Need to vent...thanks in advance

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by angelinpain, Oct 19, 2008.

  1. angelinpain

    angelinpain New Member

    Hey everyone!
    I hate posting like this, but I need an outlet where I feel people understand me. I currently am feeling very alone. I live in Las Vegas and my family is on the east coast. I am going through a falling out with my best friend, who is also on the east coast and am desperately trying to make friends here in vegas, but am having difficulty. I am going through so much and feel like I need the support that friendships offer, but I don't have many people to turn to. My family is getting tired of the same negativity. I am trying to make friends in vegas and thought that I had the beginnings of friendships in my two new roommates. The past two weeks I've noticed that things have been very strained and they have been spending more time together and not including me. It hurts my feelings, but I'm realizing that I'm just so desperate to find friendships that I am forcing things. I just need someone to care about me. I am very depressed and feel like my life is going terribly awry, but I have trouble just accepting the fact that I really don't have any friends and I have to deal with things and the difficulties of life all alone. I am single and have no real prospects for a relationship either. I feel like I have nobody to turn to and I feel so alone. I know I SHOULD be able to stand on my own two feet, but I am having trouble.

    Thank you for letting me vent. I'm sorry.
  2. doggymommy

    doggymommy New Member

    I posted a ridiculously similar message just a few days ago =)

    I don't have any friends either and very recently broke up with my boyfriend who was unfortunately pretty much all I had.

    Basically I know how you feel and I'm so sorry because nobody should have to feel this way.

  3. angelinpain

    angelinpain New Member

    I definitely understand. I'm sorry you and your bf broke up. I read your post from the other day that he was trying to "one up" you on your sickness vs. his depression. It seems like guys almost get jealous when they are dealing with the chronically's almost like they think we WANT to be sick. Part of what has me upset is that my roommates ganged up on me and told me I'm not doing my part of the chores. I do housework and I feel like I do do my part, but they feel since I don't work as much as they do I should do more. I also am upset because I pay more rent and still am expected to do more chores. I made the mistake of looking at them as potential friends...not just roommates. It's my fault. I just have to learn how to be on my own. I appreciate and am also sorry that you understand how I feel. I hope things get better and, again, I'm sorry about your bf. It's tough when a relationship ends. I just got out of one too.
  4. robin1667

    robin1667 New Member

    I read your post. I am so sorry you are feeling this way. There are people who care about you!

    As I have gotton older,I don't have as many friends as I use to. Not because I don't want them. It's sometimes just part of life. Everyone is different, they go their seperate ways. It doesn't make you who you are by the number of friends a person has.
    If your able, go for a walk in a park. Find a place that plays Bingo,maybe you think that's boring. But I have found it to be a lot of fun. Give it a try. You may even find some new friends. It's always hard to find new friends when you move away. But you need to get out and find them.
    Why are you paying more of your rent than the rest? That doesn't sound fair. Do your roommates know about your physical problems? Get them informed about it. Why should you pick up after your roommates? Just because you are home more? That's just not right either. The chores should be split. You need to sit down with them and talk if this is going to work. Tell them because of your physical limitations you can do so much and that is it.If your paying more in rent,I would think they could do more than their share. After all your helping more financially.Some people are just selfish and can't see past their own noses. Maybe you should consider new roommates?
    If your negativity is causing problems,try to be uplifting when they come home. If they don't want to hear your problems,come here and vent,someone will be here for you.
    I hope you feel better soon! And you are never alone,we are here for you! Gentle Hugs, Robin
  5. Janalynn

    Janalynn New Member

    Hi there-
    A couple of things- First, I think we've all been in your position before. I'm much older now, but I've been through the roommate thing, and also been in the position of being alone across country from everyone I knew.

    It's always hard when there are THREE. Always. Your roommates can still be your friends, just maybe not your best friends. Find outside friends or outlets. I agree that a "sit-down" is in order.

    I remember years ago when I moved I wanted to do things so badly, but didn't know anyone, felt isolated etc. In time that all changes. I promise. You're in VEGAS. There are SO many FREE things to do there!!!

    You mentioned you work - are there any chances of budding friendships there? Don't "force" anything. Friendships follow a natural progression.
    I would take this time to work on ME. Look at this time as a growth period - a time to become who you want to be. Write in your journal or do whatever you like to do.

    My life changed (for the better) when I moved and what I call "reinvented" myself. I looked at it as such a wonderful opportunity. Hard - yep, VERY hard, in the beginning because I felt alone, but you'll find that people will soon to attracted to YOU, when you become who you want to be. People choose friends because they like the way they feel when they are around them. If you're negative all the time, no one will want to be around you.(not saying YOU are, just speaking in general)

    Try to put a smile on your face - even if you have to fake it, when you walk out the door in the morning, or when you walk in your apartment at night. It's amazing how something as simple as a smile attracts people.

    AND one more very important thing- you can vent anytime you want! Come here to vent!