No Purpose In Life

Discussion in 'Fibromyalgia Main Forum' started by greatgran, Mar 21, 2010.

  1. greatgran

    greatgran Member

    There are many days I feel I have no purpose in Life. Does anyone else ever feel this way?

  2. HeavenlyRN

    HeavenlyRN New Member

    There are many days that I feel like this. I'm 55 years old and up until last December 23rd, I had a wonderful job that I loved as a hospice nurse.

    Now, most days I just sit around on the couch, or sleep. It's a thrill for me to go to the store these days, but I can usually last only 15 minutes or so before I feel like we have to leave. It's painful for me to even walk the dog. Doing laundry takes me a whole day. I have to have a reason to shower (sorry, probably too much information so early in the morning!!).

    Yes, I believe alot of us feel this way. No way to go through life, is it?
    [This Message was Edited on 03/22/2010]
  3. jole

    jole Member

    Yes! I feel that way nearly every single day in the winter. I don't leave home, and the kids are rarely come to visit. Hubby is busy and tends to avoid talking to me. My pain is horrible and I don't think clearly. I'd love to be able to help others and can't, which is the hardest part of all. I think a sense of purpose is totally being able to do for others.......I was a nurse in my "past" life, and miss it so much! I feel that my spirit is gone.

    But then spring comes (hopefully) and I can sit out on the porch and marvel at nature, feel the sunshine on my face and smile again. At least then when the grandkids come I can be their cheering section when they're outside days that's the extent of my usefulness, other than praying. My faith is what keeps me going or I'd have given up completely. I hope things improve for you with the coming warm weather.......Jole
  4. greatgran

    greatgran Member

    Thanks for your input. I can so relate to how life use to be. Now I am wondering what happen to happiness. I get out of bed and think now what or what pill to take (not that I have found any that work). My doc and daughter suggested medatation. I am so limited to what I can do and I want to do so much especially for others.

    Yes, I know I should be so thankful I can get out of bed in the morning and I really am. I do pray for answers but seems I am not finding any. I would like a hobby that really interest me but not interested in much of anything except my greatgrans . There again I want to do with and for them but unable to do. They need me as my daughter is raising them and she needs help.

    Please forgive me for my pity party but don't like having one alone. Oh, I have tried many andtidepressants and haven't found one that I can tolerate due to side effects.

    God Bless you,
  5. greatgran

    greatgran Member

    Sorry, you are feeling this way. I sure can relate . I do wish I would stop looking back and look forward but can't seem to find a light at the end of the tunnel. I am this way even in the summer. Then I will have a few days I don't feel so useless and its a good feeling.

    I pray and know that there is a reason I am going through this and a reason I am still here but if I am getting answers I am not seeing them.

    Even with all the limitations I want happiness and peace inside.

    Thanks and Prayers,
  6. hermitlady

    hermitlady Member

    And nothing to look forward to but another day of misery. I'm just existing. Too fatigued to do anything and have zero motivation. Very depressing, sorry.

    JEANSKI New Member

    I have been dealing with that lately. I am 30 and have no life and no goals for the future because I just don't know what I can invest in when my health is all over the place like it is.

    I take comfort in my cats. I have three of them and focus on taking really good care of them physically and emotionally. Its something!

    My family reminds me how much they enjoy my company and my spirit. I try to remember that somedays my purpose is to be part of a family. I am a daughter and a sister and an Aunt.

    Don't let convention dictate to you what "purpose" means. Create your own definition. I know you are a great asset to us here. You should know that.
  8. quanked

    quanked Member

    Today is one of those days. I feel like I am just taking up space and using resources better spent elsewhere.

    I just keep hoping that I will find a way out of these dd's or at least find some relief.

    I good cry might give me a little relief.

    But these thoughts happen sometimes-- not all the time. I am in trouble if they begin happening all the time.

  9. lynncats

    lynncats New Member

    sorry you feel this way, but I know exactly what you mean. I try to be happy but somedays (most) I just don't seem to have the strength. I've also had alot of problems with antidepressent meds, none work for me, or make me even more irritable. Also having my son disown me and DH, and is pure torture to get thru each day, especially when we have a grandchild who will be 2 in Sept. in we've only seen 2x, and that was when he was first born. I've tried Zoloft, Celexix (sp)?, cymbalta, lexapro. Now I'm waiting for a call from my PC dr. to see what he wants to try next. Wish me luck, and I wish you luck with Everything in your life. Take Care.



    LEFTYGG Member

    shes 91 and just in the last year cant do her baking and cooking. she cries cause what good is she and why why why cant she bake 10 pies in a day.ive been non productive for 5 years i dont think ill make it to 91.if im in this shape dont want to.
  11. greatgran

    greatgran Member

    Thanks to each of you for your replies. It does help to know I am not alone and having a pity party when I feel this way. I posted this on FB and man did I get some "get over it replies". I probably at one time would have said the same but had never walked in the shoes I am walking in now. If so how much sympathy and understand I would have had for others and not taken a run, work, shopping, cleaning, even taking a bath for granted.

    Mornings are worse and I know I probably need an AD but I am just one that can't tolerate them.

    God Bless each of you,
  12. lynncats

    lynncats New Member

    Don't ever think it is a pity Party. Take Care. " as for shoes at least we know their ours, LOL.. NITE


  13. AuntTammie

    AuntTammie New Member

    "If only you could sense how important you are to the lives of those you meet; how important you can be to people you may never even dream of. There is something of yourself that you leave at every meeting with another person." - Mr. Rogers

    saw this today and thought it apt for this discussion

    and I can definitely relate to feeling like my life has no purpose sometimes (I do very much believe that God has me here for a reason, but it is really hard to figure out what that is when everything is such a huge struggle and I don't feel like I am contributing much....sometimes I do feel like I make a difference online, but I so want to do more)

    I do know that there are people who have played a seemingly very small part in my life, though, and yet they matter a lot to me

    ETA: I believe that this quote applies to people we "meet" online, too[This Message was Edited on 03/22/2010]
  14. victoria

    victoria New Member

    Very true.
    I find that being helpful just by giving opinions on what has worked or hasn't, or what research has shown or hasn't, at this site and others definitely give me a purpose. It doesn't matter whether a poster acts on it or not --

    I know so many others are reading, I figure everybody's opinions & knowledge & personal experiences help others figure out what to do when they're feeling like they're at a dead-end.

    Like this thread, for instance!

    all the best,

  15. Waynesrhythm

    Waynesrhythm Member

    Hi Greatgran,

    I just noticed your thread, and thought I'd share a story with you I posted on the Spirituality board a couple years ago (I'll paste it below). This particular story really struck a chord for me, and seems to go to the heart of what you're currently experiencing. I hope you enjoy the story; perhaps it will strike a chord with you as well.

    Best Regards, Wayne

    A young man in Africa was down on his luck. Very down. He had lost his job, his wife left him, and he had lost his home as well. And he was broke.

    He was meandering down a road one night, feeling the blues (understandable). Before long, he came across a young woman with three children who seemed to be on their own and in somewhat desperate straights themselves. I can't remember if they asked him for assistance, but in his desolation, he didn't feel that he had anything to offer them anyway.

    As he started to walk away, he got a strong sense he needed to at least check on them to see what their situation might be. Turns out, the woman's husband had gone to America to look for work and had not been in touch since leaving (a number of weeks had gone by).

    So the young man asked the woman if she had any kind of information that might be helpful in being able to locate her husband. She managed to come up with a telephone number, but she had not been able to try to use it because of her own difficult circumstances. So the young man took the family and the telephone number and went to a nearby house to see if he might be able to somehow contact the woman's husband in America.

    A man at the house had a cell phone, and offered to let them use it to see if they could make contact. Miraculously, they were able to get through and almost by accident managed to contact the husband at that very moment. The woman was able to talk with her husband who had indeed gotten work, had some money, and had been trying desperately to get hold of his family. Arrangements were made to bring the family together again.

    As they were saying their goodbyes, one of the children came up to the young man with a bright smile and told him a very interesting thing. He knew when he first saw the young man go by that he would come back to help them, because that was exactly what he had seen in his dreams the night before!

    I think about this story often when I am feeling quite ill and unable to do very much for others. What I have learned from that story and from my own experience, is that no matter what our circumstances may be, there is ALWAYS something we have to offer. It may be the most important lesson I learned from all my health challenges.
    [This Message was Edited on 03/22/2010]
  16. shari1677

    shari1677 New Member

    Saw my doc today who prescribed me Ritalin. I told him that I'm tired of laying in bed looking out the window, watching time go by. I'm tired of hearing about everyone else's lives and I'm stuck in bed sleeping or too fatigued to do anything.

    So yes - I feel exactly as you do.

    And yes - I have been suicidal - actually since a very young age. I sometimes tell my friends I'm surprised I have lived as long as I have - I am almost 43.
  17. kat0465

    kat0465 New Member

    i wrote ya on facebook, and it really upset me to see how people reacted. i know they dont understand, but it's still sad.
    i can tell you a story about my cousin, who is really sick( like bedridden) with this and other things including insulin dependent diabetes.
    she has a large family 7 brother & sisters, well her older bro had colon cancer( HAD) yes he has a colonostomy and will forever. BUT he is fine now. his cancer is gone.and all her family can say to her is, look at your brother, he works, he didnt go on disability, he doset stay in bed all day, and he had cancer!
    they dont get the fact that his disease is GONE!well ours isnt gone yet. i dont know what part of still sick people dont understand, and sadly it seems to be our closest friends & family that dont get it.
    i dont get that!!!
    {{big hugs}}Kat
    I hope your feeling better, ooh and i havent tried the AD's yet ( you know how that goes)
  18. Im healthy

    Im healthy New Member

    This is amazing. My first time to this board and I saw your post. 2 days ago I had the same thought plaguing me as it does frequently. But I searched for inspiration and reasons for being here and pulled myself out of the funk. While listening to some videos of Bob Proctor (of The Secret) I thought " how can i help others and could I put together some sort of programs for people dealing with chronic challenges like me?" Then i saw your post.
    Even if I am here "only" to give love to my husband or my mother, who lives far away,this is something grand. Then I try to find someone to help, or give hope to, even if a phone call...
    I meditate, read or listen to inspiring works which I will share with you if you want. Started that in 2009 and said "thank you for my healing" several times a day, wrote gratitude thoughts etc in a diary several times a week ( better done every day). I was doing so much better! I went on line to see if I could share what I had learned with others and found info on B-12 which has helped. I keep up that work of trying different remedies but the-mental, spiritual work is key to changing my mood and vibrations. When I do this, my world looks better and I feel better and hopeful. It is not as simple as "affirmations".
    Wayne, those stories such as the African man are there by the thousands. We have to open our eyes and look. Best of health to you!, Cristina
  19. jewels920

    jewels920 New Member

    I've certainly been in that movie.

    But here's the thing: you touch other people's lives without even knowing it.

    When you are able to make it to the store, maybe you walk past someone and smile at them--and that's the only kindness that person received from anyone that day.

    You post on this board and someone is uplifted or feels less alone because they read you are experiencing some of the same things they are experiencing and they thought they were crazy.

    You touch people's lives in ways you may not even realize. That's purpose.


  20. ocl53gal

    ocl53gal New Member

    Greatgran--I think all of us with CFS-Fibromyalgia feel this way from time to time. I have been in a very severe relapse since last September and have had many days when I feel there is no reason for me to go on living. A friend told me to try having a "thankful" party. So when I feel that way I start thinking of all of the things for which I am thankful and remember all of the ways that God has provided for me throughout my life. It doesn't take long when I come out of the "purposeless" feeling. There is an old hymn which I like titled "Great is Thy Faithfulness" and it helps when I think of the words to that song. So don't feel like you are alone as we all feel that way at times.