't been taking these new meds all that long, but how can you manage something that strikes for no reason?

    How do you deal with the knowledge that this is for the rest of your life?

    Thanks for listening....

    ...Michelle
    [This Message was Edited on 12/10/2002]
  3. darlamk

    darlamk New Member

    I'm sorry you are hurting so much right now. It is frustrating because as you said we never know when we are going to flare. I know I am affected by weather change as well as stress,fatigue, etc. I am also flared by activities. I guess after all these years of dealing with this disease I have calmed down a bit and I try not to figure out why all the time. Maybe that is the wisdom of my late 40's! LOL! (either that or survivng teenagers!)
    I have always been a "live for today" type of person so that makes it easier too. Just give yourself the gentle care you need right now and take comfort in knowing you are not alone. Celebrate the good days!
    Take care,
    Darla
  4. teach6

    teach6 New Member

    To answer your last question first, you take it one day at a time. I was discussing this with my therapist this morning. We both have CFS and FM, I also have NMH. We talked about how we can be going along and feeling like, "Hey, I'm feeling pretty normal!" Then, bang, out of no where a symptom hits and we're back to reality.

    For instance, she was decorating her Christmas tree over the weekend. She felt OK while doing it, but is paying now.

    My guess is that despite the shopping trip being a short one it overwhelmed you. Being out in crowds with lots of noise and other stimulation can put us on sensory overload. Sometimes a fine line divides what is fine to do and what is too much. With practice we become more aware of our boundaries and take more care to stay within them.

    Sometimes we choose to go outside the boundaries because we feel the benefit outweighs the cost. These are decisions I make every day.

    I hope you are feeling better sooon, In the meantime pamper yourself a bit. Soak in a warm tub, take an extra nap, whatever helps you feel better.

    Barbara
  5. Bellesmom

    Bellesmom New Member

    It doesn't matter how much or how little I do, I usually have the "surprise" the next day and have to spend at least one complete day in bed for it. Any time I leave the house I have a letdown the next day or more. If I visit with the grandchildren I inevitably pick one of the little darlings up and wouldn't you know, my hips feel like I've been riding a horse side-saddle or something.

    But I refuse to give up. I can't leave the house very often, seldom do housework, only work 4 hours or so at home a week and try to make lunches for my husband. I can't stand up or sit up for very long at a time so only visit this message board now and then.

    I was in bed one night and for a minutes or so I felt so good and then it was back to how I've been for over 2 years. I could not believe how good I felt that one moment and it has brought me extreme pleasure to remember how nice it is to feel good.

    You can't fear what might happen or be surprised, really, when you have a let down. I have analyzed it until I refuse to do that anymore. So many factors are mentioned on this board daily - weather, stress, etc. And our body is always changing, too, even if we weren't sick. So you never know what causes it.

    Well people, especially doctors, just don't know what they're saying when they guarantee that what they do for you will take care of everything. There is always hope but no guarantee.

    Hang in there - we're all here for each other.

    Love
    Pam
  6. Sandyz

    Sandyz New Member

    I felt really bad today too. I think I`ve overdoing things lately with Xmas and everything else going on.
    I ended up having a good old long cry today. That made
    me feel better anyway.

    Just know you`re not alone. We are in this together. I
    keep holding out hope that this won`t be forever. I`ve
    had it 15 years already. I`m really SICK of this illness.
    But I feel in my gut that we are close to some new break
    throughs and some answers for this illness. There HAS to
    be relieve soon, because I can`t take it anymore. Hehe!

    ASk God to lighten the burden when it gets to be to much
    and he will

  7. BonBons

    BonBons New Member

    Hi Michelle - I know you live in central Florida; maybe the rainy cold weather we're having and that one extra trip did it. Congratulations for asking for some verbal kindness. Picture a hot cup of tea, your best friend gently rubbing your back, and everyone smiling at you with their eyes (too) and telling you how terrific you are just for being. Not doing. I hope you have a better day tomorrow. BonBon
  8. pam_d

    pam_d New Member

    I have asked your very same question for a while...what makes a flare happen, especially when it does not seem to be connected to any added stress, activity, etc. I have definitely wondered this same thing! I will have flares for seemingly no reason...yet I will also have times of feeling pretty good in the midst of terrible stress, or having "overdone" it.

    I know I'm not much help! I can certainly relate, tho, & have often wondered what is the common denominator that I'm not detecting that makes a flare period happen. Mine, too, can last a few days or a few weeks, it seems. I even see patterns sometimes of kinds of symptoms--- but no way to predict or prevent them!

    Good luck, Michelle, I know this is all very frustrating & you are not alone in the confusion!

    Hugs,
    Pam