Last week I was feeling pretty strong so my husband, son and I decided to go to the conservatory and small zoo. I walked quite a ways that day, but was enjoying myself so kept going. Well, duh, I crashed about a day later, thought I was going to die (literally), was fully bedridden for about 3 days, now a week later still mostly housebound, but able to prepare my food, sit a bit at computer etc. The problem is that this put a huge tension between my husband and me, or I should say, brought the underlying tension to the fore, and now we are barely talking. It is so stressful and making it harder for me to come out of flare. He is tired of dealing with me, and is angry at me for "being stupid" about overdoing it last week, even though he was there with me and never once suggested that we should cut it shorter. He is tired of dealing with me, of never knowing whether I am going to be up or down, or adjusting his life for me. Of my need for quiet and order. Of seeing me in pain or bedridden from weakness. And although he knows it is not my fault that I have this, deep down he blames and resents me, especially when I have crashed. I am tired of feeling I have to justify my small existence, of feeling like I am dragging him and others around me down. I feel ashamed and humiliated seeing myself through his eyes, and the eyes of others close to me. When I am alone, even though I may still feel anger or grief about what I cannot do, I accept and am comfortable with myself. I don't know what to do and am worried my marriage is going to completely fall apart, while at the same time a small part of me wonders if that would maybe be a relief, as terrible as that sounds. Not because I don't love my husband any more, but just to take that piece of stress out of the picture. We have had many times when we have lived apart for months at a time due to work. Now that is looking kind of nice. Honestly, I don't know how to fix this. Anyone else have thoughts like these?