I’m a 41 year old working mom of 2 young children, ages 3-1/2 and 6-1/2. I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia just 2 months ago. Like many of you, my road to diagnosis has been a long one, with many side-trips along the way. I have been treated for depression, ADHD (both of which I believe I do have, but are secondary to the Fibro). I have always been a high achiever. I studied for, took and passed the CPA exam while I was on maternity leave with my youngest daughter. I was also recovering from a c-section at that time, and had to have my gallbladder removed 8 weeks after that. But it wasn’t long after that thing started going downhill rather quickly for me. At 18 months of age, my daughter was diagnosed with Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis. That is when the real stress in my life took hold. I suffered for post partum depression after the birth of my son, and even more so after the birth of my daughter. This time, however, I knew I needed to get myself help in order to be well enough to continue to help my daughter. I had been feeling bad but it was shortly after this that I went to a psychologist to seek help for depression. I felt like I was in a constant fog, not enjoying the things I used to enjoy, severe mood swings, anxiety, etc. Time went forward and my daughter’s symptoms just disappeared after several trials and errors, and a short stint of methotrexate injections that we finally agreed to administer to her after nothing else seemed to work. My husband and I made the decision to take her off all meds after her arthritic symptoms had vanished, but we had started to see issues with her bowel movements. We could never be sure if the bowel issues were from her meds and the docs were just blowing us off, so we just made the decision on our own. She was off all meds for a few months when we began to see blood in her stool…..back to the doctors…this time at not quite 3 years of age, she endured blood test after blood test, stool samples, you name it…then the colonoscopy and the final diagnosis of ulcerative colitis…..at 3 years of age!. Her disease is still not under control today. We are working on it, but it is a daily struggle. She is now on remicade infusions and other stuff that just kills me to even think about for too long. All of the time that this is happening, I am holding on for dear life to my job…a job I’ve had now for 9 years. I work in accounting, and it’s a good position, but my job is not stable…I am in the real estate industry. Everywhere around me, people are losing their jobs. It’s a very negative environment. There is another ‘arm’ of the company that is doing very well. The employees work right along side those of us who are wondering everyday how long we have left. What is worse, the ‘chosen ones’ act like vultures, not sympathetic in the least to those who are worried about their livelihoods in a dim economy. My department has gone from 12 people to 3, to give you an idea of the impact. Over the last year or so, I had started to notice that my memory and brain fog issues had really started to affect my job performance. I used to be a top performer. Now I can barely keep it together. I forget things all the time..even from a few minutes ago. I’ve made a lot of mistakes, from minor to serious. With the environment like it is, I feel like I’m constantly under a spyglass, with someone waiting for me to screw up again so they can find a reason to let me go. It’s also a very male-dominated business, and egos are very big here….I am constantly biting my tongue, but right now I don’t feel I can afford to be the one who stands up or stands out, if you know what I mean. I need to keep this job. My daughter and I both need the benefits. My husband is working, but is a real estate agent, so basically I am the only source of income for our family. We had chosen this arrangement so that my husband could be flexible with helping with my daughter’s doctor’s appointments and blood labs and such, as my job doesn’t always allow for that, especially now… So I had been seeing both my psychiatrist and my primary doctor, and complaining all along about the constant fatigue that just seemed to be getting worse. And the brain fog…which is how I described it exactly before I even heard of it referred to as such on the fibro-boards. My psychiatrist and my primary both tried various things….switching my antidepressant, adding provigil, etc….nothing seemed to dust the cobwebs out of my brain or shake this fatigue that just has taken over my life. I just kept complaining and keeping track of my symptoms and finally a couple of months ago, everything just starting clicking and falling into place…the pain, the brain fog, the fatigue, and my primary doc immediately mentioned fibro. He ran many blood tests to rule out thyroid, inflammation, etc. and after all of this, diagnosed me with fibromyalgia. He said he has many FM patients, so it is good to know that at least I am working with a doc who believes it exists. Right now, I am taking Cymbalta 60mg am and pm, topamax 50mg am and pm for migraines, and meloxicam for pain. I also take adderall xr 20 mg in the am and adderall ir 5mg in the pm for my adhd. I’m starting to add supplements and vitamins too, as I’m not completely satisfied with the meds I’m on. In a way, it has been a relief to know that at last there is a reason for all of these symptoms I have. The brain fog, the depression, the pain that hops all over my body, the crushing fatigue that won’t let up, the sensitivity to everything…light, sunshine, heat/cold, noises, touch, the migraines, TMJ, digestive issues….the list goes on and I’m sure you know it well. On the other hand, I struggle with figuring out how to come to grips with this. I come home from work and I have absolutely no energy left to do anything else. Things are so backed up in my household that it’s ridiculous. Filing, bills, cleaning, laundry. My husband does a lot of work around the house, and I believe he should as his job right now is very ‘undemanding’. But I don’t think he likes it. He feels I should contribute too. He feels I should want a clean house. And I do. But I just can’t muster up the energy for it. I cook dinner, help my son with homework, bathe the kids if they don’t fuss too much about it, make sure my daughter gets her meds, and basically wait on the kids as much as they need all evening (dd needs a lot of help with bathroom visits still with her condition). That is about all I have energy for these days. On a good weekend I may be able to help with putting away some laundry and cleaning the kids rooms and picking up a bit around the house. Our money situation isn’t the greatest with all of my dd’s medical bills, and now mine. I have good insurance, but still the bills are up there, plus I’m the only income. Hubby is on me all the time about improving our situation….he wants to sell our house, but of course with the real estate market what we could sell it for is less than what we owe on it. I say let’s just chill here for now. He won’t let up Now let me say I love him to death, but he is a high maintenance guy. He talks incessantly. Did I also mention my son is in non-stop motion? There are times when I come home and hubby and kids are constantly talking at me all night. I feel so drained that I just want to run away and never come back! I feel so guilty for even thinking this, but it’s just all so much! I’ve tried to explain to hubby between my job, dd’s illness, my illness, our financial situation and just living life, I’m on constant overload…please don’t ADD anything else. But he always does. Sorry for the LOOOONG intro….guess you can see I’ve got a lot going on! Glad to be here. I’ve been spending a lot of time reading and can see that there is a wealth of knowledge and experience, so I look forward to learning a lot here to help turn things around for me.