new here - can anyone relate? (VERY LONG)

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by missbecky82, Jan 13, 2006.

  1. missbecky82

    missbecky82 New Member

    Hi all...I hope this is okay to post here. I am so sad and upset right now that I just need someone to talk to.

    My name is Becky! I'm 23 and have been suffering from health anxiety most of my life. Everytime I'm sick, I jump to the worst possible scenario. For example: if I have a cold, it's pneumonia; headache = brain tumor; pain = cancer.

    I am literally scared to death of the doctor. I avoid going as much as possible because I know I would drop dead of a heart attack if I was to find out I had something seriously wrong. Yeah, I'm a baby. I don't want to be like this. I just don't know how to think rationally when it comes to my health.

    Anyway, I've been on Lexapro off and on for the last few years. When I'm on it, I feel pretty normal and can think more positively about things. But, I tend to gain a LOT of weight on this.

    So, on December 31st, I was chilling out with my boyfriend when I suddenly felt extremely exhausted for no reason whatsoever. I took a nap, felt better and didn't think anything of it.

    I was okay on New Years Eve, but New Years Day I felt awful again. My joints started hurting. My feet hurt when I walked on them. TMI I know...but I have really "loose" bowels movements as well. My hands are hurting and even my fingertips hurt. I can't figure out what is wrong with me. I keep getting these periods of exhaustion since then. I just feel like I need to lay down and my whole body aches.

    I am so worried that I have leukemia or something terrible. I KNOW I need to go to the doctor but I am too deathly scared. I will more than likely drag myself in next week.

    Everytime I type my symptoms up in google, it comes up with CFS or Fibromyalgia. These would actually be a relief to me as it's not something fatal, although I know it can be extremely debilitating.

    I keep reading that CFS/Fibro is related to mono somehow. I think I had mono when I was about 17 years old. I thought it was strep but it wouldn't go away with antibiotics and it took about a month to completely leave.

    Do my symptoms sound like CFS and/or Fibro at all? I would like to hear your honest opinions. Ideally, I would like to get some reassurance before I drag myself to the doctor so I can calm myself down because I'm severely panicking!!

    I'm sorry if I sound completely neurotic but I am so upset and have never felt this way before. I feel like I can't go to the grocery store without my feet hurting or feeling extremely tired. :(

    I also want to add that my appetite has been pretty normal, although during my most anxious times I don't have much of one. I am still fat and haven't lost weight, and my lymph nodes don't appear to be swollen. I just feel completely miserable. The worst part being the joint pain and debilitating fatigue.
    [This Message was Edited on 01/13/2006]
  2. Pianowoman

    Pianowoman New Member

    I'm sorry that you are having so much trouble at such a young age. You have come to a really good place for support and information. There are lots of people here, many of them as young as you who can relate to what you are going through.

    Many of your symptoms sound like CFS/FM but, of course, you know that you need to get a diagnosis. Getting a diagnosis early on will help you to get on with the proper treatment. There is a much better chance of improvement if you go soon.

    I know it can be a bit scary but it's worse not knowing.
    You can read old posts here and get some ideas about what you should do.

    Good Luck
    Kathy.

  3. missbecky82

    missbecky82 New Member

    Thank you both. You are wonderful for replying to me. I have talked to my doctor about my nerves but she doesn't want to prescribe my Xanax because she says it can be addicting. It is so hard to cope with my health anxiety sometimes.

    I just don't know how I'm going to get through the weekend. I have 3 days off and I know I will be miserable at home, wondering what is wrong with me and if I'm on my deathbed.

    I keep taking my temperature and it's been about 97.6 everytime. What causes such a low body temp??

    I have been reading through all the posts and many of the symptoms sound similar to mine.

    Thanks again and sorry for rambling.